Posts Tagged: Weather

Summer in Siberia

One thing they never get right in the movies is that right before the Bad Thing happens, when it's clear that something is starting to go wrong, real people usually just laugh. Nervous chuckles and low speech, then screams, as the sky begins to fall. Unless you're in Siberia! In which case the laughing never quite stops. [Via]


Skies Troubled

This time lapse video of a storm in Dallas conveys both the overwhelming awe one feels when confronted by the majesty of nature and the overwhelming joy one feels about not being anywhere near Dallas. [Via]


Oh Boy, Snow

Update: Light snow, on & off until 1pm then clearing skies move in. This is the 8th time that we've had snow this month

— NY1 Weather (@NY1weather) February 26, 2014

Look, I know at this point we are all tired of winter, and the fact that it is freezing and there's still snow right now and more snow in our future—even as March is so close that we are already coming up with excuses to cancel on the plans we halfheartedly agreed to earlier in the month—is at the very least disheartening if not downright depressing, it is important for us to remember that life is terrible, [...]


Everything Is Broken

The ground beneath your feet is pitted and wrecked, the mighty towers in which you took so much pride rain death down on the heads of those passing below, and yet another massive storm wends its way toward your desolate environs. Look upon the ruin that you call your city and despair, New York. This is what happens when you let the Democrats back into Gracie Mansion.


Meteorologists Are Blowing Wind Up Your Ass

"The truth about 'wind chill': Does it even really exist?"


Weather Crazy

If you were awake at 5 a.m. because, say, you were caught in the great airline horrors of the snow times followed by the JFK Delta plane skidding off the runway times, which closed down that airport and sent a ripple effect of delays and cancellations across the country, you would have seen the bizarre sight of New York City gripped in a low-lying fog. It was rather twinkly and luxurious actually! Or if you are awake now, this morning, perhaps you have seen the nutzo downpour, with the tornado-green sky over Manhattan and the deep grey over Brooklyn, trash and bottles flying and umbrellas breaking everywhere. But it gets [...]


Weatherman: Thanksgiving Eve Superstorm Will Bring The Utter Destruction Of All American Travel Plans And Dreams

Overnight GFS model says 'just kidding', lashes NYC with T'gvng-eve nor'easter. My thoughts:

— Eric Holthaus (@EricHolthaus) November 22, 2013

Expect heavy rain from Dallas->Atlanta->DC->NYC->Boston the day before Thanksgiving #badtiming

— Eric Holthaus (@EricHolthaus) November 22, 2013

America's weather-predicting boyfriend and repentant airplane user Eric Holthaus came out with a doozy this morning that'll rock your holidays: a foot of snow maybe, the day before Thanksgiving, give or take, hurricane force winds on the Eastern seaboard, general mayhem, rain across half the country, people eating each other alive in airports, turkeys brined in grandmothers' tears.


Winter Is Over

Yesterday, the temperature in New York City reached eighty-one degrees Fahrenheit; it will not dip below fifty degrees again this week. We are pleased to announce that winter, which began sometime in November, has finally come to a close after six long months.

Spring will be vanishingly brief. It occurred during the first paragraph of this post. The sticky season is already upon us, and it will be thick and unforgiving and last an age. The grim ecological consequences of global warming aside, this is worth celebrating: New York City is at its best when everyone is slightly miserable, hardly dressed, glistening and surrounded by [...]


Here Is Why It Might Not Be Cold For The Rest Of Our Lives

"On March 20th, this year's equinox, the northern hemisphere—our part of the Earth—starts tilting close to the sun. That fact alone means it has to warm up." —It is horrifying on every level that we need to have a "news" story like this, but perhaps the most horrifying part of all is just how comforting I'm finding it.


You're Gonna Get Wet

"Due to the amount of snow on the ground, warming temperatures and rain, Greater New Yorkers face a new set of winter hazards on Thursday. These will come from above and below in the form of black ice, slushy street corner puddles and chunks of snow and ice falling from buildings." —Yes, you will probably be soaked by some form of solidified moisture as you wend your way through town today, but just remember the classic New York City adage "If it isn't jizz, go about your biz" and keep moving. (Unless it is, in fact, jizz, in which [...]


Can You Guess What The Weather Is Going To Be Like This Week?

"It will get down to the teens tonight and stay cold through Wednesday. Then comes another storm. If it dumps snow, it could bring 10 inches. If it’s rain, it could be the most we’ve had since December. If it’s something in between, it will be a huge drag." —I saw a weather forecast at the end of last week that ended with, "March 1st is only 3 weeks away!" So that's where we are. The prophecy was true. When the most optimistic thing the weather people can [...]


Outlook Calls For "Slightly Less Wanting To Die"

Extended: Tuesday-Wednesday: Another Deep Freeze. Highs, mostly in teens. Thursday-Friday: Less harsh. High near 32.

— NY1 Weather (@NY1weather) January 26, 2014

Do not be fooled by the current conditions outdoors: like all good things they are ethereal and serve only to remind you just how transient happiness is in even its most relative state. No, this short spate of temperatures that could be best described as "not freezing" will swiftly give way to the resumption of the perpetual cold under which we have been crushed since what seems like time immemorial. But there is good news on the horizon: the week's end will find us in a [...]


Weather, There Will Be Some

I have been trying to find any kind of upside in the coming onslaught of weekend snow and rain but the only thing I can come up with is that it will at least make things a little more unpleasant for the battery of urinating Santa kids flooding in from Paramus and Ronkonkoma. I guess that's something.



From NY1 Weather. NYC storm threat this afternoon includes the potential for tornado. This is a precautionary "watch" only.

— Pat Kiernan (@patkiernan) October 7, 2013

Screw you, Kiernan, I want to panic about the weather and I wanna do it now! Stop being so goddamn rational.


Extremely Wet New Yorkers To Become Even More Annoying Online For Next 48 Hours

It begins this afternoon around 2 p.m.

It ends Thursday at noon.

So set your "New York is the weather-complaining center of the world" social media presences at their loudest settings, for you will be wet and miserable and cold, and how can the rest of the world compete with that?


But Wait, There's More

Okay, so the bad news is that we are looking at what could potentially be 8 inches or more of snow from Sunday night into early Monday evening. Even if that amount ends up being substantially less, temperatures will continue to remain lower than usual for the foreseeable future. The frigid weather will serve as a constant reminder that the world is cold, empty and meaningless. The sun will rise and then set and the darkening sky will settle in as you huddle beneath a blanket on your couch, the glare of the television screen the only light in your life, the [...]


It's Time To Admit That This Winter Will Never Get Better

"A Saturday storm will dump 4 to 6 inches of snow over New York City, according to the National Weather Service. The precipitation will clear up by Sunday afternoon, but is expected to cause delays at airports." Even the [...]


Up Next: Snow

"Central Park received 8 inches (20 centimeters) yesterday, a record for the date…. Snow will start falling across Boston and New York again later today, the National Weather Service said. Freezing rain and sleet will join the mix later tomorrow…. New York is expected to get anywhere from 4 to 8 inches, with northern parts of Manhattan and the Bronx seeing the most, said Joe Pollina, a weather service meteorologist in Upton, on New York’s Long Island. 'It’ll start off as all snow, everywhere, and then change over to freezing rain between 4 a.m. and 5 a.m. through the morning,' Pollina said…. [...]


Light Drizzle Predicted For New York

We did not know to call it Day One at the time. Only later, working our way backwards, we saw this was the day when it began. We were huddled inside. We'd purchased all the prepackaged naan bread at the deli. The expensive deli, not the cheap one. We had milk, coffee, books. Winter had been something of a joke so far.

The Internet still worked back then and Weather Dot Com named the coming storm "Anus" for some reason. Most people laughed and went to work.

Most of them wouldn't make it home again. A curtain of frozen dust began to fall from the sky, fine enough to [...]


Oh My God This Weather Etc.

from @NY1Weather: 61 degrees at 8 am was today's #NYC high temperature. We drop to the 40s this afternoon.

— Pat Kiernan (@patkiernan) November 27, 2013

You're not crazy, the weather is absolutely baffling. I mean, you are crazy, but it has nothing to do with the weather, it is just the constant beat of anxiety running through your brain: they're going to figure out I'm worthless, everything I do will go wrong, I was never any good, all I am to other people is a disappointment, etc.—all that stuff, apart from being true, is what's making you crazy, because of the way it continually loops [...]