Thursday, November 10th, 2011

Football Pick Haikus For Week 10

Thursday, November 10

At San Diego -7 Oakland
If Philip Rivers
throws one more pick he wins a
bowl of booger soup. PICK: RAIDERS

Saturday, November 12

Manny Pacquiao v. Juan Manuel Marquez III (9-1)
Not another tie!
After 12 Rounds they should go
to penalty kicks. PICK: MARQUEZ

Sunday, November 13

Pittsburgh -3 At Cincinnati
The Bengals look good
but just not as good as Troy
Polamalu's hair. PICK: STEELERS

At Kansas City -3 Denver
Tebow forgives sins.
Specifically the sin of
thinking he's sucky. PICK: CHIEFS

Jacksonville -3 At Indianapolis
If the Colts don't win
this weekend they won't win til
Autumn 2012. PICK: COLTS

At Dallas -5.5 Buffalo
Whatever happened
to Debbie who did Dallas?
I will Google her. PICK: BILLS

Houston -3 At Tampa Bay
Arian Foster.
Nothing else needs to be said.
Arian Foster. PICK: TEXANS

At Carolina -3.5 Tennessee
Cam Newton comes back
from the bye week to pilot
my fantasy team. PICK: PANTHERS

At Miami -4 Washington
The Dolphins would blow
Their chances at drafting Luck
with another dumb win. PICK: REDSKINS

At Atlanta PK New Orleans
This is secretly
pro football's best rivalry.
Falcons set to stun. PICK: FALCONS

At Chicago -3 Detroit
Bears will need some help
from Optimus Prime to stop
Megatron Johnson. PICK: LIONS

At Cleveland -2.5 St. Louis
Browns' QB Colt McCoy
needs a pair of Drew Carey's
corrective earwear. PICK: BROWNS

At Philadelphia -14 Arizona
Eagles are almost
as big a bummer as when
Mr. T killed Mickey. PICK: CARDINALS

Baltimore -6.5 At Seattle
Seattle has the
coolest public library
I have ever seen. PICK: RAVENS

At San Francisco -3.5 NY Giants
If you leave your heart
in San Francisco they will
bring it back for six. PICK: 49ers

At NY Jets -1.5 New England
Pats' 4th Quarter D
is as sad as the ending
of Good Will Hunting. PICK: JETS

Monday, November 14

At Green Bay -13.5 Minnesota
The Vikings can win
if the Packers forget they're
playing on Monday. PICK: VIKINGS

Last week's Haiku Picks went 10-4. Season to date is 61-70-3. Why do I keep betting on the Browns?

Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.

11 Comments / Post A Comment

Brunhilde (#1,225)

So what was the verdict on Debbie? I'd google her myself but I'm at work and don't need that on my browser history.

laurel (#4,035)

This is my favorite of these. And I say that as a Colts fan. (What? I <3 Dwight Freeney. And baby horses.)

Matt Langer (#2,467)

season's halfway point
sad that football ever ends
sadder these will, too

Off to a good start!

sharilyn (#4,599)

crisp weekend weather
punch drunk on fall and both
Jets and Niners win

You picked the Vikings I see
interesting brain
that selects the losing team

Flaneur (#998)

@Ranee Zaporski@twitter I believe he's picking vs. the spread here, so it's a bet that the Vikes will cover, not that they'll win. Which they sure won't.

Whoops! Glad that I misinterpreted this. I was starting to get worried about the writer. (Does Jim need better circulation in his apartment? Is he typing "all haiku and no play makes me a dull boy" over and over again at some old hotel in Colorado? ) But now I see that I just need to learn how to read.

Flaneur (#998)

@Ranee Zaporski@twitter Of course, we now know he was wrong even about that. They didn't come close to covering. Looked like a JV squad out there.

whizz_dumb (#10,650)

How did your Debbie who did Dallas googling go? I thought about it but I'm too shy.

elephony (#103,223)

How the people's fist
is going to lose to Marquez
is unclear to me.

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