Football Pick Haikus For Week 13

Thursday, November 29

At Atlanta -3.5 New Orleans

Actual great game
on the NFL Network!
I’ll take that half point. PICK: SAINTS

Sunday, December 2


At Chicago – 3.5 Seattle

My heart says Seahawks
but my heart doesn’t really
make any money. PICK: BEARS

At Green Bay -8 Minnesota

Green Bay should play
angry after getting beat
down, but I like points. PICK: VIKINGS

San Francisco -7 At St. Louis

Last time these guys tied.
Which Niners’ quarterback will
get crushed by Rams’ rush? PICK: RAMS

At NY Jets -4.5 Arizona

Things are so bad for
the Jets that something has to
go their way for once. PICK: JETS

Carolina -3 At Kansas City

Only the crazy fans
of Kansas City can lift
Chiefs team to a push. PICK: CHIEFS

At Detroit -4.5 Indianapolis

Lions coach will find
some other new arcane way
to lose at football. PICK: COLTS

At Buffalo -5.5 Jacksonville

Chad Henne is my
new fantasy quarterback.
Yes, I’m in last place. PICK: JAGS

New England -7.5 At Miami

Pats usually choke a
game to the Dolphins yearly.
But I love Brady. PICK: PATS

Houston -6 At Tennessee

Schaub recovering
nicely from getting a stray
cleat to his red zone. PICK: TEXANS

At Denver -7 Tampa Bay

In the thin air of
Mile High Stadium pirates
get blown away. Arrr! PICK: BRONCOS

At Baltimore -8 Pittsburgh

Without Big Ben at
QB the Steelers are less
fun than Whitney’s show. PICK: STEELERS

At Oakland PK Cleveland

Browns haven’t had a road
win since Will and Grace were
secretly banging. PICK: BROWNS

Cincinnati -2.5 At San Diego

The Chargers are what
I think about to help me
stop an erection. PICK: BENGALS

At Dallas -10 Philadelphia

Neither team deserves
to be in games broadcast on
national TV. PICK: EAGLES

Monday, December 3

NY Giants -2.5 At Washington

The Pistol Offense
starring Griffin and Morris
stun sleeping Giants. PICK REDSKINS

Last week’s Haiku Picks went 9-6-1. That’s 82-91-4 for the season. Closing the gap!

Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.