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Tuesday, December 1, 2009

83

Real America, with Abe Sauer: Oscar Season is for Patriots

obama warna  brotherLike Christmas, and puberty, the Oscar movie season gets earlier every year. This year, one ambitious writer even declared "The Oscar Season Begins In August With Tarantino's 'Inglourious Basterds.'" But by any measure, we are now well into the time of year when Oscar-hopeful films get dumped into theaters to be ignored by almost everyone. This season's crop? The Road, Brothers, Broken Embraces, Precious, A Single Man, Crazy Heart, The White Ribbon, Invictus, Nine, The Lovely Bones, It's Complicated, An Education, Avatar and Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans. (Up in the Air is disqualified for basically being the 40-Year-Old Virgin with moodier lighting.) But what about Oscar season for the crowd who thinks all those liberal Hollywood movies are for socialist pansies? For them, there is Photoshop.

Photoshop (MS Paint?) has become a powerful tool for the right to express its fears, feelings and frustrations with the current administration. Manipulating movie posters proves to be a fun and infectious way to get out the message. The Obamatized movie poster is a staple of right-wing message boards and sites. However, they are very often bad.

So what follows is only the best of the Photoshopped Obama movie posters of 2009.

the illusionist

The Illusionist: Shaky concept. Poor execution. Confusing. Trying to hard to tie things together. Basically just a high-concept fluffed up to look like it has something deeper to say... just like Crash.

liar liar

Liar Liar: An obvious choice. But this entry shines in the credits. Look at the attention to detail. Ashley Dupree's big break!

the sting

The Sting: Way beyond the usual cut and paste of images. This person is very, very talented.

apt pupil

Apt Pupil: Just like with Oscar bait films themselves, on fake posters you can also never go wrong going with Nazis.

duplicity

Duplicity: There is certainly more romantic chemistry between Obama and Pelosi than Julia Roberts has had with anyone in years.

the jerk

The Jerk: Not technically excellent. But with all the words used recently to describe Obama, "jerk" is adorably quaint. This entry is the Little Miss Sunshine of Photoshopped Obama posters. (Also: Cesar Chavez?!?!)
100 days later

100 Days Later: CAMPAAAAAAIIIIIIGGNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!

apologize now

Apologize Now: "The machinist, the one they called Axelrod, was from Chicago. He was wrapped too tight for D.C.; probably wrapped too tight for Chicago. Geithner, on the finances, was a famous professor from the ivies around MA. One look at him and you wouldn't believe he would ever make a profit in his whole life. Clinton... Ms. Clinton... was from some Arkansas shithole and the light and space of D.C. really put the zap on her head. Then there was Rahm, the Chief. It might have been my mission, but it sure as shit was Rahm's boat."

dumber dumber

Dumb and Dumber: There is some concern with how natural it feels to see Biden here.

last whitehouse on the left

Last White House on the Left: Smart! Or at least smarter than the rest.

40 year virgin

The 40-Year-Old Political Virgin: Witty!

boss nigger obama

Boss Nigger: Oh dear. There we go. I think we have a winner.

83 Comments / Post A Comment

KarenUhOh
KarenUhOh (#19)

I like Fred "The Hammer" Thompson for Supporting Evil Honky in that last one.

slinkimalinki
slinkimalinki (#182)

obama looks HAWT in that poster for "the sting".
also, i read day 29 as "satanism". same difference, i guess.

myfanwy
myfanwy (#1,124)

I call shenanigans. Nary a whiff of Comic Sans.

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

More like 'sans comic' amIrighteramIright!?

myfanwy
myfanwy (#1,124)

I am afraid of the people who find these funny.

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

*('Deliverance' banjo tune)

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

I love the juxtaposition of 'bigot' right above the title of that last one.

*head 'splodes!!!

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Thank you! And a tip of the hat to Neal Snow of Nashville, Tennessee who did the photoshop. I understand thousands of these posters were printed out for campaign propaganda in the election of 2008. Alas! They had little impact on the election, but perhaps they did encourage the Obama Joker poster with the "Socialism" caption. Good political propaganda is necessary for political success in this country, and as you can see we Rightists have been "Apt Pupils" created by our teachers on the Left.

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

Ronald Gene, are you still trying to take credit (even in part) for the Obama Joker thing? Sad.

jfruh
jfruh (#713)

I feel obliged to point out that the "Warn A Brother" poster is spoofing t-shirts that are in fact sold to inner-city residents. The bail bondsman across the street from the jail in downtown Oakland, for instance, sold them with the catchphrase "If You See The Police, Warn A Brother," complete with the WB logo.

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

That is one of the poorer bits of awesomeness that can be found on ThePeoplesCube.com
http://thepeoplescube.com/

garge
garge (#736)

The Sting's artist must have had a really nice graphics tablet.

brent_cox
brent_cox (#40)

I try not to troll the websites of the feckless and stupid, but I could not resist the link under the last one. Did you know there's gonna be a revolution? I hope it's televised.

hockeymom
hockeymom (#143)

Televised? Beck's gonna SPONSER that sucker!

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Thank you very much for the high honor you do to my humble blog, "The Freedom Fighter's Journal."

May I say in accepting this glorious honor that it is only honest, right and moral that I return the the racism and contempt Barack Obama has for his mother's white race by equal racism and conempt for his father's black race. Obama is the scum of the Earth - this is only way to treat the psychopathic racist.

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

*call me

KarenUhOh
KarenUhOh (#19)

I would like you to subscribe to your nooseletter.

Fredrick
Fredrick (#268)

YES MORE OF THIS! The Awl sometimes suffers from people making too much sense all the goddamn time. Ronbo's #2383 needs to be changed to a #1-in-heaven and stat.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Socialists like yourself have long rejected sense, reason and rational thinking. You are degenerate parasites who live off your betters. I pray for civil war so that the socialists can be terminated with extreme prejudice.

Tony
Tony (#2,386)

You Kant always get what you want.

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

Ronbo: You are totally missing an opportunity here. I linked over to you, sending this whole new stream of soft, pliable, suggestible brains to covert to your cause and you're turning them away! Maybe you should try something else, like appeal to their distrust of Islam....
http://ronbosoldier.blogspot.com/2009/12/muslim-student-it-is-fun-to-blow-people.html
Ooooooooooooooh. THERE YOU GO CHAMP!

slinkimalinki
slinkimalinki (#182)

well? it is fun to blow people. i don't see the problem with that.

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

@Abe: "misunderstander"

iplaudius
iplaudius (#1,066)

I am white, but I do not own a gun. What should I do? Please help.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Kill yourself by jumping off a tall building.

myfanwy
myfanwy (#1,124)

There are no tall buildings where I live. I blame the government for my inability to kill myself adequately.

Flashman
Flashman (#418)

Nothin but race traitors, socialists and faggots around here dude.

LondonLee
LondonLee (#922)

And Europeans!

Fredrick
Fredrick (#268)

Shh, don't scare him away! I'm crushing kind of hard. Don't tell him I'm an ethnic and sexual minority either. I want him to want ME FOR ME.

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

Haaaaiiii!!!

Flashman
Flashman (#418)

Oh yeah, plus Canadians. And Jews! Or are Jews ok, seeing as how some of them like to kill towelheads?

Ron Obvious
Ron Obvious (#351)

You are an absolute disgrace to the noble name of "Ron." On the positive side, you're also damn near incoherent. Let's see...what else? Oh, yeah, it's spelled "contempt," dickhead. Since most of the regulars here care about the quality of their posts, they immediately correct misspellings, grammatical errors and typos. Last part of your final sentence: "this is only way to treat the psychopathic racist." First, you need to put a definite article in front of "only." Let's see if you can figure out what a definite article is. Second, you get a gold star for psychological projection. Go back to Smolensk, khuy morshevye!

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Poor grammar and spelling? I put the blame where it rightly belongs - The socialist school system in the United States where students graduate from college and can't read their diplomas, but are well briefed on The Great Global Warming Hoax and how to use Trojans in sexual intercourse. BTW, I'm from Huntington, West Virginia originally - I would suggest you go back to Smolensk! I think you'll be more happy living under the last Stalinist regime in Europe.

paxcincinnatus

So, it is the government's fault that we aren't personally accountable for our own actions? I think that we've just gone down the rabbit hole.

Ron Obvious
Ron Obvious (#351)

I doubt your ill-education has anything to do with external factors.

cherrispryte
cherrispryte (#444)

Meh. Belarus is way more Stalinist than most parts of Russia, Smolensk included, at the moment. But good job taking an uneducated stab at international affairs!

And I for one would be thrilled for this "civil war" you adorably ignorant jackasses are planning. The central and southern parts of this country have been a drain on the financial, political, and intellectual resources of the rest of the country for far too long - you can even take Alaska with you! Go form your little Republic of Idiocracy and see how well that works out.

Mindpowered
Mindpowered (#948)

And take your carp with you.

The Dependent Clause

Weird! I was just this morning thinking that what the Awl needs more of is crazy racists.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

The Leftist definition of racism: Anyone who disagrees with Obama regardless of race, gender, religion, or sexual orientation.

lempha
lempha (#581)

The libertarian crowd overlaps with the Open Source crowd heavily, so all these 'Photoshops' were actually done in GIMP.

/notreally

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

I will not stand for the besmirching of Carl Gottlieb!

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

Needs more CAPS.

DorothyMantooth

Is "Ronbo" more like "Rambo" or "Ronco"?
Listicle please!

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

I was named "Ronbo" by the U.S. Secret Service. Why? This is a long story, however, the short version is that I'm very politically Incorrect and considered a dangerous radical. I'm rated "Class III" on their Watch List.

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

Ronald Gene, Are you still on about the Clinton thing? You know, if you martyr yourself by committing suicide one fundamental element to that martyrdom is that the suicide is not a hoax.

KarenUhOh
KarenUhOh (#19)

"Ronbo" is "Rambo" for people who rent movies from Popeil.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Thank you for the increase in traffic to my humble little blog and pointing out my Islamophobia. In fact, I'm a proud Islam hater! After 9/11 the USA should have went nuclear against the 57 Muslim nations of the world and wiped the 1.5 billion Muzzies off the face of the earth. The only good Muslim is a dead Muslim.

petejayhawk
petejayhawk (#1,249)

You said "have went."

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

I said it before I didn't say it!

slinkimalinki
slinkimalinki (#182)

ermmmm...if this is all it takes to make a notableincrease in your traffic...

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Well granted it didn't get the increase in traffic that Obama's naked mother received. Do you have the full frontal nudity ones of her? Those would bring a million hits an hour!

HeyThatsMyBike

EVEN KAREEM ABDUL-JABBAR?? He's the best!

HeyThatsMyBike

PS - Is this the same Muzzy? http://picnic.ciao.com/es/8750380.jpg

NeonTrotsky
NeonTrotsky (#2,249)

D'oh, you beat me to it. But who could want to nuke that adorable furry green alien?

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

"Ronald Gene, Are you still on about the Clinton thing? You know, if you martyr yourself by committing suicide one fundamental element to that martyrdom is that the suicide is not a hoax."

Yes, I did a little hoax a couple years ago as an experiment that did get quite a bit of attention on the Internet and almost broke out into the MSM, which was my goal; however, speaking of Big Lies, I do believe you Leftists have topped my little hoax with CLIMATEGATE - a 30 year plus hoax by a cabal of socialist scientists in Britain and the USA who cooked the books on AGW.

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

You're adorable.

NeonTrotsky
NeonTrotsky (#2,249)

But if you wipe Muzzy off the face of the earth, how will children learn foreign languages from poorly animated cartoon characters?

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

What if the Muzzies wipe all the Infidels off the planet, as they are commanded to do by Allah in Koran, how will the children learn any language but Arabic?

KarenUhOh
KarenUhOh (#19)

This is like that time Lyndon Larouche was supposed to make a cameo appearance on Laugh-In but couldn't read "Sock it to me?" off the cards.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

No it's like the time Obama give the wrong speech because it was on the teleprompter.

myfanwy
myfanwy (#1,124)

You mean the time when the Irish PM gave Obama's speech because it was on the teleprompter, and Obama corrected him.

HiredGoons
HiredGoons (#603)

This is performance art, right?

intelligentless

I'm Gaga for Ronco. I endorse mumbo-jumbo.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

You must be the new director of the DNC.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

I like to think of it as Art Performance.

Mindpowered
Mindpowered (#948)

A shared dedication to pointlessness.

JanHus
JanHus (#2,439)

How does one go about buying one or more of these posters. My boss is an ultra-fascist-liberal and we have "freedom of speech" bulletin board in our company and I would love to post these. I'll need more than one because he works late whenever someone posts something he doesn't and it's gone in the morning. Typical for a radical socialist!!!

Bohemond
Bohemond (#2,440)

Cherrispryte:
"The central and southern parts of this country have been a drain on the financial, political, and intellectual resources of the rest of the country for far too long "

Really?

Pop quiz:

1. Which large state has 12% of the nation's population, but over one-third of its welfare caseload?

2. Which other large state has 8% of the nation's population, but accounted for 48% of the nation's new jobs last year?

It seems the oh-so-smart blue states are the economic basket-cases, my friend. We'll get on much better without you and your leftist lunacies.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

Most importantly something like 80% of the all volunteer military comes from the South and West - mostly Republican states - So it could be argued that without the Johnny Rebs and Cowboys there wouldn't be much in the way of national defense.

Mindpowered
Mindpowered (#948)

Or just that deep and consistent poverty has left the military as one of the few viable options for even a little social mobility.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

"Or just that deep and consistent poverty has left the military as one of the few viable options for even a little social mobility."

Yet another case of a mind numbed robot Leftard believing his own propaganda. In fact, most military volunteers are from white middle class families and are better educated, more physically fit and rational thinkers. This in marked constrast to the average Northeastern Democrat voter who is likely to be a drug addicted black ghetto rat and felon who sells his vote to ACORN for a fix.

Mindpowered
Mindpowered (#948)

I know a trick question when I see one. There are no "Volunteers" any more.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

More importantly, I know the Emperor has no clothes.

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

Mr. Barbour, In all seriousness, never change. Your existence is like a one-man marketing campaign for registering new democrats. Big kiss.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

"Mr. Barbour, In all seriousness, never change. Your existence is like a one-man marketing campaign for registering new democrats. Big kiss."

Well Mr. Sauer, I do the best I can do with the recruitment of new Democommies as editor of my humble little blog! I mean anyone reading one of the many articles I post on Dear Leader Obama who happens to be a Republican will immediately go out and change to DemoRAT. After all, ACORN can only sign up Mickey Mouse so many times to gain votes for the Jackass Party. Speaking of Fearless Leader Obama - I understand Karl Rove has sent him a Christmas Card thanking him for raising Republican registration from 38% to 45% of the voting public. Hell's Bells Man! The GOP may elect a majority to Congress next year. Big Kiss back at you, Abe. One last question: Why does a nice Jewish boy like you support a political party and ideology that supports the destruction of Israel by the Muslims?

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

Much like how all your reasoning is terribly flawed at the most fundamental level, I am not Jewish. My name just happens to sound Jewish just as your happens to sound human.

Ronbo
Ronbo (#2,383)

So you Leftists think your opposition is subhuman? Rule number One of warfare: never underestimate your enemy. We Republicans are human, all too human. And card carrying members of the NRA. Beware the Ides of March, Caesar!

Maksim
Maksim (#2,573)

Abe, as creator of no less than six of the above posters, I’m puzzled and somewhat annoyed that you removed my name. I encourage free distribution of my work even if (as in your case) used as an opportunity to be snarky. However it would be nice if you wouldn’t crop my name off and perhaps a link to my website iMaksim.com
Thanks for nothing, Maksim

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

"Maksim": I would love to credit you. What's your real name?

And, I have never been to your website (until now). All of the above were found on message boards and other right-wing sites. I only removed a few site names so I think you have your comrades to blame for some of your lost credit. And in some cases, those sites had added their own tags. How could I know that the added website (yours or any others) was the source?

Maksim
Maksim (#2,573)

So you do admit it removing some. Tell me why you would do this?

Abe Sauer
Abe Sauer (#148)

I just did, above.

JanHus
JanHus (#2,439)

Is it possible to buy one of these posters? i.e. "Dumb and Dumber"

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