Wednesday, October 17th, 2012
17

The "Cool Kids" Throw a Gross "Tech Homecoming" Party for Straight People

WE'RE ALL SORRY CASSIE
Tech Homecoming is happening next month! That's right, it's just like homecoming in high school, with football, a dance and a homecoming court: "The 2012 Homecoming court brings together 8 guys and 8 girls as representatives of the New York Tech & Media community. Homecoming court is selected by a panel of over 30 judges based on impact to the community, networks, and general likeability. One guy and one girl will be voted king and queen at the homecoming dance." They will vote on people! Like who is the "best dressed" and who is the "most eligible"!

Straight people: what is wrong with them? (Also, hey, look at that, at least eight women in tech consented to being called "girls.") So you want to relive your high school glory days? Great, the rest of us—the sluts, burn-outs, goths and, right, the BROWN PEOPLE AND HOMOS AND OUR GOOD FRIENDS THE FATTIES—will all meet outside and smoke joints and throw water balloons at you. See you there, Heathers.

17 Comments / Post A Comment

NinetyNine (#98)

Do I even need to check to see if Sklar is a nominee?

Matt (#26)

STATUS: TURBO LOVER

Matt (#26)

Why did Artie remove his De La Soul post? IS SOMEONE BULLYING YOU, ARTIE? CALL THE POLICE!

jolie (#16)

Here's a helpful chart for the tech world to print out and enjoy!

Boys : Girls :: Guys : Gals :: Ladies : Gentlemen :: Women : Men

jolie (#16)

but also and whispery because I hate to argue with the excellent overall point being made here: aren't brown people, in this case, going to be on the inside? Something something sub-continent something something brie naan?

hman (#53)

I'm brown and gay but I don't wear khakis. No awards for me.

BadUncle (#153)

So the Computer Club wants to finally win this thing?

jfruh (#713)

"NY TECH MVP 2012: Mayor Bloomberg"

LO…L?

cherrispryte (#444)

"the sluts, burn-outs, goths and, right, the BROWN PEOPLE AND HOMOS AND OUR GOOD FRIENDS THE FATTIES"

WE CALL THIS PANDERING TO YOUR BASE.

I mean, they're ALL sluts, right?

Aatom (#74)

I can't make this, sorry. I'm taking The Awl 5-day Gay Party Cruise out of Puerto Vallarta. Lots of brown people expected! (Not as many goths.)

Pierce (#3,939)

I don't think I know what "Tech" means.

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