Wednesday, December 8th, 2010
11

Tommy Lee Writes Extremely Graphic Letter To President Of SeaWorld

"We understand that you refuse to release this frustrated whale because he is your chief sperm bank, and we know from SeaWorld's own director of safety (as well as videos on the web) that the way you get his sperm is by having someone get into the pool and masturbate him with a cow's vagina filled with hot water. Even during my wildest days with Motley Crue, I never could've imagined something so sick and twisted. Simply put, how can SeaWorld claim that trainers no longer have direct contact with this whale when they are jacking him off? That is about as 'direct' as it gets. I hope it doesn't take another tragic death for SeaWorld to realize it shouldn't frustrate these smart animals by keeping them in tanks."
Tommy Lee has written a letter to SeaWorld president Terry Prather protesting the continued captivity and, umm, use, of Tilikum, the killer whale who killed a trainer at the park earlier this year. (This opens a PDF of the letter.) Freeing Tilikum into the ocean doesn't seem like such a great idea either, I guess. Since he'd then soon be so chemically flame retardant. But, Jesus!

11 Comments / Post A Comment

soco (#8,225)

Sounds like a good deal for the Tilikum if you ask me. Except for the captivity part, I guess.

jolie (#16)

Hmm. I'm all for freeing animals if it's going to improve their quality of life, I don't think robbing Tilikum of his personal masturbator is going to make him less murder-y, ya know?

jolie (#16)

(that should say "but I don't think" but the edit function doesn't work so)

…and masturbate him with a cow's vagina filled with hot water. Even during my wildest days with Motley Crue, I never could've imagined something so sick and twisted.
Really Tommy? Really?

MikeBarthel (#1,884)

If I was Tommy Lee, I would drop that second sentence into every letter of complaint I wrote. Of course, if I were Tommy Lee, I would probably be way too stupid to think of this.

LondonLee (#922)

There's a VH1 reality show in this somewhere.

djfreshie (#875)

Rock of Blubber Bus

Aatom (#74)

I understand Rush Limbaugh's sperm is harvested in a similar fashion.

KarenUhOh (#19)

This is why Flipper was faster than lightning.

kneetoe (#1,881)

Gets jacked off regularly and is still frustrated? How sad. Maybe this won't happen any more when he's 90 (whale years).

OMG, I like the font.

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