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Don't Pay Attention To The Moon This Weekend
This Saturday, at 11:34 PM, the moon is going to be all, "Hey, look at me, I'm so big! Come on, look at me!" I suggest we all stay indoors and ignore it, hurting its feelings so badly that it never comes by again. Suck it, stupid moon! Nobody cares about you!
And with Newt Gingrich out of the race, those precious, precious moon colonies are just that much further out of reach.