Thursday, May 12th, 2011
26

Understanding England's "Gag Order" Scandal

Balk: So, and this will never happen but I want someone to match all the silhouettes in the Mail and Sun to the actual photos they are based on.

Choire: Whoa. "ONE of Britain's top bloggers caused chaos on Twitter yesterday after appearing to link more than a dozen celebrities to gagging orders."

Balk: But I wouldn't even know who to start with on that.

Choire: I don't even know how to find what blogger they're talking about!

Balk: It's Guido Fawkes.

Choire: Huh. Okay, but I'm confused….

Balk:


Annie Lennox, papers seem to have stopped covering her lately.Wed May 11 13:40:30 via web

Choire: Oh no, not Annie! Well, hmm, this is like reading a foreign language.

Balk: Ha.

Choire: Literally this is impenetrable to me!

Balk: Really?

Choire: I never said I was bright. So wait. There's a gag order about what?

Balk: Oh. It's more about who HAS the gag orders out.

Choire: … Regarding?

Balk: They are all privacy claims.

Choire: …

Balk: "Slept with hooker," "had affair with," etc.

Choire: Annnnnd? Oh God, am I stupid? SOME DAY THE GUARDIAN WILL EXPLAIN THIS TO ME.

Balk: Basically, one or more papers was going to report on these stories, but before they could the celeb in question got a prior restraint.

Choire: Ohhh! So there were a number of stories, and then these people went to the courts… and everything died.

Balk: Right. So the papers all know who did what to who but can't name names.

Choire: Ah.

Balk: Which is unfortunate for the prostitutes who want to sell their stories to the tabs.

Choire: So much for Nick Denton's romanticization of the English newsroom!

Balk: I'm not sure how I feel about this take, but it does explain a lot.

Choire: Yow! What happened to the days when people just got to have hot sex with footballers and then go on with their lives?

Balk: I blame our "everyone's a celebrity" culture.

26 Comments / Post A Comment

Sproing (#561)

Yanks who romanticize living in England annoy me. CCTV, prior restraints on the press, the class system, the plumbing … it's fucking terrifying.

freetzy (#7,018)

@Sproing But, oh, God, the Hob Nobs.

Flashman (#418)

@Sproing Oh come on, there's lots to love about Blighty… the murmur of bumblebees in the pub garden on a warm summer afternoon, the crack of cricket bat striking ball as shadows begin to creep over the village green, the mournful creaking of the gallowspole as it bears a new, frantic load

LondonLee (#922)

Don't forget the bacon sandwiches

Baboleen (#1,430)

@LondonLee And Pippa's ars.

IBentMyWookie (#133)

And to think I was taking financial advice from Choire. Excuse me for a second while I call my accountant.

@IBentMyWookie THE AWL IS NOT A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL ADVICE. NO WARRANTIES EXPRESSED OR IMPLIED.

keisertroll (#1,117)

@Choire Sicha I now regret putting it all in my ChoIRA.

keisertroll (#1,117)

Also, Cho-IRA is how I pronounce "Choire".

@Male Awl Readers DISCLAIMER DOES NOT EXTEND TO THE AWL'S SARTORIAL ADVICE, WHICH YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY ALWAYS FOLLOW.

KarenUhOh (#19)

@IBentMyWookie That's what I thought, too, that time Choire told me to punt.

@KarenUhOh I think you misheard me.

dntsqzthchrmn (#2,893)

You said to bunt?

Tulletilsynet (#333)

@Choire Sicha
Okay so now I am going to short pants whenever I feel like it. Go short in men's pants. Something.

BadUncle (#153)

I'm sure I would care more if were I british and lagered up.

Mary Mouse (#670)

@Mary Mouse THIS. Extremely amazing!

Mary Mouse (#670)

@Choire Sicha You may recognise the footballer with his face in shadow in the article Balk linked as one…Ryan Giggs.

Louis Fyne (#2,066)

This has actually been a fantastic experience to witness first hand. So the twitter account named soemthing like 13 people, of which it appears about 9 or 10 were true. So the papers are still blocked from reporting on the TRUE ones, so instead they are blowing up the denials of the ones that appear to be genuinely FALSE. It is absolutely surreal.

Also, the Daily Mail is playing the Harpo role in the whole ordeal, running around gleefully spreading completely anarchy. It is delightful to watch.

Baroness (#273)

@Louis Fyne: They really are having a ball at the Mail. "Your Secret Life? So why no mention of your wife, Hugh? …other than the fact that she drives a Volvo!" That's the headline. The text has wicked bits like this:

"Last night Hugh (Bonneville) guest-starred in Doctor Who, playing a pirate captain whose ship is in peril from a beautiful siren – an event that made the gossip columns. ‘Where can they have drawn inspiration for such a role?’ asked one writer. But then Hugh’s devotion to wife Lulu is so strong it is understood he is known to fellow thespians as the Ryan Giggs of the showbusiness world, after the famously family-orientated footballer."

Delightful to watch indeed.

Smitros (#5,315)

Gag? You'd think celebrities would be used to swallowing.

jfruh (#713)

"Who exactly is Imogen, and what purpose does she serve on this Earth?" Ha ha, lordy!

KarenUhOh (#19)

I've been spending a few moments here, fantasizing about Nick Denton waxing rhapsodic about something. Anything.

No. Wait. I was just fantasizing about him waxing.

deepomega (#1,720)

I can't even fathom that this is an option, legally. Why is this possible??

boyofdestiny (#1,243)

@deepomega These people don't even have a written constitution. Anything is possible!

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