Monday, January 10th, 2011
193

Young Manhattanite is Beacon on New York Shabbos Scene

today i worked on my movie script for four hours after work in the cafeteria at the Whole Foods in Tribeca and then when i was done i bought some sushi and took the train home and watched The Simpsons by myself in my living room and ate my sushi. i know this already sounds sad but it wasn't sad, you know, like some days you just eat dinner by yourself and it's not necessarily a sad occasion. some days there just aren't other people around to eat dinner with

anyway so while i was at Whole Foods, working on my movie script, i asked my girlfriend if i could come over later and she said she was on deadline for a magazine story and she'd be working all night so i couldn't come over. and then i Gchatted with someone at a website that i write for and she said said she wasn't going to any parties tonight but she's going to a party tomorrow night that i should come to. so then i started downloading a torrent of a movie so i'd have something to do tonight but then luckily my friend who works for Flavorpill Gchatted me and asked if i wanted to go to the Young Manhattanite Shabbat party so i said yes. i'm not saying i wouldn't have gone to the Young Manhattanite party if i already had something to do but i would have weighed my options for longer than 5 seconds probably. i asked Mike if he wanted to come with me and he said sure

so Young Manhattanite is a group Tumblr that was written up in the New York Times a few months ago, and apparently their Shabbat parties are like some of the ultimate blog parties to go to (this sounds sarcastic but it's not), so i was nervous to go. in the Times article the author writes, "Despite Mr. Krucoff’s aplomb within the 'big, incestuous social circle' of media types — some of whom attend his YM beer-and-challah Shabbat parties — he says he has little interest in being a snarky scenester."

that declaration put me at ease but i was still nervous, and i thought about taking an anti-anxiety pill before going but then decided against it because i don't have that many left and i promised myself i wasn't buying more. i don't really understand what the Young Manhattanite Tumblr does exactly, i followed it after the Times thing but haven't really read the Tumblr, but i guessed the bloggers probably wouldn't be asking guests in-depth questions about their own Tumblr at their own party so i figured i was in the clear re: not knowing about Young Manhattanite

so then i took the subway into Manhattan and me and Mike met up in the Lower East Side and walked over to the party which was at Andrew Krucoff's apartment. i brought three Four Lokos (24 o.z. each, the equivalent of a six-pack of beer) with me in my backpack, which i got at the deli when they announced the Four Loko ban and i have been keeping them in the fridge ever since. as soon as i got to the party i put them on the counter in the kitchen so i'd have an automatic conversation starter—today i read that the company that makes Four Loko has started to turn it into fuel for cars, and if somebody made a comment about the Four Loko i brought, i could continue the conversation by talking about how they are turning Four Loko into car fuel and then we would be on our way to having a normal conversation! look at me go

so anyway, me and Mike get there and my friend from Flavorpill leads us upstairs and introduces us around. he doesn't know that Mike blogs for a popular magazine and Mike doesn't mention it. everyone at this party writes for somewhere cool on the internet, and gets around to mentioning it, so i can tell you that at this party was the girl who runs The Today Show's Tumblr, my friend who writes for Flavorpill, a guy who writes for FastCompany, Andrew Krucoff who helps manage the 92nd St Y's online presence, several people who write on Summer of Megadeth (Young Manhattanite's sister Tumblr) and several who write on Young Manhattanite obviously, a girl who writes for Crushable, a guy who has done unspecified work for Gawker and The Forward, a guy who writes for The Nation, a girl who wrote for Idolator and now writes for a new music lifestyle startup that hasn't launched fully yet, a guy who writes for Esquire, etc etc etc. there was a lot of talk about backchannel emailing. there are more people and publications that i just don't remember. everyone was very nice to me.

so when we got there we stood in the kitchen talking to people and they started telling jokes and i mentioned that i had a lesbian joke that my friend who is in a lesbian punk band texted me a couple hours ago. Andrew Krucoff, who i think is about 5'8" and has a beard and a warm smile (if you want to picture this) quietly mentioned that the girl sitting behind him was a lesbian, and i tried to explain that my lesbian joke wasn't offensive (it's just a play on words and was told to me by a girl in a lesbian punk band who has a pretty sensitive barometer for offensiveness i think), but then Andrew Krucoff strategically walked away before i told the joke (i guess he thought it was about to get really uncomfortable). so i told Mike the joke my friend sent me, which was "what do you call a thousand angry lesbians with guns?" and he said "what?" and i said "militia etheridge" and he laughed. and then Andrew Krucoff overheard and came back and said "i think i actually read that in an email today!!! or was it somewhere on the internet?" and it made me think my friend was just googling lesbian jokes or reading a popular site and passing the jokes off as her own

Andrew Krucoff's apartment reminded me of my own first apartment in Manhattan, a 3-bedroom in the east village that me, beau, joe and chris lived in when we were 19 and also young Manhattanites. Krucoff's was a 1-bedroom but it was pretty much the same idea. in my apartment i had a queen-size bed and it touched the walls on 3 sides because my room was converted from a kitchen by the management company. Joe slept on a queen-size mattress on the floor on the other side of the apartment, two feet from the wall and one foot from chris, who slept on a twin bed that was pushed up against the opposite wall. being young Manhattanites wasn't as glamorous as we were expecting

anyway after i told the lesbian joke, i went to the bathroom and i imagined immigrant families cramming into this apartment like 150 years ago, sleeping on the floor and bathing in the kitchen and smelling sewage all day, and then i got a Negra Modelo out of the fridge and listened to the guy from Flavorpill tell a joke which was something like "two racehorses walk into a bar and order drinks. one racehorse says, 'something bit me on the ass while i was racing today!' and then the other racehorse says, 'wow, something bit me on the ass too!' and then a dog walks up to them and says 'i couldn't help but overhear your conversation—the exact same thing happened to me' and then the bartender says 'holy shit! a talking dog!!!!!'"

then it was time for the blessings and the challah. Andrew Krucoff ushered everybody into the living room and then the guy who works for Gawker read a summary of this week's Torah portion (in Judaism, every week gets its own section of the story in the holy book) off his iPhone. then he tore off pieces of the challah and everybody passed the pieces towards the back of the crowd and since i was in the back, and probably like 5 people had already touched my piece of challah with unwashed hands, i thought about how to pretend i was eating my bread but secretly stuff it in my pocket while everyone else was eating theirs. then somebody came out of the bathroom and stood behind me, so it would have been impossible to fake eating the bread without him seeing, so i just ate it and wondered how many other New York Jews in the room were going through the same neurotic process at the same moment

then i went to the fridge and drank another Negra Modelo and listened to two girls talk about a guy that one of them is casually sleeping with. she said that she had texted him something like "i'm getting ready to leave a party in the Lower East Side—what are you up to?", which made me feel like, okay, if someone is speaking so casually about getting ready to leave a party, i also should have been preparing to leave at that point, or at least mentioning that i was thinking about leaving. so the guy hadn't texted her back and it had been a while, and also earlier that day it took him two and a half hours to respond to her text. honestly i didn't think things were looking good for this girl but we had just met so i didn't think it was my place to tell her the guy was just not that into her. then the other girl said something like "be more aggressive with him!" and also something like "tell him you wanna have sex in his bed right now!" and i almost told them both that i thought those were terrible ideas and i thought she was playing the situation appropriately with the "getting ready to leave a party" text, but i realized i was too drunk to get my thoughts together coherently and persuasively about why the "let's have sex now" text was the wrong move, so i kept quiet and nodded

then it really seemed like time to leave. everyone was saying their goodbyes but i didn't really have that many people to say goodbye to, so i listened to the guy from Esquire as he said goodbye to the guy from Flavorpill: the guy from Flavorpill put his hand on the guy from Esquire's shoulder, and the guy from Esquire said "every time you touch me on the shoulder i feel like i'm having an intervention" and i laughed even though i was trying to pretend i wasn't eavesdropping on what they were saying to each other. then i left, called my girlfriend on the way to the subway, told her about the party, got on the subway, wrote this, got out of the subway, and then read through a Google Alerts email for my blog, which included mostly insults. i stopped at the deli on the way home to get pretzels, but they didn't have the kind i like. being a young Brooklynite is not as glamorous as i was expecting

Sent via Blackberry from T-Mobile



"David "Shapiro" is 22 and lives in New York City and has a Tumblr.

193 Comments / Post A Comment

NinetyNine (#98)

needs more :), generally

jolie (#16)

"everyone was very nice to me."

Devastating.

NinetyNine (#98)

umbornwhisky liked this

Art Yucko (#1,321)

Kickoff is in about 10 minutes or so. :)

Matt (#26)

unbornwhisky liked this

osmium (#7,705)

Cyberman shredding guitar: "HAVE YOU MET MY SYSTER?"

NinetyNine (#98)

unbornwhisky liked this

Matt (#26)

Every day I don't wake up over the last gravestone shop on the Lower East Side is a success.

Matt (#26)

What is Peter Feld like in real life?

Miles Klee (#3,657)

Conspicuously absent.

Peter Feld (#79)

I like to think of it as "pretty vacant."

NinetyNine (#98)

So it's okay to make fun of the guy who writes for Esquire again?

Matt (#26)

That's What The Guy From Flavorpill Said

NinetyNine (#98)

Matt Ealer is never leaving his comment boycott.

Matt (#26)

There's lots of great reasons why no one would want to see the guy who works for Gawker in a bathing suit.

jolie (#16)

Was it ever not? (Confidential to the guy who writes for Esquire: Don't send me snifflemail about how I hate you. I'm teasing. T-E-A-S-I-N-G.)(Confidential to the rest of you: I'm really not teasing I just hate snifflemail.)

NinetyNine (#98)

The last 800 YM shabboses were kind of meh, but I have high hopes for the next 800.

Matt (#26)

unbornwiskey liked this

osmium (#7,705)

Who the fuck is David Mustaine?

Matt (#26)

Bad scene, Jay's fault.

Matt (#26)

What about the SOM MEATUPS? No one ever talks about that part constantly.

maybe the guy who hadn't texted that girl back was sleeping with your girlfriend. :( ?

Art Yucko (#1,321)

Here let me read from my copy of He's Just Not That Into You for you me.

NinetyNine (#98)

WHO WILL SERVE CHALLAH IN AMERICA? WHO WILL SERVE CHALLAH IN AMERICA? WHO WILL SERVE CHALLAH IN AMERICA?

Matt (#26)

Go try to find a grubby-handed piece of challah on the internet.

jfruh (#713)

Until I got to the "sent from my BlackBerry" bit at the end I thought maybe there was some obscure talmudic prohibition against using the shift key on the sabbath.

GoGoGojira (#2,871)

He was typing with his elbows so that it was only a Rabbinical transgression

NinetyNine (#98)

Three people commenting. Seems about right.

MISS U HALOSCAN

Matt (#26)

HATE U DAS KRAPITALISM

Matt (#26)

What about the lack of proper utensils? They never talk about that part.

Matt (#26)

YOUR WELCOME

Matt (#26)

Really though, in all seriousness, this post omits the most important part of the evening: When Brad Nelson turned off the Doors in favor of the Cure.

NinetyNine (#98)

Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com

Matt (#26)

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NinetyNine (#98)

That comment is in reply to which of the last 800 comments?

Matt (#26)

unbornwhiskey liked this

Art Yucko (#1,321)

writhes on Summer of Megadeth

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

:L

Matt (#26)

LEAST

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

:)))))))))))))))

Leon (#6,596)

mommy daddy awl is playing baseball inside again (looks like http://bit.ly/9BOGD8)

Art Yucko (#1,321)

[ :) ]

Matt (#26)

::Behrle Archie Comic about how the people who read Adbusters — now get this — are actually consumers THEMSELVES (!!)::

Art Yucko (#1,321)

SHOULD'VE STAYED HOME AND WATCHED THE COTTON BOWL OUT FRONT SHOULD'VE TOLD YA.

NinetyNine (#98)

MOST ETHICAL COMMENT

Art Yucko (#1,321)

MOST ETHICAL STRATEGIC WALKING-AWAY-FROM-COMMENT

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

THE MOST ETHICAL REVIEW OF A GNALLARLY EVENT EVER. WRITE MORE OF THESE PLEASE? :)

Matt (#26)

Can someone please send Aaron Lefkove a copy of this please?

Matt (#26)

Please?

Art Yucko (#1,321)

Aaron Lefkove's reply: "hey check out this photo of my asshole."

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

The most ethical shit ever taken /fixed

bmichael (#213)

I thought it was a SoM party first and a YM shabbos (am I allowed to say that?) second.

Matt (#26)

The guy who writes for FastCompany taught me.

Matt (#26)

Also if this'd been an officially sanctioned SOM event they would have been drinking ZEVONS and not that Loko crap.

#NOT SORRY NOT-DAVIS

Jim Behrle (#3,292)

I just did a list of New York City Media people I have ever met in person and it is a very short list

Matt (#26)

Veronica: BUT I HAVEN'T READ GAWKER SINCE 1958!!!

Art Yucko (#1,321)

YOURRRRR WELCOME, NEEWWWWW YOOORK CITY MEEEEDIA PEEEEOPLE

Matt (#26)

This comment thread is like having all my barkchunnels in one big wave.

NinetyNine (#98)

Ha ha ha. Ha ha. Ha.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

ha. ha ha. ha ha ha.

Tyler Coates (#451)

The only negative thing I have to say is that I was not mentioned as being there.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

selfportraitdrawingasapottedplant.jpg

Tyler Coates (#451)

Oh, I forgot the only difference between the draft I saw over the weekend and the post up above: "Sent via Blackberry from T-Mobile."

Art Yucko (#1,321)

I hear the iHitachi with G-Stim Attach does a pretty brvtal job.

Jim Behrle (#3,292)

I don't own an iphone (or a blackberry)

Art Yucko (#1,321)

BrianVerizon will help you with that.

Matt (#26)

This whole post is some ride-by Vangelizing.

NinetyNine (#98)

WAY TO GO, ABE SAUER.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

LOVE <3 <3 <3 color those shop-towel blue

NinetyNine (#98)

Remember when insider baseball posts ended with "And then I made out with Jen Cheung in the bathroom at the Mag?" Yeah, me neither.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

CATBUSES LOADED (stomps off to hategrind cumin seeds for BRVTAL BVRRITOS)

Is this one of those "backchannels" I keep hearing about?

NinetyNine (#98)

DVDE GUTS IT

Art Yucko (#1,321)

ALL YOU'RE COMMENTS ARE BELONG TO BIG O.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Oval Face, how do you feel about the political climate in the cuntry?

Matt (#26)

hey wanna cyber?

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

"a"/"s"/"l"?

Matt (#26)

He hangs out down on Stanton street. By the limestone pizza stand.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

HEY SHAPIRO. I WRITE FOR SOM AND I WAS THERE IN SPIRIT WHERE IS MY MENTION IN THIS?

Matt (#26)

Miles Klee doesn't exist.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Was Rex Sorgatz there/?????????????

Matt (#26)

*RexXx /fixXx'd DAT ASS for you

NinetyNine (#98)

ReXspeX the Farm.

NinetyNine (#98)

YOU GET AN PRIVATE CONVERSATION PRINTED ALL OVER THE INTERNET! YOU GET AN PRIVATE CONVERSATION PRINTED ALL OVER THE INTERNET! YOU GET AN PRIVATE CONVERSATION PRINTED ALL OVER THE INTERNET!

Matt (#26)

DAT SHOMER SHABBAT

Matt (#26)

More importantly, who threw the first beer and on whom?

NinetyNine (#98)

wait which backchannel are you responding to?

wait which backchannel are you responding to?

#wait which backchannel are you responding to?

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

The hackchannel has been ghostly all day long so I'm glad we're bringing this to the 'fore. What do y'all think about Firehouse's self-titled?

Matt (#26)

fIREHOSE or GTO

NinetyNine (#98)

Never heard it.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

This front channel is a Safeway to talk about our favorite hair metal

Matt (#26)

There's a relevant Blink-182 concept album.

Matt (#26)

But how many tumblrs were deleted that night is what I want to know.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

I'm waiting for Unborn Whiskey to come into this dudroom and like all of the comments

Matt (#26)

The ALL won't let me alert you to the fact that unbornwhiskey liked this.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Sometimes heshtml doesn't get closed they never talk about that part

roboloki (#1,724)

is this why we can't have nice things?

Matt (#26)

They don't like nice things anyway, General Lee.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Are you going to threewords.me or vyou me?

NinetyNine (#98)

STOMPS OFF TO HATE READ THE FUTURE.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Which Miles Klee is that again?

Matt (#26)

Go try to find that on Quora.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

They like to download hatereader apps for their iHitachi G-Stim, Generallazy

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

"david" "shapiro" has a "tumblr".

not until he deletes it

NinetyNine (#98)

"They like to talk about their screenplay, generally."

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

I remember certain lines and whose they are.

Matt (#26)

LET'S DO DRUGS AND LISTEN TO GONG

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

THROBBING GRISTLE OR GTFO

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

I had a good guitar when I was a young young kid

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Send lawyers guns and money, the shit has hit the fan

Matt (#26)

METAL CLOG

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Cachet… isn't that like panache but sitting down?

Matt (#26)

Nobody's said "YEAH BUDDY" yet.

NinetyNine (#98)

GOOD LOOKIN' OUT

NinetyNine (#98)

Did SOM just post their SAT scores?

osmium (#7,705)

666

Matt (#26)

The glogin is YEAHBUDDY69

Matt (#26)

THERE IS NO GLOGIN

NinetyNine (#98)

About four items are posted each day, unless there is a game of Bomb the Dashboard

Matt (#26)

Dip it in ranch.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

LAST IN THE WORLD

Matt (#26)

Still get paid in DAT AFTERLIFE

osmium (#7,705)

Just enjoy every Shabbos, ok?

Matt (#26)

Enjoy ever brisket-and-matzo taco.

iantenna (#5,160)

thewestcoast did not like this

Matt (#26)

JOIN ME IN LA, YEAH BUDDY

iantenna (#5,160)

i only do the OAKLAND STROKE.

Aatom (#74)

Just look at the mess you've all made here. Your father and I are very ashamed of you.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

LASTING BRVTALITY

Art Yucko (#1,321)

MOMMY?!… CAN I GO OUT AND… BACKCHANNEL TONIGHT?

Matt (#26)

This post is like Matt Cherette Is Still Not Sure Who Laurie Anderson Is… for heshers

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

GODDAMMIT

I am Legend.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

AND NOTHING ELSE MATTERZ

Matt (#26)

NO BOB COCK TUNEZ DUD

osmium (#7,705)

no thats no way for him has he no manners nor no refinement nor no nothing in his nature slapping us behind like that on my bottom because I didn't call him Hugh the ignoramus that doesnt know poetry from a cabbage thats what you get for notkeeping them in their proper place pulling off his shoes and trousers there on the chair before me so barefaced without even asking permission and standing out that vulgar way in the half of a shirt they wear to be admired like a priest or a butcher or those old hypocrites in the time of Julius Caesar of course hes right enough in his way to pass the time as a joke sure you might as well be in bed with what with a lion God Im sure hed have something better to say for himself an old Lion would O well I suppose its because they were so plump and tempting in my short petticoat he couldnt resist they excite myself sometimes its well for men all the amount of pleasure they get off a womans body were so round and white for them always I wished I was one myself for a change just to try with that thing they have swelling upon you so hard and at the same time so soft when you touch it my uncle John has a thing long I heard those cornerboys saying passing the corner of Marrowbone lane my aunt Mary has a thing hairy because it was dark and they knew a girl was passing it didnt make me blush why should it either its only nature and he puts his thing long into my aunt Marys hairy etcetera and turns out to be you put the handle in a sweepingbrush men again all over they can pick and choose what they please a married woman or a fast widow or a girl for their different tastes like those houses round behind Irish street no but were to be always chained up theyre not going to be chaining me up no damn fear once I start I tell you for stupid husbands jealousy why cant we all remain friends over it instead of quarrelling her husband found it out what they did together well naturally and if he did can he undo it hes coronado anyway whatever he does and then he going to the other mad extreme about the wife in Fair Tyrants of course the man never even casts a 2nd thought on the husband or wife either its the woman he wants and he gets her what else were we given all those desires for Id like to know I cant help it if Im young still can I its a wonder Im not an old shrivelled hag before my time living with him so cold never embracing me except sometimes when hes asleep the wrong end of me not knowing I suppose who he has any man thatd kiss a womans bottom Id throw my hat at him after that hed kiss anything unnatural where we havent 1 atom of any kind of expression in us all of us the same 2 lumps of lard before ever I do that to a man pfooh the dirty brutes the mere thought is enough I kiss the feet of you senorita theres some sense in that didnt he kiss our halldoor yes he did what a madman nobody understands his cracked ideas but me still of course a woman wants to be embraced 20 times a day almost to make her look young no matter by who so long as to be in love or loved by somebody if the fellow you want isnt there sometimes by the Lord God I was thinking would I go around by the quays there some dark evening where nobodyd know me and pick up a sailor off the sea thatd be hot on for it and not care a pin whose I was only to do it off up in a gate somewhere or one of those wildlooking gipsies in Rathfarnham had their camp pitched near the Bloomfield laundry to try and steal our things if they could I only sent mine there a few times for the name model laundry sending me back over and over some old ones old stockings that blackguardlooking fellow with the fine eyes peeling a switch attack me in the dark and ride me up against the wall without a word or a murderer anybody what they do themselves the fine gentlemen in their silk hats that K C lives up somewhere this way coming out of Hardwicke lane the night he gave us the fish supper on account of winning over the boxing match of course it was for me he gave it I knew him by his gaiters and the walk and when I turned round a minute after just to see there was a woman after coming out of it too some filthy prostitute then he goes home to his wife after that only I suppose the half of those sailors are rotten again with disease O move over your big carcass out of that for the love of Mike listen to him the winds that waft my sighs to thee so well he may sleep and sigh the great Suggester Don Poldo de la Flora if he knew how he came out on the cards this morning hed have something to sigh for a dark man in some perplexity between 2 7s too in prison for Lord knows what he does that I dont know and Im to be slooching around down in the kitchen to get his lordship his breakfast while hes rolled up like a mummy will I indeed did you ever see me running Id just like to see myself at it show them attention and they treat you like dirt I dont care what anybody says itd be much better for the world to be governed by the women in it you wouldnt see women going and killing one another and slaughtering when do you ever see women rolling around drunk like they do or gambling every penny they have and losing it on horses yes because a woman whatever she does she knows where to stop sure they wouldn't be in the world at all only for us they dont know what it is to be a woman and a mother how could they where would they all of them be if they hadnt all a mother to look after them what I never had thats why I suppose hes running wild now out at night away from his books and studies and not living at home on account of the usual rowdy house I suppose well its a poor case that those that have a fine son like that theyre not satisfied and I none was he not able to make one it wasnt my fault we came together when I was watching the two dogs up in her behind in the middle of the naked street that disheartened me altogether I suppose I oughtnt to have buried him in that little woolly jacket I knitted crying as was but give it to some poor child but I knew well Id never have another our 1st death too it was we were never the same since O Im not going to think myself into the glooms about that any more I wonder why he wouldnt stay the night I felt all the time it was somebody strange he brought in instead of roving around the city meeting God knows who nightwalkers and pickpockets his poor mother wouldnt like that if she was alive ruining himself for life perhaps still its a lovely hour so silent I used to love coming home after dances the air of the night they have friends they can talk to weve none either he wants what he wont get or its some woman ready to stick her knife in you I hate that in women no wonder they treat us the way they do we are a dreadful lot of bitches I suppose its all the troubles we have makes us so snappy Im not like that he could easy have slept in there on the sofa in the other room suppose he was as shy as a boy he being so young hardly 20 of me in the next room hed have heard me on the chamber arrah what harm Dedalus I wonder its like those names in Gibraltar Delapaz Delagracia they had the devils queer names there father Vial plana of Santa Maria that gave me the rosary Rosales y OReilly in the Calle las Siete Revueltas and Pisimbo and Mrs Opisso in Governor street O what a name Id go and drown myself in the first river if I had a name like her O my and all the bits of streets Paradise ramp and Bedlam ramp and Rodgers ramp and Crutchetts ramp and the devils gap steps well small blame to me if I am a harumscarum I know I am a bit I declare to God I dont feel a day older than then I wonder could I get my tongue round any of the Spanish como esta usted muy bien gracias y usted see I haven't forgotten it all I thought I had only for the grammar a noun is the name of any person place or thing pity I never tried to read that novel cantankerous Mrs Rubio lent me by Valera with the questions in it all upside down the two ways I always knew wed go away in the end I can tell him the Spanish and he tell me the Italian then hell see Im not so ignorant what a pity he didnt stay Im sure the poor fellow was dead tired and wanted a good sleep badly I could have brought him in his breakfast in bed with a bit of toast so long as I didnt do it on the knife for bad luck or if the woman was going her rounds with the watercress and something nice and tasty there are a few olives in the kitchen he might like I never could bear the look of them in Abrines I could do the criada the room looks all right since I changed it the other way you see something was telling me all the time Id have to introduce myself not knowing me from Adam very funny wouldnt it Im his wife or pretend we were in Spain with him half awake without a Gods notion where he is dos huevos estrellados senor Lord the cracked things come into my head sometimes itd be great fun supposing he stayed with us why not theres the room upstairs empty and Millys bed in the back room he could do his writing and studies at the table in there for all the scribbling he does at it and if he wants to read in bed in the morning like me as hes making the breakfast for I he can make it for 2 Im sure Im not going to take in lodgers off the street for him if he takes a gesabo of a house like this Id love to have a long talk with an intelligent well-educated person Id have to get a nice pair of red slippers like those Turks with the fez used to sell or yellow and a nice semitransparent morning gown that I badly want or a peachblossom dressing jacket like the one long ago in Walpoles only 8/6 or 18/6 Ill just give him one more chance Ill get up early in the morning Im sick of Cohens old bed in any case I might go over to the markets to see all the vegetables and cabbages and tomatoes and carrots and all kinds of splendid fruits all coming in lovely and fresh who knows whod be the 1st man Id meet theyre out looking for it in the morning Mamy Dillon used to say they are and the night too that was her massgoing Id love a big juicy pear now to melt in your mouth like when I used to be in the longing way then Ill throw him up his eggs and tea in the moustachecup she gave him to make his mouth bigger I suppose hed like my nice cream too I know what Ill do Ill go about rather gay not too much singing a bit now and then mi fa pieti Masetto then Ill start dressing myself to go out presto non son pill forte Ill put on my best shift and drawers let him have a good eyeful out of that to make his micky stand for him Ill let him know if thats what he wanted that his wife is fucked yes and damn well fucked too up to my neck nearly not by him 5 or 6 times handrunning theres the mark of his spunk on the clean sheet I wouldnt bother to even iron it out that ought to satisfy him if you dont believe me feel my belly unless I made him stand there and put him into me Ive a mind to tell him every scrap and make him do it in front of me serve him right its all his own fault if I am an adulteress as the thing in the gallery said O much about it if thats all the harm ever we did in this vale of tears God knows its not much doesnt everybody only they hide it I suppose thats what a woman is supposed to be there for or He wouldnt have made us the way He did so attractive to men then if he wants to kiss my bottom Ill drag open my drawers and bulge it right out in his face as large as life he can stick his tongue 7 miles up my hole as hes there my brown part then Ill tell him I want #1 or perhaps 30/- Ill tell him I want to buy underclothes then if he gives me that well he wont be too bad I dont want to soak it all out of him like other women do I could often have written out a fine cheque for myself and write his name on it for a couple of pounds a few times he forgot to lock it up besides he wont spend it Ill let him do it off on me behind provided he doesnt smear all my good drawers O I suppose that cant be helped Ill do the indifferent I or 2 questions Ill know by the answers when hes like that he cant keep a thing back I know every turn in him Ill tighten my bottom well and let out a few smutty words smellrump or lick my shit or the first mad thing comes into my head then Ill suggest about yes O wait now sonny my turn is coming Ill be quite gay and friendly over it O but I was forgetting this bloody pest of a thing pfooh you wouldn't know which to laugh or cry were such a mixture of plum and apple no Ill have to wear the old things so much the better itll be more pointed hell never know whether he did it nor not there thats good enough for you any old thing at all then Ill wipe him off me just like a business his omission then Ill go out Ill have him eyeing up at the ceiling where is she gone now make him want me thats the only way a quarter after what an unearthly hour I suppose theyre just getting up in China now combing out their pigtails for the day well soon have the nuns ringing the angelus theyve nobody coming in to spoil their sleep except an odd priest or two for his night office the alarmclock next door at cockshout clattering the brains out of itself let me see if I can dose off 1 2 3 4 5 what kind of flowers are those they invented like the stars the wallpaper in Lombard street was much nicer the apron he gave me was like that something only I only wore it twice better lower this lamp and try again so as I can get up early Ill go to Lambes there beside Findlaters and get them to send us some flowers to put about the place in case he brings him home tomorrow today I mean no no Fridays an unlucky day first I want to do the place up someway the dust grows in it I think while Im asleep then we can have music and cigarettes I can accompany him first I must clean the keys of the piano with milk whatll I wear shall I wear a white rose or those fairy cakes in Liptons I love the smell of a rich big shop at 71/2d a lb or the other ones with the cherries in them and the pinky sugar lid a couple of lbs of course a nice plant for the middle of the table Id get that cheaper in wait wheres this I saw them not long ago I love flowers Id love to have the whole place swimming in roses God of heaven theres nothing like nature the wild mountains then the sea and the waves rushing then the beautiful country with fields of oats and wheat and all kinds of things and all the fine cattle going about that would do your heart good to see rivers and lakes and flowers all sorts of shapes and smells and colours springing up even out of the ditches primroses and violets nature it is as for them saying theres no God I wouldnt give a snap of my two fingers for all their learning why dont they go and create something I often asked him atheists or whatever they call themselves go and wash the cobbles off themselves first then they go howling for the priest and they dying and why why because theyre afraid of hell on account of their bad conscience ah yes I know them well who was the first person in the universe before there was anybody that made it all who ah that they dont know neither do I so there you are they might as well try to stop the sun from rising tomorrow the sun shines for you he said the day we were lying among the rhododendrons on Howth head in the grey tweed suit and his straw hat the day I got him to propose to me yes first I gave him the bit of seedcake out of my mouth and it was leapyear like now yes 16 years ago my God after that long kiss I near lost my breath yes he said was a flower of the mountain yes so we are flowers all a womans body yes that was one true thing he said in his life and the sun shines for you today yes that was why I liked him because I saw he understood or felt what a woman is and I knew I could always get round him and I gave him all the pleasure I could leading him on till he asked me to say yes and I wouldnt answer first only looked out over the sea and the sky I was thinking of so many things he didnt know of Mulvey and Mr Stanhope and Hester and father and old captain Groves and the sailors playing all birds fly and I say stoop and washing up dishes they called it on the pier and the sentry in front of the governors house with the thing round his white helmet poor devil half roasted and the Spanish girls laughing in their shawls and their tall combs and the auctions in the morning the Greeks and the jews and the Arabs and the devil knows who else from all the ends of Europe and Duke street and the fowl market all clucking outside Larby Sharans and the poor donkeys slipping half asleep and the vague fellows in the cloaks asleep in the shade on the steps and the big wheels of the carts of the bulls and the old castle thousands of years old yes and those handsome Moors all in white and turbans like kings asking you to sit down in their little bit of a shop and Ronda with the old windows of the posadas glancing eyes a lattice hid for her lover to kiss the iron and the wineshops half open at night and the castanets and the night we missed the boat at Algeciras the watchman going about serene with his lamp and O that awful deepdown torrent O and the sea the sea crimson sometimes like fire and the glorious sunsets and the figtrees in the Alameda gardens yes and all the queer little streets and pink and blue and yellow houses and the rosegardens and the jessamine and geraniums and cactuses and Gibraltar as a girl where I was a Flower of the mountain yes when I put the rose in my hair like the Andalusian girls used or shall I wear a red yes and how he kissed me under the Moorish wall and I thought well as well him as another and then I asked him with my eyes to ask again yes and then he asked me would I yes to say yes my mountain flower and first I put my arms around him yes and drew him down Jo me so he could feel my breasts all perfume yes and his heart was going like mad and yes I said yes I will Yes.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

…what was that little shapeshifting thing in the original Tron? Bit? Yeah- that dude.

KarenUhOh (#19)

That's nice but please correct your typo.

6h057 (#1,914)

Hey, guys. What'd I miss?

Matt (#26)

GUTS DUD RESPEKK FARMS

Brad Nelson (#2,115)

unbornwhisky liked this

Matt (#26)

rendit liked this

Matt (#26)

ninety9 is publicly silent but will email you about it later

NinetyNine (#98)

"sponge-worthy"

Matt (#26)

I am pretty sure Bard just "liked" 90% of the posts on this thread and I love that more than life itself.

NinetyNine (#98)

He's gonna rend that up on Sneaker Glog.

BardCollege (#2,307)

@Matt Watch it buddy

6h057 (#1,914)

Guys, I don't understand what you're talking about. Is this some kind of inside humor?

NinetyNine (#98)

STRYKER DOT TUMBLR DOT COM

Matt (#26)

So You Want To Follow Summer Of Megadeth Metaclog

NinetyNine (#98)

CAN WE GET A "HESHER PATIOS" TAG UP IN HERE?

Matt (#26)

DETH TO FALSE META

6h057 (#1,914)

Guys, what's a hesher?

NinetyNine (#98)

Q: What is the best Rush album?

There is no wrong answer.

Matt (#26)

The best Rush album is the "Subdivisions" video posted 8 times in a row on Summer of Megadeth Meta Clog. Spee-King of which…

Matt (#26)

HEY THANKS FOR THE PLUG, GUTS, WE REALLY APPRECIATED.

SIGNED,

"SAC"'s LITTLE SISTER

Art Yucko (#1,321)

YOUR LA BREA KING MY FOOKING BARD.

I get a job for a week and I'm left in the dvst.

this is so inside it had better be wearing a condom

MikeBarthel (#1,884)

HOT WINGS JELLY BEANS GYPSY BEARS.

garge (#736)

Oh, what a relief, I thought I missed another Balloon Boy.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

And I'm lo(a)st

Pierce (#3,939)

I wish I didn't understand anything about this post. I wish…

Art Yucko (#1,321)

>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>
>>>
>>
>
>

Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com


Brad Nelson
Music Writer
Writhing Display
http://unbornwhiskey.tumblr.com

Matt (#26)

Dud you just solved vegan cleanse systems.

KarenUhOh (#19)

Thank God I'm a Quaker.

6h057 (#1,914)

Only a few get the glogin. David was the only one to glogout.

Matt (#26)

Dud on, dud in, glogout.

NinetyNine (#98)

It's like 4chan… for people with third-rate liberal arts degrees.

osmium (#7,705)

What is air? Is it like unemployment?

NinetyNine (#98)

REGRET REGRET REGRET

Matt (#26)

I'm researching a story about selling hitachi g-attach on craigslist for higher resale value through bargaining stim.

Matt (#26)

It's like a sewing circle… butt worse

Leon (#6,596)

DELETING MY INTERNET NOW THANKS

Matt (#26)

OUR'E WELCVM

buzzorhowl (#992)

Holy shit.

kennethtaylor (#11,074)

Welcome to Gov-Auctions.org, America's most trusted and largest resource for Government & Police, live & online car auctions of Government pre-owned and seized cars, trucks, and SUV's.
buy cheap cars

Matt (#26)

@kennethtaylor Agreed.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Thank you kennethtaylor. I am now enlightened unto lasting

Matt (#26)

Ayo.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

Hello, World!

Matt (#26)

You're single, right?

MikeBarthel (#1,884)

sent from my samsung galaxy s3

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