What Will Our Easily-Influenced Rubes Eat Next?

Will one of these items capture the particular combination of culinary gimmickry and inexplicable desirability that turns it into the next ludicrous obsession which even people whose friends refer to them as “foodies” without derision will stand on line through inclement weather for hours to procure simply so they can broadcast their consumption on Instagram or Twitter, thus somehow providing themselves with a temporary respite from the constant crushing concern that their lives lack any value or meaning? I dunno, probably.#