Wednesday, July 14th, 2010
60

Digital Drugs: Internet Craze! Luring Kids! Alarming Trend!


WORDS ACTUALLY SPOKEN IN THIS NEWS REPORT: "The latest Internet craze… it's called i-dosing… websites are luring kids with free downloads of so-called digital drugs… this alarming new trend… Parents really need to listen up on this one!" But, wait, kids are worried too! "'I heard it was like some weird demons and stuff through an iPod and he was like freaking out,' said Mustang High School student Meghan Edwards."

60 Comments / Post A Comment

Moff (#28)

This shit has been in the news for so long now. All parents need to know is: If there were really free drugs available on the Internet, IT WOULDN'T BE A BIT STORY ON THE LOCAL NEWS. Also: I WOULD NOT BE HERE RIGHT NOW, LEAVING THIS COMMENT.

oudemia (#177)

Maybe you would be leave many, many very! intense! and! serious! comments overandoverandover.

wedding89 (#232,870)

@Moff I am agree with you totally. It's not possible to get free drugs in internet. It is was available that much many more kids would be drug addicted. They would suffer from irritating feelings, were in need of

Jeff Carpenter (#3,752)

Yeah, but news reports like this lead to heavy drinking among their viewers. When will the government step in and do something about THAT??

HiredGoons (#603)

Links plz.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

…so what do these gateway frequencies do?… make you soil your little Huggies?

ShanghaiLil (#260)

In my day, we called this "Pink Floyd."

Art Yucko (#1,321)

demons n stuff thru an ipod r sumthing

Yes. And Ozzy put them there, on purpose.

Liquid (#546)

Next – a hard-hitting report on the dangers of reading Kafka! Also, David Lynch: crazy director or GATEWAY DRUG?
(By the way, did anyone else notice that on the close-up of the iPod the time was set to 4:20? Heh heh heh….)

roboloki (#1,724)

i have awl the cyberdrugs i need right here.

hockeymom (#143)

Is "i-dosing" responsible for that reporter's skirt choice?

C_Webb (#855)

Five years together, and my laptop hasn't gotten me high ONCE. Fuckin' Dell, man …

Axel (#6,058)

anyone else notice the time on that iphone was 4:20? video editor ftw.

KarenUhOh (#19)

This report made me shave all the hair off my ass.

migraineheadache (#1,866)

Whoa I was just reading yesterday about 19hz standing waves that apparently cause to people to see ghosts by distorting vision, and the "Mosquito" noise that only young people ( and animals ) can hear.

The i-doses on youtube sound more like car audio tests to me though.

Unfortunately for me, my iPod graduated from the D.A.R.E. program.

melis (#1,854)

We all graduated from DARE. It didn't help.

MollyculeTheory (#4,519)

A terrifying new trend is getting children high off of random shit you have in the garage! Ping-pong balls & radios, yr children are using them to induce Ganzfeld hallucinations!

Also, Snow Crash?

NicFit (#616)

In other news, Eric Clapton's "Cocaine" is available on iTunes for 99 cents.

garge (#736)

But what is the transmission rate of HIV if you use the Internet intravenously? I am just looking for a ballpark estimate …

oudemia (#177)

Maybe it's this one Salvador Dali poem in French that a college friend claimed brought her to orgasm and got her high just from the reading of it?

MollyBloomberg (#1,169)

This is my local news station. They started a series "What Parents Should Know," or some shit like that. Very popular.

I know the producer – told me they ran out of threats 2 weeks in. Any ideas I can pass along?

The danger of local news threat segments. Or lack thereof. They can investigate the vigilance of the other stations.

sargasm (#104)

They already know it's not OK to dress your chillens up as witches or ghosts for Halloween (Satanic) so you might have to terrify them with the news that the new Harry Potter movie is coming.

MollyBloomberg (#1,169)

Oh, the HP witchcraft thing is a delicious evergreen. Never gets old.

I heard there's this Mexican guy running around making our kids fat. I believe his name is The Frito Bandito.

Aatom (#74)

Screw this noise. There's nothing like that .gov shit.

RocketSurgeon (#1,632)

Don't they snort Pixie Stix anymore?

mushr00m (#5,504)

This is nowhere as effective as spinning around in place for 20 seconds. Dear Mustang, OK: your kids are morons.

Shaun Charity (#6,061)

cell phone b-roll footage reads = 4:20

KofiBiney (#5,982)

And i'm proud to be an American, where at least I know i'm free……

Ah, yes, because the kids in the Midwest are already bored of meth.

TurboKitty (#6,068)

You gotta be fucking kidding me … no seriously … this has got to be a really bad Onion out-take … OMG this is fucking RIDICULOUS!!!

lemony (#161,238)

I was just reading yesterday about 19hz standing waves that apparently cause to people to see ghosts by distorting vision, and the "Mosquito" noise that only young people

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Rock Ey@facebook (#151,370)

Honestly, I've always been more of a fan of just putting the monitor to sleep than screen savers. Sure they look pretty awesome, but if you're sitting at your computer, are you really doing so with the screen saver on?Good luck for the dates. It has been some times since we last heard about the next tour.
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Basit Jani@facebook (#185,529)

Honestly, I've always been more of a fan of just putting the monitor to sleep than screen savers. Sure they look pretty awesome, but if you're sitting at your computer, are you really doing so with the screen saver on?Good luck for the dates. It has been some times since we last heard about the next tour.
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Basit Jani@facebook (#185,529)

Honestly, I've always been more of a fan of just putting the monitor to sleep than screen savers. Sure they look pretty awesome, but if you're sitting at your computer, are you really doing so with the screen saver on?Good luck for the dates. It has been some times since we last heard about the next tour.
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Basit Jani@facebook (#185,529)

Honestly, I've always been more of a fan of just putting the monitor to sleep than screen savers. Sure they look pretty awesome, but if you're sitting at your computer, are you really doing so with the screen saver on?Good luck for the dates. It has been some times since we last heard about the next tour.
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are you really doing so with the screen saver on?Good luck for the dates. It has been some times since we last heard about the next tour.

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are you really doing so with the screen saver on?Good luck for the dates. It has been some times since we last heard about the next tour.
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