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Orgasm Fakers: Who Are They?
Who is most likely to pretend to orgasm? Economist Hugo M. Mialon has it all figured out: "[M]en and women who believe their partner can tell whether they are faking are less likely to fake; men and women who love their partner are more likely to fake; and men who are closer to age eighteen and women who are closer to age thirty are less likely to fake." There is also a correlation between education and the potential for prevarication, which once again proves my theory that college is a waste of time.
I thought that was John Carney's theory. Am I getting my writer and noted alcoholics confused again?
Only fools fake. Faking benefits NO ONE!
if it puts an end to bad sex it does.
Kitten is not wrong.
Please tell me more about this "bad sex."
carlin summed this up: good sex is really great and bad sex is still pretty fucking good.
@roboloki: I suspect The Ladies of The Awl will respectfully BEG TO FUCKING DIFFER.
Cap'n it's like bad pizza.
apologies. once i find a partner for my sexual adventures i hope to understand this more fully.
@kitten and Garge: but if I fake, the sex will continue to be bad because the other person there with me will never learn how to do that thing I like.
Disclaimer: This assumes I like this person enough to want to have sex with them again.
Maybe you mean orgasms? As Woody once said, "The worst one I ever had was right on the money."
@portmanteau., the key is in your disclaimer; same page, etc.
@portmanteautally: This is an important point to make, yes. But sometimes? It just ain't gonna happen and it's better for everyone involved to employ a dramatic-but-not-too-dramatic "OH GOD OH GOD" and get that shit over with.
I agree, per usual, with jolie and kitten.
Yeah, agreed…I guess it's been too long since I was single and carousing. and sometimes you just want to get it over with and not have a repeat.
One of the bonuses of being monogamously committed is that either of us can just say "fuck it, it's elusive this time, let's go watch Treme instead" and nobody's feelings are hurt. We know we're both capable of barn-burning sex with each other, just not today.
jolie's example actually does hit the majority of my past insinuations on the head, although I got caught on the original language of 'bad sex,' which seemed like sex that is offensive in approach, as opposed to unsuccessful. also, @portmanteautally? you sound like a .. happy person. siigh.
Exactly, portmanteautally! This "fuck it, it's elusive" attitude seems to be especially important as you age and gravity/kids/to-do lists/whatnot take their toll.
Don't ask, don't tell. Really, don't ask.
My theory is that those with partners are the most likely to feign orgasm and that subway masturbators are the least likely.
When guys fake do they use a turkey baster?
Condom.
Well, that is more practical.
But less dramatic. Approach sex like Gob Bluth and you'll have more fun.
Also, there are times when we orgasm just to get it over with.
Like "yeah this is C-grade so let's end it now."
Orgasm by fiat as it were.
Just spit on her back.
Ha! And eww.
I only fake orgasms with myself. That way nobody's feelings get hurt.
I'm faking interest in this post right now. Can't you tell?
{A conversation from last week}
Kimberly Cowser: I don't get these girls who are scared of guys who actually know how to pleasure them?
Me: Having good sex is a matter of education and refinement. They probably don't like modern art either."
I never fake because dammit, I want that other person to know they fail at satisfying me.
This may be why I've been divorced twice.
P.S. +1 for the van Meegeren picture.
To paraphrase Maakies:
"Oh, I can give her an orgasm… just not so's she likes it."