The Definitive List Of White Music Stolen By Black People

Last week, Onion A.V. Club writer Noel Murray complained about the trend of people rejecting things—food, films, music—as being “for white people.” “The ‘white people are square and bland’ gag is an old one, and for the most part, it’s both harmless and healthy,” Murray wrote. “But increasingly, people aren’t sniping about ‘whiteness’ to be funny, or even defiant—at least not entirely. They’re using the term as a form of criticism, meant to be dismissive. … ‘That sounds like music for white people,’ is another way of saying, ‘That can’t be any good.’ And I do have a problem with that.”

To some degree, we trio of black people agrees with Murray—white people aren’t always lame. In fact, studies show that only about 35 percent of the white population is hopelessly uncool, compared to 27 percent of the black population.

To promote a more perfect harmony between blacks and whites, we’ve put together a list of music taken by black musicians from white musicians. While we’re confident this list won’t eliminate all the racial tension currently dividing America, we hope it lends some credence to Murray’s protestations about white stuff being written off as boring. As you can tell from looking below, that’s simply not the case. White people: Frequently not as dull as you might think.

TRY A LITTLE TENDERNESS

Bing Crosby To Otis Redding

ALL ALONG THE WATCHTOWER

Bob Dylan To Jimi Hendrix

STILLNESS IS THE MOVE

Dirty Projectors To Solange

BLAME IT ON THE BOOGIE

Michael “Mick” Jackson To Michael Jackson

(Note: We’ve broken this into pages solely to keep from breaking anyone’s browser.)