Friday, June 28th, 2013
24

Thoughts On Thoughts On Shorts

I tell you what: Take a good look at this ensemble and if you still can't bring yourself to conform to the official policy on shorts (they are fine for little boys but comical and embarrassing on grown men) then go make yourself look like a clown with my blessing.

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24 Comments / Post A Comment

beatrixkiddo1 (#2,988)

Every time my husband puts on shorts I ask him how he's enjoying his "boy clothes." Then I feel bad because he looks kinda sweaty in pants.

deepomega (#1,720)

I think there's a point, tho, where the shorts get so short that they circle around to something for only truly masculine dudes. Like 70s basketball players, or Aquaman.

jolie (#16)

But … the shorts are the only thing about that outfit that aren't stupid?

In the same way that one is less concerned about a hangnail when one's house is on fire, the beltloops without a belt and the tie tucked into the waistband are far too distracting for me to even discuss the shorts.

Similarly, any comments I might make on the bowlcut-and-beardburns combination would be injudicious at best.

FANTASTIC, MAN.

SidAndFinancy (#4,328)

@Gef the Talking Mongoose I really wanted to comment but shit my house is on fire again.

phels (#245,207)

First, do you actually think anyone would dress up like the dude in that picture? Dress shirt, tie, no belt and bowl cut? Second, you must not actually work for a living since you apparently have the luxury of putting "fashion" before practicality. It's hot outside and I'm not going to sweat (even more) all day just to align myself with some bourgeois creep's overly sensitive sense of aesthetics. Grow up.

Mr. B (#10,093)

Alex Balk, "bourgeois creep," told to "grow up" by first-time commenter.

@Mr. B : It's actually a required part of the sign-up process now.

I'd add that while wearing a necktie with short sleeves is probably the least egregious element of this ensemble, it's also highly self-beclowning.

ejcsanfran (#489)

I'd like that outfit a lot better if it were lying in a heap next to my bed.

Even Bermuda Business Attire shudders at that photo.

ejcsanfran (#489)

FWIW, the model's name is "Davey."

IBentMyWookie (#133)

@ejcsanfran Because of course.

@ejcsanfran : Not shown in photo : little elf shoes.

hockeymom (#143)

That is not fantastic. LIARS.

Sometimes I wear some longboard cut-offs that I make from my own elderly pants. But I do so in full knowledge–nay, in the glorious assumption–that it is entirely clownish.

KarenUhOh (#19)

Fuck shorts. Guy needs to shave. Starting with his knees.

BadUncle (#153)

Is there an official policy on men's capri pants?

KenWheaton (#401)

This is the equivalent of me posting some guy in high-water red pants (or pegged jeans) and a gingham shirt with thick-framed glasses and saying, "See? Pants? Ridiculous, right?"

IBentMyWookie (#133)

I'm just so proud of all of us for not commenting on his bulge.

We're really growing up, you guys.

@IBentMyWookie : That's actually a third little elf shoe.

He's not wearing a belt because he's Amish. Duh!

City_Dater (#2,500)

@Clarence Rosario

Which would be the only possible explanation for that haircut, so let's roll with it.

Lawks (#235,190)

I don't let anyone tell me what to wear unless they are paying me, and I just so happen to be rocking my bright green hot pants. I'll put on a belt before I go out though.

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