Friday, February 11th, 2011
19

I Have A Cold


About ten days ago, I found myself thinking, Hey, here it is February and I haven't yet gotten sick this winter. Of course, even just thinking this was as good as eating a double-scoop ice-cream cone where the ice-cream was replaced by germs. Or having a large, germ-covered housefly fly straight down my throat and directly into my lungs and buzz around in there splotching its hairy, germ-covered body repeatedly against my vulnerable alveoli. Or going outside soon after a shower, while my hair was still wet, having forgotten a hat, and walking fifteen blocks in twenty-degree weather. That last one is what I did, the very next day.

That night, I had a sore throat. The next day, I had a cold. Nothing major. Nothing life-threatening. (I hope.) I've been taking Theraflu at night so I can get the same fitful five hours of sleep that I regularly do. And I've been able to get a little bit of work done and still make it to my kid's school to pick him up ten minutes after I was supposed to have everyday like usual. But lots of phlegm, sinus pressure and some coughing—and the sore throat has stuck around. By the looks of things, ten days into it, with no signs of abating, this is the cold I will ride out the winter on.

Coincidentally, I've been listening to Jonathan Richman's first album, The Modern Lovers, and it's been making me feel better. I hadn't listened to it in years, and, man, it's so totally great. Has anyone ever sung better with a stuffed-up nose?

19 Comments / Post A Comment

HiredGoons (#603)

Jonathan Richman used to use the same Blockbuster as me.

That is all.

Annie K. (#3,563)

It's spelled phlegm, Dave. But I sound unsympathetic and I'm not. Please, feel better soon.

petejayhawk (#1,249)

If he wants to have flem in his caughing, let him have flem in his caughing. Who are you to castigate the ill?

I am just worried that we could have a William Henry Harrison situation on our hands here.

Alex Balk (#4)

My fault for missing that. My defense is I too have a cold, and the Sudafed is MESSING ME UP.

petejayhawk (#1,249)

At least you are still allowing him his caughing.

Did you get the REAL Sudafed or the janky pseudoephedrine-free crap?

Alex Balk (#4)

GODDAMNIT. I'm firing both of us now.

Alex Balk (#4)

And hell yes the real Sudafed. I'm sure the DEA is gonna raid my apartment any minute now.

Annie K. (#3,563)

@pete: I had to google WH Harrison and now I shudder to think and will castigate no more.
@Alex: I love me some real Sudafed but it interferes with the copyediting no end. And I entirely missed "caughing," no excuse.

Dave Bry (#422)

Oy. I wish I could blame it on the kawfing. But my spelling is regularly horrendous. (And Balk regularly bails me out.) Thanks for the well-wishes.

KarenUhOh (#19)

If you've not heard it–but of course you have–I highly recommend the version of "Roadrunner" on Beserkley Chartbusters, Vol. I. There was no Vol. II.

kneetoe (#1,881)

I want in on this editing thing!!! Ok, you had the thought 10 days ago, and it was the next day that you took the walk, but then, at the end, you say you are 10 days into the cold. THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE. Also, cold doesn't cause colds.

kneetoe (#1,881)

Oh never mind, I'll just re-read it tomorrow and all will be well. Feel better, guys. I never would, but, after 10(ish) days, you might think of seeing a doctor. No? Ok.

Dave Bry (#422)

Well, I'm all for more editing. And lord knows I could use it. But I did say "about" ten days ago in the first sentence—and I was thinking of it like that. ("Eleven or twelve days ago" sounded clumsy to me, especially for a first sentence.)
And, actually, yes, cold does cause colds. Or, more accurately, cold makes us more susceptible to catching a cold from germs because our immune systems are taxed by having to heat us. Here is a New York Times article I often cite in the discussion: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/11/22/health/22real.html

And thanks, Kneetoe!

kneetoe (#1,881)

Haha, one group of studies exposed people to infectious mucus (ewwww) and then forced them to sit in frigid rooms, and another study had people soak their bare feet in ice water "for long periods"!

Sounds like, at best, the evidence is still out on this one. If you participate in a further study, be sure to make it into the control group.

Dave Bry (#422)

Yes. Sciencewise, the jury's still out. (And, yes, definitely better to be in the control group!) But from personal experience (far too much of it), I'm a believer.

kneetoe (#1,881)

Then by all means go with the experience. And hope you know I was just joking about the 10 day thing. By the way, I am, and I can assure you this is true, the WORST speller in the world.

bbqcornnuts (#7,753)

I can tell you how to treat this – hot whiskey and honey. It won't kill the germs but you will be at peace with the illness.

Mort Young (#9,769)

One Shot glass of vodka.
Cures everything.

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