Monday, November 22nd, 2010

The TSA Would Like You to Settle Down Now or You'll Get Screened Harder

This weekend's rollicking TSA scandal—stemming from this video—has come to a speedy resolution. Why, the TSA has blogged about it, so everything must be fine now! They write: "Their son alarmed the walk through metal detector and needed to undergo secondary screening. The boy's father removed his son's shirt in an effort to expedite the screening. After our TSO completed the screening, he helped the boy put his shirt back on. That's it. No complaints were filed and the father was standing by his son for the entire procedure." So shut up, everyone, and get back in line. Don't make us get the truncheons.

17 Comments / Post A Comment

C_Webb (#855)

"Truncheon" and "luncheon" look and sound way too much alike for things that are really so different.

garge (#736)

Something something club sandwich? (Sorry, Monday mornings &c.)

KarenUhOh (#19)

Patty Meltdown.

Pop Socket (#187)

I have long posited that the TSA serves no function except to indoctrinate Americans into mindlessly obeying random arbitrary authority. They have moved into Phase II of this campaign.

MParcells (#375)

It's like a Federally Sponsored round of Strip Simon Says.

zidaane (#373)

About 8-9 years ago at O'Hare I was dropping my son off to fly to KC when I realized he had a toy metal 6 shooter in his bag. I had to crotch it and find the nearest planter to get rid of it.
I needed a good drink after that.

BadUncle (#153)

All totally avoidable if kids were kept in size-appropriate kennels and put through the x-ray machine.

scroll_lock (#4,122)

The TSA shot publicist Ronni Chasen for refusing a pat down.

Elle (#7,022)

Oh do be a dear and get the truncheon, darling; it's ever such a nice day for a beating.

sigerson (#179)

On Saturday at the Fort Lauderdale airport, I watched as a 90+ year old man who couldn't walk without aid was forced to take his jacket and shoes off, get out of his wheelchair and walk through the backscatter scanner device. He couldn't raise his arms by himself so they helped him get into the right position for the scanner. Such incredible stupidity.

zidaane (#373)

Was his catheter bag over 3oz?

Bittersweet (#765)

Well, you know, al-Quaeda could've infiltrated the Sunrise Retirement Home, sigerson. For all we know he had explosives in his hearing aids.

kneetoe (#1,881)

True fact: no one is motivated for an eternity with a bunch of virgins like a very old guy.

cherrispryte (#444)

This is one of the best examples ever that things are not really problems until white men encounter them.

BoHan (#29)

More specifically, white men who own private security companies jonesing for the TSA's work. Hey, it worked for Blackwater. In the meantime, they post strangely untraceable video of the TSA doing its job.

macartney (#1,889)

Should be taking bets on how soon taking video footage of the screening area becomes illegal…

Cobalt (#7,571)

When a child is gate raped by the TSA, is it considered patophilia?

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