Good news! I ran into a bunch of married Brooklyn dads last night (in Manhattan, of course), who weren’t so happy about our thoughts on how the real estate needs of their upcoming divorces are going to destroy whole swaths of gentrified Brooklyn.
But the disgruntled dads did bring up something obvious I hadn’t considered. What do you think the likely behavior of a bunch of 40-something dadvorcé’s will be? That’s right: dadcaves. They’re not going to live on their own when they get divorced, thereby hogging all the apartments. They’re going to all be roomies! They’ll form packs of bro households, with a high-up wet bar that the kids can’t reach and a Wii in every room. A Frankies cookbook in every kitchen! It’ll be their third boyhood! This, at least, will keep the housing market from being completely flooded by the forthcoming Brooklyn divorce wave. Plus, they’re all going to be living in the new Crown Heights, after it’s gentrified, anyway. That’s too bad, because do you know how hard it is to get from the 3 train to the F train? Commuting from daddy’s Brodown Palace to Mommy’s Lil’ Yoga Retreat in Carroll Gardens is going to be horrible for Parsnip and Carrot, the sad hipster twins of divorce.
(Also obviously: the gay dadvorcé—you know, the ones who were bi and then married a woman and then started dating men again after the divorce—will just move back to Manhattan.)