Thursday, June 16th, 2011

Man Takes Expensive Leak

"It’s really an unfortunate incident that probably could have been avoided if he had just chosen a bush," says Portland, OR, police spokeman Pete Simpson. He is referring to 21-year-old Joshua Seater's decision to urinate into a local reservoir. "By daylight, the Water Bureau decided to drain eight-million gallons of water to the tune of $32,700 tax payer dollars." (The reservoir supplies residents with drinking water.) It is unclear what punishment, if any, Seater will face, but I'm pretty sure no one will ever pee in this reservoir again. No way. People are gonna do things that are MUCH WORSE.


13 Comments / Post A Comment

saythatscool (#101)

Because a bird never shit in that thing?

BadUncle (#153)

@saythatscool Yeah, and like fish aren't fucking in that water right now.

boyofdestiny (#1,243)

@BadUncle Beavers do their business in that water.

Consonants (#7,953)

Heh, this story and the preceding poopburger story are quite the one-two punch…

Hello Officer.

HiredGoons (#603)

He just pissed that money away.

iantenna (#5,160)

this is the dumbest thing i've ever heard. don't they treat the shit out of that water (literally) after it leaves the reservoir? i spent a significant amount of my high school years getting stoned and skinny dipping in marin county reservoirs. i'm not saying i ever peed in them but, I TOTALLY PEED IN THEM.

deepomega (#1,720)

@iantenna: This explains a lot about Marin County.

riggssm (#760)

@iantenna I allegedly may not have done some of those same things, as in both of them. I was drunk though, not stoned.

hman (#53)

I've gotta start watching "Portlandia."

ep (#8,509)

People should not be urinating in reservoirs, particularly in the hours before a massive $23.2 million Water Bureau ask by incredibly immature, opportunistic, cynical and corrupt city government officials. Otherwise expect to become a player in the disproportionate-public-health-scare political stunt that follows.

You missed the most important urination news of the day:
Professor accused of urinating on colleague's door now wanted man

Ham Snadwich (#11,842)

It's probably a finished water reservoir; which means it's already chlorinated and treated, so no fish fuckery. Most cities either are covering them or replacing with tanks.

Also draining a reservoir for a quart of piss in 8 million gallons is ridiculous.

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