Note: We don't usually do Craigslist posts here at the Awl, but when someone sent us the link to this Missed Connection we recognized its provenance and very quickly saved it in case it was taken down, which it almost immediately was. Here's the whole thing.
You sat there for almost seven minutes, gazing at me in utter silence. I did not say a word either, but inside I was suddenly changed, made new, no longer the famous performance artist whose innovative works on the limitations of the body and the distance between performer and subject have proved so baffling and influential to three generations of spectators and critics but now something different, a complete creation borne out of your steely gaze, a child, longing for protection in the shelter of your arms, a young woman feeling the first flush of love, an ingenue, a flirtatious wisp of a thing whose coy charms mask her deep desire to find the impossible connection between two people whose souls are obviously so destined to be entwined that words are superfluous and the entire firmament of artistic endeavor under which one has made one's entire career is irrevocably eradicated until all that remains is the pure animalistic desire which we suppress in ourselves in order to convince others of our humanity but which is never far below the surface no matter how placid-seeming the mask may be; your silence was a deep sharpened dagger moving slowly within me and the fire behind your eyes screamed forth its intention to consume me in its all-powerful flame until all that would be left of the two of us and every unnamed thing in this world would be a small pile of perfectly-formed ash and bone. This was last Tuesday, I know you remember it and felt it too. I also noticed that you had a terrific ass when you got up to leave. I'm done at MoMA but my new exhibit, "What Are You Looking At?" starts up at the Whitney in a couple of weeks. Please come by. We were made for each other.
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

She makes me want to Bjork.
Was that a bra movic in your pants, or were you just happy to be sitting across from me?
Let's get dinner some time, I know this intimate little place with the perfect table for two.
Then we can go catch a Broadway show. Perhaps, A Whore Us Line?
I am not going to SATC2.
"I called the number you left on that photo release form, but there was a woman's voice on the recording, so I didn't leave a message."
I'm sharpening my blue pencil. That is one long-ass run-on sentence.
Blue?! Heathen!
Blue, red, whatever. Your pencil is MISSING THE POINT.
Oh to be able to change every famous performance artist whose innovative works on the limitations of the body and the distance between performer and subject have proved so baffling and influential to three generations of spectators and critics
into a small pile of perfectly-formed ash and bone.
Best Cliffs Notes of a Craigslist Missed Connection, ever.
*hums "I Think I Love You"*
"[I]rrevocably eradicated" seems kinda redundant but apart from THAT, brava/o! (& lol)
MMMMMMMarketing, Marketing, Marketing BAby...and the boyz and gurlz at the Awlz have picked up the viral and punted it to the next 'sphere...clever--even consistent with the artistic endeavor...but still leaves a slightly metallic taste in the mouth.
At least something interesting came out of that exhibition.
"Oh, that was just my classroom-gaze. Like most things I do, best not to read too much into it."
-J. Franco
Mom?
(sorry)
Lionel Dobie called all performance artists comedians.
jack benteen said "i don't give up my gun without somebody getting hurt"
Jack Cates said, "Can I have my lighter back, Reggie?"
And the response came as a haiku:
Why has this woman
Been staring at me so long?
She's creepy as fuck.
Life would be oh so sweet, if I were a bicycle seat!
If this is a blind item, then it's obviously Marina Abramovic.
The age is right and she just finished her gig at MOMA 5/31.
doh
I liked this better:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olA0ibvLyz0