Do You Accidentally Live in One of NYC's 20 Hot Micro-Hoods?
In this coming Monday's New York magazine: "Tomorrow’s Hot Neighborhoods Today." Pack your bags, kiddos! You can only hope to live in "Twenty under-the-radar microneighborhoods that may just be the Next Big Thing, from McGolrick Park to the Lower East FiDi. Including: Four micro-micro-neighborhoods that are blossoming on side streets, thanks to a slew of new storefronts." Okay, if you are proposing McGolrick Park—Greenpoint's stretch of Nassau and Driggs on the far side of McGuinness, then times are strange. Mmm, the screaming emanating from PS110! And the Polish weeping at Arthur's Funeral Home! How delicious, a nine-block walk to the Nassau G train stop. Great for the unemployed! At least property values will always be depressed, thanks to being directly adjacent to one of the most contaminated sites around. Easy access to cancer!
My favorite micro-hood was Daphne Abdela.
I propose a system in which each block has its own name, e.g., Grand between Manhattan and Graham becomes Grabemangra. "I live in Jebeknirv, you wouldn't have heard of it."
SO THERE.
What is the block bounded by Broadway, Dyckman, Seaman and Cumming to be called?
@Molly: I can't BELIEVE you can afford Jebeknirv!
@Tulletilsynet If you can hear yourself think over the drag racing and drug dealer "I'm here" song blasting out of whichever Lamborghini is on Dyckman this week then you can call that block whatever filthy portmanteau you want.
Yeah but, which floor?
My hood is so micro that you can only access it through the kegolator at the Gowanus Yacht Club.
you might be in a nanoneighborhood.
I lived, for a short period, in an ashtray at Freddy's Backroom. Man, if those grooved notches could talk…
The Hottest Micro-Micro-'hood in my area is known as My Guest Bathroom, the only place I can get any goddamned peace and quiet these days.
I wonder what day it will be when NYC disappears completely up its own asshole? And will New York Magazine be there firing of Champagne Poppers from the vanishing duodenum?
Eventually the microhoods will fit into standard 40' shipping containers.
Better to be on the inside popping out though, right?
Hmmm… somebody sounds a little jealous. Best part of that map is that the industrial zombieland on the other side of Newtown Creek is called Blissville. Who knew?
HA! This is actually exactly where I live!
But actually it's really nice.