Wednesday, June 22nd, 2011
21

Adjectives Collected From Six Reviews Of The New Bon Iver Album

A..V. Club (A-)
• plaid-clad
• mountain-man
• wintry
• oft-told
• cabin-bound
• warm
• billowy
• bigger
• slicker
• stranger
• indulgent
• pretty
• prettier
• grander
• layered
• adventurous
• irreverent
• resplendent
• irony-straddling
• smooth
• expansive
• spacey
• elusive
• formless
• lonely

Pitchfork (9.5)
• irresistible
• heartbroken
• hushed
• introspective
• alluring
• rustic
• experimental
• broader
• sophisticated
• warm
• mythological
• logical
• surprising
• ambitious
• unusual
• subtle
• holistic
• uncanny
• breathtaking
• elemental
• unexpected
• flawless
• unabashed
• unironic
• almost naive
• long-maligned
• knotty
• careful
• rare
• inevitable
• not something you would describe as angelic

Rolling Stone (3.5/5)
• beardy
• electrified
• wooly
• potent
• unlikely
• gnarly
• logical
• baroque
• woodsy
• raw-honey
• refracted
• shimmery
• elegant
• engaging
• schmaltz
• bearded
• rural

The Guardian (5/5)
• ethereal
• serene
• magnificent
• intricately
• dazzled
• surging
• supple
• joyful
• swollen
• emotional
• mesmerizing

Spin (8/10)
• bearded
• rootsy
• penetrating
• potent
• stunning
• enchanted
• gorgeous
• unique
• beautiful
• thundering
• bass-in-your-face
• singular
• lyrical
• idiosyncratic
• loosey-goosey
• inveterate
• taste-flouting
• layered

Entertainment Weekly (A-)
• critically adored
• folky
• isolated
• bendy
• scruffy
• unassuming
• emboldened
• beautiful
• widened
• proggy
• yacht-rock
• swirling
• haunting
• beardo
• forlorn
• enveloping
• uplifting



Joe Veix is a writer and humorist based in Brooklyn. He compiled this list while isolated in a cabin deep in the woods.

21 Comments / Post A Comment

dntsqzthchrmn (#2,893)

Awww yeah. Music criticism!

stuffisthings (#1,352)

This reminds me of the time I extracted all the adjectives from one of the sex scenes in Birdsong (for similar reasons to here).

BirdNerd (#4,196)

I'm sorry the answer we were looking for was "Weepy."

Jerkwheat (#2,247)

Hornsby-esqe

whizz_dumb (#10,650)

cabin-bound, bearded, beardy, beardo. Jeez Chrissy, don't be so…unangelic.

i sense a bias toward outlets that give out stars and stickers cough cough

Dave Bry (#422)

Here's to outlets that do not. (The numbers sap the power of all those adjectives!)

I liked this a lot, though.

Murgatroid (#2,904)

Seems like the Guardian got their review copy of the Bon Iver album mixed up with the new Natalie Merchant.

Paul B@twitter (#13,135)

Some of those are adverbs but whatever, I get it.

hman (#53)

-sausage
-pork
-jerky
-scrap
NYT 6/5/11

Craig Brownson (#4,257)

Swollen, penetrating beardo? Inevitable.

jfruh (#713)

Objection! Beardo is a noun, not an adjective. I mean, I went to the EW review and they're using it as an adjective, but they're wrong. Also, the context in which they're using it as an adjective is in the phrase "Vernon layers and manipulates his haunting voice like a beardo T-Pain." EW should be bombed from space, is what I'm saying.

djfreshie (#875)

@jfruh

There are thousands of reasons that EW (and Rolling Stone for that matter) should be bombed from space, and their misuse of the noun-as-adjective "Beardo" is among one of their lesser offenses.

We agree on everything though.

Matt (#26)

Constipated.

@Matt But Matt, Bon Iver was like into being constipated before it like hit the mainstream with like Activia and stuff, man. He's like pre-Jamie Lee Curtis constipated.

I don't care. You can't make me stop loving Bon Iver.

anthropomo (#10,734)

Only "yacht-rock" makes me want to hear this record.

Tully Mills (#6,486)

"Michael Boltony"

hazmathilda (#839)

Referring to this list the next time I get stuck while doing Dirty Mad Libs.

dntsqzthchrmn (#2,893)

@hazmathilda Dirty HIPPIE Mad Libs, you mean.

6h057 (#1,914)

Words With Frenemies

Yes, it took me 3 days to come up with that…

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