Football Pick Haikus For Week 14
Thursday, December 8
At Pittsburgh -14 Cleveland
Is Colt McCoy the
Quarterback of the Future?
Then Browns' Future Sucks. PICK: BROWNS
Sunday, December 11
At Baltimore -16.5 Indianapolis
Baltimore only
shows up against the good teams.
This could be closer. PICK: COLTS
At Cincinnati -3 Houston
Bengals must win
and the Texans are starting
a third string QB. PICK: BENGALS
At Green Bay -11 Oakland
Everyone will play
the Packers tough from now on.
Pack will stay perfect. PICK: RAIDERS
At NY Jets -10 Kansas City
The Chiefs could play
major spoilers this weekend.
But they suck so bad. PICK: JETS

At Detroit -8 Minnesota
Lions' death spiral
will include a loss to the
purple grim reapers. PICK: VIKINGS
New Orleans -2.5 At Tennessee
Titans' Chris Johnson
has singlehandedly cost
me my fantasy league. PICK: SAINTS
At Miami -3 Philadelphia
The Dream Team turned out
to be all wet and not in
a fun kind of way. PICK: DOLPHINS

New England -8 At Washington
Two Redskins got
suspended for drug abuse.
Season up in smoke. PICK: PATRIOTS
Atlanta -2.5 At Carolina
The Falcons could be
so much better, but they are
like a moldy peach. PICK: PANTHERS

At Jacksonville PK At Tampa Bay
It's West versus East!
The Battle for Florida!
Tens of fans are psyched! PICK: Jaguars
San Francisco -4 At Arizona
The only Cardinal
anyone cares about is
J. Albert Pujols. PICK: 49ers

At Denver -3.5 Chicago
Chicago has no
Quarterback or running back.
Tebow will run wild. PICK: BRONCOS
At San Diego -7 Buffalo
The Gaslight District
of San Diego is kind of
like New Orleans Light. PICK: BILLS

At Dallas -3.5 NY Giants
The Giants almost
beat the Packers but almost
only counts in other things PICK: GIANTS
Monday, December 12
At Seattle -5.5 St. Louis
Move this game out of
Seattle and move it straight
to Football Hades. PICK: SEAHAWKS
Last week's Haiku Picks went 7-9. Season to date is 88-103-6.
Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.









If you ever come across a monkey made of cheese in reality, please send it to me so I can eat it out of effigy for The Packers. Not Perfect.
Clarification: the Florida Fail Bowl is at Jacksonville (unless PICK requires some weird notation that is unknown to me).
Also, the fact that the Bucs don't even have one point on the Jags warms my black (and gold) heart.
Football Hades? That's where Joey Harrington lives now, right?