Tuesday, July 12th, 2011

Science Says Totally Bogus Thing About Alcohol

Science, you ungrateful, backstabbing sonofabitch! After everything I've done to get your name out there in front of the public, this is how you're going to treat me? I thought we were FRIENDS, Science! I have never felt so betrayed in my life. It's OVER.

12 Comments / Post A Comment

boyofdestiny (#1,243)

There's got to be a "Women Contemplating Wine Labels" photo essay to be put together, right? Is the Hairpin on this?

@boyofdestiny If Edith's too busy crafting original content to have done this and you want a poor man's version, which you surely don't, check out NYMag's site. The recent assemblage of photos of Obama laughing, posts about wacky countries, and tags ("It's Science"), in addition to the two 'thumbs up!' your comment received, lead me to believe such piece is imminent.

dntsqzthchrmn (#2,893)

"Imagine how well Jesus might have done."

I would like someone to make a collage of all the Daily Mail's headlines RE alcohol and health. It's like their target market is goldfish and the mentally impaired.

Tully Mills (#6,486)

"French researchers."

'there is no level of alcohol consumption for which cancer risk is null.'

Researchers also found there is no level of human existence for which cancer risk is null.

Niko Bellic (#1,312)

@Clarence Rosario There is no level of blog reading for which the risk of running into something so incredibly stupidly blown out of proportion that it nerves you up enough to increase the risk of cancer by more than null is null.

whizz_dumb (#10,650)

There's nothing I can benefit from reading beyond that mumbo-jumbo headline, besides continued skepticism/denial.

Aloysius (#1,808)

@whizzard. Today I understand deniers of global warming.

whizz_dumb (#10,650)

@Aloysius that analogy is better the more I think about it. I ain't changing my ways for health's/Earth's sake cuz there is nothing wrong.

(not your headline, Alex, I was benefited with laughter from that and the words under it)

Aatom (#74)

so my plan to kill whatever annoying bug I picked up that won't let me swallow with several martinis is still kosher, though, right?

SeanP (#4,058)

Science is still your friend, Balk. Science "journalism": not so much. Yes, your risk of cancer goes up slightly with moderate alcohol consumption. But your heart attack risk goes down substantially. Net result: drink up.

Post a Comment