Tuesday, June 15th, 2010
27

Tea Partiers Have No Use For Emergency Services

I know it's plucking at low-hanging fruit to pull anything out of the rubber room that is National Review's The Corner, and it's particularly low-hanging fruit to call out a reader anecdote sent into that site's Jay Nordlinger, but there was something about this one that just struck me as so telling. Can you guess what it is?

A man from California wrote to say that he was talking with a local radio host – a woman of about 70 who told him, "This November, for the first time in my life, I'm going to vote straight Republican. I know they spend too much, too. But they won't be as out of control as what we have now. We have to do something."

Our reader said, "Jay, this is the spirit of the Tea Party: people who pay every tax, vote in every election, do jury duty, never call 9-1-1, never complain, never protest – and who have now reached the point of saying, ‘Enough.'

This, then, is the spirit of the Tea Party: They never call 9-1-1. You know who does call 9-1-1? Black people. And, once, Duran Duran. Not that it helped any.

27 Comments / Post A Comment

Matt (#26)

Tea Partiers realize that 9-1-1 is a fake life-saver.

Hobbesian (#255)

They read the Washington Post.

Matt (#26)

Don't Believe The Hype

Ron Obvious (#351)

No, they just can't remember the right sequence of numbers.

La Cieca (#1,110)

If they never call 9-1-1, how do they summon Rudy Giuliani?

atlasfugged (#4,481)

@La Cieca: Turn off all the lights, then, while looking into a mirror, lisp his name five times.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

Flav told me 911 was a joke.

Matt (#26)

Dude.

I thought it was 9/11 that was the joke.

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

Dude.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

SÓ§rry Dvde, Late comings with the late comin' stretcher!

As if any of those knuckle draggers go in for a spot of Earl Gray …

DoctorDisaster (#1,970)

9-1-1: FUCKING SOCIALIST.

Knowing the proper style for writing out 9-1-1, though? Kind of cool!

"I want to help you George Washington?"

Pop Socket (#187)

Ambulances are for the poorz.

Explain it to them thusly: 9-1-1 = Paul Revere's Ride

Flashman (#418)

Who needs 9-1-1 when you got 9-M-M ?

I assume that he also doesn't flush, or put his trash outside for collection.

Must be a fun neighbor.

Slava (#216)

They never complain?!

lurkystars (#3,581)

If only.

City_Dater (#2,500)

Did I dream that someone somewhere discovered that Joe the(Not)Plumber, Tea Party Man of the Hour, wasn't even registered to vote?

riotnrrd (#840)

Well, his name isn't Joe, he's not a licensed plumber and is a tax-cheat, so I think "isn't registered to vote" should just be a gimme.

La Cieca (#1,110)

The whole piece is very much "Spirit of Ronald Reagan," i.e., taking a hearsay account of a probably apocryphal anecdote and building policy from it.

MaryHaines (#3,666)

This strikes me as a great excuse to bring up that time John McCain's brother called 911 to complain about being stuck in traffic.

If there's one thing Tea Partiers hate, it's entitled, cranky white men!

MissaA (#4,724)

It's funny, sure. But it's also indicative of how much of conservativism centres around victim-blaming. Circumstances don't matter. Life events don't matter. If something bad happens to you, it's your own damn fault, and screw you for making good hardworking merkins pay for a fire truck to burning house. A responsible person would have let it burn to the ground, because that's what they deserved, and then pull themselves up by their bootstraps.

MissaA (#4,724)

Should read:
…fire truck to *save* your burning house.

Telegram Sam (#3,847)

Coupled with the I-got-mine-screw-you, it's their true belief in a nutshell.

Huh huh, you said merkin.

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