Did you have a happy adolescence? Of course you didn’t. You have a brain, don’t you? It didn’t take you long to realize the futility and suffering of existence, did it? Well, guess what? “UK researchers say the first in-depth investigation of whether youthful happiness leads to greater wealth in later life reveals that, even allowing for other influences, happy adolescents are likely to earn more money as adults.” The happy idiots win again. Life is just unrelenting gloom, isn’t it? Plus you’re poor.