Internet: There is still plenty of time to consider not posting that hilarious April Fools’ Day prank you’ve been working so hard on.
— Jason Santa Maria (@jasonsantamaria) March 18, 2014
This man is right. There is nothing funny you can do for April Fools’ Day and even if you think you are somehow special or you’ve come up with the one exception that when properly executed will actually make people change their opinions about the humor of April Fools’ Day gags you’re not and you haven’t and seriously go fuck yourself because April Fools’ Day bits are the worst and they first make us all feel bad for the people who try them and then ultimately for ourselves, the people we love, our entire species and everything else that has to share the planet with us. Nothing about them has value. Just don’t.