Jeez, seems like God is calling everyone home today: “Robert Parker, the author of the popular Spenser novels about a hard-nosed Boston private investigator, has died. He was 77.” I absolutely devoured the Spenser books as a kid. It may have been the first grown-up mystery series I really got into. The show was what it was-and it was generally pretty faithful-but man, were those books ever great. Sad news.

The constabulary of Knifecrime Island are a busy lot, what with all the glassing and drunken yobbery. Still, there is plenty of other employment in which a felon can engage in that green and pleasant land. For instance: “A teenage mother was investigated by police after photographs of her six-month-old son with a cigarette in his mouth were posted on Facebook.” 18-year-old Rebecca Davey was grassed up by her friends, who saw the photo of Baby Ollie on her page. Still, all’s well that ends well.

Essex police visited Rebecca’s home in Southend, Essex, but said there were ‘no immediate concerns’ for the child’s welfare. Social services also made inquiries.

Rebecca then declared her love for her son, writing: ‘Why Would SomeOne Do That To Me U Ollie No was taking U Yur Mine for lyfee Darlinggg Mummy Loves You :)’

My mom didn’t let me smoke until I was 13. Clearly, this is a woman who does indeed love her child.

“And here we have yet another reason for scientists to love this movie. Who has not tired of seeing scientists portrayed as either grant-greedy maniacs or naïve dangers to humanity, shouting ‘I’m sure the creatures are friendly!’ just before being devoured? In films, scientists are often assumed to be inhuman to some degree, and if they become more human as a film proceeds, it is by becoming less of a scientist.”
-Carol Kaesek Yoon writes a nice piece about watching Avatar from scientist’s perspective. “I felt as if someone had filmed my favorite dreams,” she says. There’s nothing hotter than a scientist all gushy and weak-in-the-knees.

Out Today: Spoon, “Transference”

I’m of the opinion that Spoon is flat out the best rock band in America, but I am still warming up to their new one. Reviewing it for Pitchfork, Awl contributor Matthew Perpetua says, “Following the creative strides made on their last few Merge releases, the only big surprise on Transference is that they’ve become willing to let their hair down a bit. It can be a bit of a let down if you come in expecting another blockbuster like Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga, but something of a revelation if you meet them halfway.” So I guess I’ll try that!

This Bill Cunningham video, on THE BIGGEST FASHION DISCOVERY OF THE MODERN AGE, is actually quite convincing!

“All the top women we see in this list are pretty well behaved and respectable women. We don’t see a lot of them parading around in public unless it is in the framework of their careers.” That’s Montreal-based AskMen.com editor-in-chief James Bassil, on the his site’s naming Entourage’s Emmanuelle Chriqui the winner of this year’s “Top 99 Most Desirable Women” poll. Last year’s winner, Megan Fox, came in at no. 11. Rounding out the list are 97 other women, a large percentage of which have contracts with Victoria’s Secret.

Cooking the Books, with Emily Gould, was shot and edited by Val Temple. In this episode: Jami Attenberg eats some dangerously undercooked meat to celebrate the publication this week of The Melting Season (buy it here!), the story of a married woman who leaves her life in Nebraska for Las Vegas.

(Previously: Obsolete Methods of Making Cookies and Popcorn with Anna Jane Grossman.)

Sad news from the world of feline transport: “A cat which became famous in Britain for riding on the buses around the southern English city of Plymouth has died after being run over, media reported.” 12-year-old Casper “would habitually leave [his owner’s] home, trot across the street to the bus stop, wait his turn in line and board the bus. He even had a favorite seat — in the middle of the aisle — where he would sit until he was ready to get off.” Drivers on the route would regularly let the cat off at his stop. “Casper touched many people’s lives and clearly had a very exciting life traveling around Plymouth and who knows where else. I suspect he’s now exploring heaven and is telling all the other cats up there about the many adventures he had,” said a spokesperson for the bus company.

Hundreds of “solar-powered audible Bibles that can broadcast the holy scriptures in Haitian Creole to 300 people at a time” have been dispatched to Haiti. You see, God powers them, through his brother, the sun, and then people turn the cranks when they want to crank up the word of God to everyone in a two-block radius. Then the talking bible tells everyone to “eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood” and everyone turns into vampires. I think.

The stock market “thinks” that Republican Scott Brown is likely to win Senator Ted Kennedy’s vacated seat.