NYC's Greatest Commish Helps You Smell the Flowers, Poop
New York City's greatest administrator, Parks & Rec Commish Adrian Benepe, has folded or wadded in the face of the bizarre Coney Island toilet-paper rationing disaster. (Workers or their superiors took it upon themselves to ration out toilet-paper.) Today Benepe comes out swinging: "It's our business to help New Yorkers do theirs." THAT'S GOOD STUFF. As we have noted before at length, Benepe is responsible for much of the recent beautification of New York City. For instance, did you go down to the Hudson last night for the fireworks? (Surely you did, because apparently everyone was there, it looked like Cloverfield on the way home, with people scrambling over barricades on the closed-off West Side Highway.) Perhaps you passed a bucolic, flower-crammed scene such as this one, spotted in the low west 90s. You can thank Adrian Benepe! No, go on, you selfish schmuck, thank him.
This the same Adrian Benepe that's turning Manhattan's streets into pedestrian plazas and making it illegal to smoke in them? That guy?
@KenWheaton Nope, the pedestrian plazas are DOT, Janet Sadik-Khan, smoking I'm guessing is Health.
@Chris Confessore@twitter Ah. Good to know. I'll shut up now.
@KenWheaton Certainly not telling you to shut up :) Just being informative.
Nice Things, Fireworks, toilet paper, Flowers
Cool late-90s Kim Gordon lyrics?
The last word of your headline could use some disambiguation as to whether it's intended as a noun or a verb.
Eating 62 hotdogs and then being issued two squares of toilet tissue is the stuff of Coney Island nightmares. Along with the rest of Coney Island, come to think of it.