Tuesday, January 10th, 2012
7

Misguided Science Types Somehow Convinced Moon Worth Preserving

Oh, by all means, let's try and preserve all the VALUABLE HISTORY on the moon. It's SO IMPORTANT that all the footprints and garbage we left up there on previous visits remain intact. Lord knows the moon can't do anything for itself, because it's so USELESS. Ugh, stupid moon! Don't you know it's not going to make a difference once we finally come to our senses and blow you into little tiny chunks of utter worthlessness?

7 Comments / Post A Comment

Mr. B (#10,093)

I could cut the sexual tension with a knife.

dntsqzthchrmn (#2,893)

@Mr. B Or a bear paw. A severed bear paw.

C_Webb (#855)

Just do what every other rarely-visited museum does, and put some fierce blue haired retiree at the front desk who will follow everyone around while pretending to be feather dusting.

deepomega (#1,720)

@C_Webb Flashbacks to the Museum of Independent Telephony in Abilene, Kansas.

Balk should just think of the moon as convenient reminder that time is ticking slowly away and that everything we do is meaningless.

BadUncle (#153)

I hate to sound like a nay-saying naybob of negativism, but wouldn't the destruction of the moon force humanity's evolution into two distinct tribes: one aggressive subterranean race of psychic cannibals, and the other surface dwelling, child-like and delicious?

whizz_dumb (#10,650)

The moon is not useless. It is responsible for the ferociousness of the sea and human hormone cycles, which we all know is the true root of all evil (money shmoney). Therefore, the moon is obviously where the Devil resides and needs to be blown the fuck up. So I agree with the solution but for different reasons.

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