Tuesday, June 14th, 2011
20

Englishman Impervious To Glassing

Actor Sean Bean, out having a drink with "a topless model" (who was, presumably, clothed at the time) this weekend in London, was punched and stabbed with what is believed to be broken glass by an unknown assailant who made "lewd" comments about the model. In the course of defending her honor, Bean sustained injuries to his arm and face. "Despite his wounds, Bean refused medical attention and opted not to go to a hospital. Instead, the actor kindly accepted a first aid kit from the bar staff, then ordered another drink." [Related: Stormy Monday is a really underrated movie. Even Sting is good in it. Sting!]

20 Comments / Post A Comment

roboloki (#1,724)

it gets worse. sunday he got his fucking head cut off.

gumplr (#66)

@roboloki

but Hurley survived, right?

sharilyn (#4,599)

This will really not surprise anyone who has seen even one episode of 'Game of Thrones'.

MParcells (#375)

@sharilyn True. Related, was the glasser a twelve year old blond kid?

Clare (#516)

@MParcells Geoffrey Baratheon is the ruler of the house of Dipshit.

Werner Hedgehog (#11,170)

"This is for Sharpe's Rifles, Bean!"

STABBITY-STAB

Rosebud (#4,107)

@Werner Hedgehog Awww, you didn't like Sharpe's Rifles?!

sigerson (#179)

WINTER IS COMING

MollyculeTheory (#4,519)

You stupid bastard, you've got no arms left.

cherrispryte (#444)

Dear Sean Bean,

Please stop being so badass and attractive. I can't take it anymore.

Love and Lollipops,
CherriSpryte

Astigmatism (#1,950)

A classmate of mine in (UK) public school, after punching through one of those wire-latticed shatter-proof plate glass doors, to the school nurse, with probably three or four wires and some potato-chip-sized pieces of glass still embedded his arm: "Any chance I can be good for my rugby match in an hour?"

English people is bonkers.

sigerson (#179)

@Astigmatism – is that a "public school" in the English sense of the word (privately funded and exclusive) or in the American sense of the world (government-funded and open to all)?

Astigmatism (#1,950)

@sigerson: Very much the English, Roald Dahl sense of the word.

I always pictured Mr. Bean as being a little more hapless.

cinetrix (#47)

@Balk Stormy Monday! Gah, every so often you remind me why we're friends. And I'm pretty sure it's currently streaming on Netflix. [It is!]

@cinetrix You know you're in the tank for Stormy Monday when you have the soundtrack (with the Figgis cuts and all). Krakov Jazz Ensemble, Weegee's, New Ulm! all of it good. But the best? Sting's fucking BASS SOLO (1:14 for those who are streaming, although the aspect ratio is messed up)

Senor_Wences (#2,234)

"Stormy Monday" is the best. Everybody go watch it right now. America Days! That Polish jazz band! Tommy Lee Jones! Yes, Sting actually quite good! Go figure!

But I'm sad to report that http://www.melaniegriffith.com seems to be gone. The Magic Door is no more.

Sean Bean stabbed in face? How could they tell?

raincoaster (#628)

Why has nobody mentioned he was in Lady Chatterley's Lover? Guess what part he played…

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