Monday, December 10th, 2012
12

Slate Takes a Crap on Your Monday Morning

It's a perfectly reasonable Monday morning, people are going about their business, and blammo, Slate comes and makes a huge filthy mess of it with their bizarre ramblings about grapefruit. It's just not right.

12 Comments / Post A Comment

Joe MacLeod (#22)

Right? Jeez, all you gotta do is put sugar on it.

@Joe MacLeod And get a grapefruit spoon. Who doesn't like feeling all fancy using a special utensil for their breakfast in the morning?

@happymisanthrope But grapefruit spoons don't exist(!!), the author says, because she apparently has no access to Google: https://www.google.com/search?q=Grapefruit+spoon

lbf (#2,343)

Solution: peel the dang thing and eat it. Man why you even got to do a thing.

mooseketeer (#239,282)

@lbf In some British period movie I saw once, there was a lady who ate an orange like a grapefruit- with a knife and fork sliced in half and covered in sugar. It was at that moment I vowed to never be so ridiculous about a grapefruit again. They are plenty sweet, just eat it.

Amasa Amos (#9,654)

Grapefruit is trying to kill you because it stops you from metabolizing Lipitor? Sounds like grapefruit is saving your ass.

I think we're all on the same page here, but I want to go further: the Ruby Red grapefruit is to the real grapefruit as a Cosmo is to Bourbon. Put on the goggles and go to work. A real grapefruit is a straight up gangsta breakfast.

deepomega (#1,720)

More like FAKEfruit.

Brunhilde (#1,225)

"1. It’s impossible to eat."

I feel so accomplished now. I've achieved the impossible so many times!

It is a bad fruit but definitely not the worst. But then again I grew up with grapefruit spoons and tangerine dreams.

Ham Snadwich (#11,842)

You think you might like a thing, but you are doing it wrong.

I love the way it smells and it goes well with vodka so it is really the ideal breakfast food.

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