Wednesday, July 28th, 2010

JebWatch '10: It's Back On, Due to Verb Tenses!

JEBWATCHIt came to me in a dream-no wait, it came to me in an email from a reader last night. Yesterday, Jeb Bush said, "I am not running for president." Yes, I was crushed. But no longer! Why, you ask? Well, right now, I am not pickling beets. But that doesn't mean that I won't be pickling beets later tonight, or tomorrow, or next week! Verbs! They are so useful. We hereby announce JEB BUSH PRESIDENTIAL RACE WATCH NOT AT ALL OVER, due to the deceitful power of language and its uses!

28 Comments / Post A Comment

ShanghaiLil (#260)

You have such a mancrush on Jeb.

Annie K. (#3,563)

With all respect, will you stop this? You're going to go and make Jebwatch '10 viral and a groundswell of popular opinion and next thing you know, it'll be real. You're interacting with the system, Choire. You'll screw up the outcome. You'll create the very thing you fear.

I know but at least I'll be in on the ground floor… of doom. (And Democratic victory??)

Slava (#216)

?? indeed

brent_cox (#40)

I swear the same thing happened in 98 with his brother. He went from tragically dumb Bush scion to "He just might be the strongest GOP candidate" purely on the power of narrative.

@choire Second thought, forget I ever sent that email.

mmmark (#4,458)

And right on cue, he done went to a Tea Party.

KarenUhOh (#19)

If the upshot of this means that when he announces his candidacy he's not running, let's do it.

Jetpacks (#2,220)

He's IN! It's ON! Sarah is pissing in her furry boots!

dado (#102)

We are all pickling beets whether we know it or not.

keisertroll (#1,117)

Choire just wants Jeb to run so their torrid relationship will end more dramatically.

brent_cox (#40)

Jeb Bush will be picking beets!!

keisertroll (#1,117)


garge (#736)

Is this, like, the week for early 90s Nickelodeon references? I am NOT complaining, I just can't understand why I didn't receive my invitation as my postman is really good at what he does.

gumplr (#66)

You didn't hear? He quit and joined the Park Service to be closer to Ug.

HiredGoons (#603)

I have no problem picturing either of them wearing a belt around their heads and underwear on the outside.

garge (#736)

Perhaps you can annex a footer in Wonkette's corner mart and sell a well-constructed tote bag w/the JEBWATCH graphic? It seems I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT.

wb (#2,214)

Does this mean we can expect a How To Pickle Fucking Beets post??

cherrispryte (#444)

This would make my slavic heart swell with joy. And with beets.

hman (#53)

"First, sterilize your fucking mason jars…"

keisertroll (#1,117)


zidaane (#373)


Verb tense is also how I get around the tricky questions of masturbation that my wife keeps bringing up.

doubled277 (#2,783)

The important work

david h. (#5,700)

Choire, if you just read the comments on your original post you'd have realized this at 3:56 pm yesterday and could have saved yourself several hours of despair (of the Jeb-related variety at least).

MollyculeTheory (#4,519)

It's not true I ain't not NOT running for president? *parsed lips*

Baboleen (#1,430)

Great "strategery" on Jeb's part.

Juan Anon (#1,175)

To paraphrase Bill Clinton, "It depends on what the meaning of 'am' is."

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