Thursday, July 28th, 2011

AIDS Benefit Gets Terrible, (Delightfully) Mean Review

They say you mellow as you age. And yet, this is likely the single cattiest dispatch Bob Morris has yet filed for the Times in his many [redacted] years. "Nearby, under a gnarled old tree, a black granite gravestone for one of the host’s dogs had been littered with empty wineglasses. "


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That entire article is pure awesomeness. And the last line! GOLD.

hockeymom (#143)

@Gef the Talking Mongoose
Bob Morris IS the Honey Badger.

hockeymom (#143)

Wow. Two bits from the article:

“Does this have onion in it?” a horrified Helen Lee Schifter asked about a miniature taco hors d’oeuvres she was eating. A waiter said yes, and she dropped it as if it were full of lively maggots. “Not at cocktail parties!”

"Like Lady Gaga fans, guests can be little monsters, too."

Bob Morris gives no quarter.

jolie (#16)

The mention of Helen Lee Schifter reminds me of something I decided over the weekend: Spirit Animals are out. Spirit Socialites are in.

I call dibs on Sunny von Bulow.

@jolie : Instead of fantasy football, do Fantasy Garden Party. Do you build a Championesses of Causes team, or do you go for the classic Bitchy Literary formation? Top-heavy on Glamourpuss Tabloid-Fodder or Old Money Duchesses? Personally, I'm trading Peggy D’uzes for C.Z. Guest in the second round, but if Caroline Blackwood opens up as a free agent I am ALL OVER THAT ACTION

Kevin Knox (#4,475)

@jolie Nan Kempner, please!

jolie (#16)

@Gef the Talking Mongoose I'm OBSESSED with this idea.

@jolie : It rates at least a Tumblr, if not a fullblown seat on the startup bus. You know where to find me.

Also: fashion designer fighting game! (Karl Lagerfeld gets M. Bison's moveset.)

gregorg (#30)

He had me at "said one guest, Erika Faust, a dentist from Queens."

queensissy (#1,783)

What – no love yet for

"…told some friends that his wife, Sessa von Richthofen, wore Spanx. She looked alarmed. 'No, I don’t — you do,' she snapped at him."

? Bob Morris is channeling some Truman Capote or something.

Kevin Knox (#4,475)

@queensissy Or Bret Easton Ellis without all the torture. Well, physical torture anyway.

Calvin Klein isn't renovating Dragon's Head. He tore the old house down a few years ago and is building something new.

@Stephenson Billings : I'll be sure to let Bob know.

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