Friday, March 12th, 2010

The Night Lady Gaga Blew Up the Internet with 'Telephone'

2Natasha: Can I ask you something?

Choire: Yes!

Natasha: Do you 'get it'?

Natasha: Like Gaga overall.

Choire: I *largely* get it. I mean, obviously I groove on the, I guess, excitement level? And I don't despise the music, although it's remarkably unremarkable. But I get it!

Natasha: Good! Let's talk about this videeeeoo.

Choire: You mean: the night the Internet exploded?

Natasha: The night of broken Internet glass. Did it shock you?!

Choire: Part of the excitement with this Important Short Film was that everyone was sort of group-excited? Like pockets of Twitter were going "kablammo" and definitely all of Tumblr that wasn't talking about racism was like "UM TELEPHONE"?


Natasha: Which in itself is pretty mind-swaying is as how this is over a MUSIC VIDEO–a medium which was sacrificed largely by its maker

Choire: And not one made by actual prisoners in the Philippines or whatever. There's one thing that happened last night.


Tom Scocca: I have not even watched.
Choire: Is a Tarantino pastiche mostly?
Tom Scocca: So… pastiche pastiche?

Choire: Which: right. So can we start with talking about Tarantino??? Who you and I are both largely on the same page about which is: yes please, QT.

Natasha: So a Tarantino pastiche–about ladies.

Choire: Right, the lady element is key. And I do wonder why the video is sort of like way more than just a tribute to Tarantino??

Natasha: So you have the pussy wagon, the girls bent on vengance, the kind of altered state feel of the whole thing a-la- Natural Born Killers–

Choire: Um and you have the HAIRDO on Beyonce from Death Proof, etc. On and on.


Natasha: Tarantino visuals are kind of a lingua franca to the youth organically.

Choire: Because your generation grew up all on him?

Natasha: Yep exactly. But what I think offsets everything, in a good way, is the LADYNESS of it.

Choire: Yes! That's what's I love and also what takes us back to Madonna again.

Natasha: She resonates with the ladies so furrriously. I think that it's largely because she comes out of theater instead of being a recording artist. The one way to snap your audience awake is by being grotesque. In the traditional sense of the term. Outrageous and over the top. Transgressive. And speaking of trans!

Natasha: The girl on girl trope is so tired but here we have here surrounded by surly dykes, leathery cholas, and forbidding black ladies. So here's where it gets transgressive because unlike say Madge, who leaned over and kissed Britney on a "GEE ARENT ME NAUGHTY" trip.

Picture 21

Choire: Well, you know, I *just* looked through Madonna's 1992 "Sex" book the other day. Because we found the opened and the unopened copies in the back of the closet. (Which: LOL, gays!)

Natasha: Were you scandalized?

Choire: Oh America came to a standstill back in 1992. I mean it was on the TV and stuff and there was "shock."

Natasha: Tell me what is was like the Before Time, Pa.

Choire: Well, you must not forget that people were enraged about "Beavis and Butthead."

Natasha: How do the "Sex" and "Telephone" compare in terms of visuals?

Choire: A WHOLE LOT of the imagery we're seeing in today's Very Important Video is not that different? Weird race spectre stuff, lesbian hot making-out, bondage, etc. etc. The thing I like more about the Gaga video is the color super-saturation and the timely updates. Also the Steven Meisel stuff in the "Sex" book was all very "arty"? Like, post Bruce Weber arty? Which didn't age particularly well. And "Telephone" might not age well but it does look very NOW. And it's more camp and outrageous and jokey, I mean, SMOLDERING CIGARETTE EYEGLASSES, which, I am still LOLing. The Madonna book was sometimes humorous but it was never like "HA HA SUCKA!"

Natasha: Yeah, what the Video definitely had was our Black President calls the fierce urgency of NOW-WOW! To it. I'd also say that while "Sex" was a scandal it was all highbrow.

Choire: Oh yes. It was Very Upscale.

Natasha: Like it was, here's a serious art piece libertine adults could put on the coffee table. Where as this is sticky crude pop–in the tradition of Tarantino. Like YAAAAYYYYY GET CRZYYY ON YOUR (VIRGIN MOBILE) TELEPHONE!! Let's talk about GaGa as a sex symbol. Because I think that's what makes her so important that she 1) actually does something different 2) and what she does is scary and exciting.

Choire: You know, Madonna spent most of the early 90s dealing with her trademark. She tried to get Club Madonna, the famous strip club in Miami Beach, to change its name; when she started Maverick Records, she paid a band called The Mavericks $25,000 for the name; she got into it with Madonna Jewelers for the trademark of the name. And I cannot EVER see Gaga being involved in something like that? She seems more like a cult leader than a business entity, and that's where Gaga is more interesting to me (despite maybe being a worse musician???) and what keeps her scary and funny and fun.

Natasha: Yeah. Her music is unremarkable. Except it is perfect dancing in your bedroom music for girls. Which is something we all do.

Choire: Sure we do! Look, that product is EAR CANDY. What's amazing though is that if you listen to Britney Spears' last two records, the production is radically more inventive and challenging than Gaga? And yet Britney is dullsville.

Natasha: This is where I think the theater thing matters. She's a performer first. Not a PR construct. Also, there is so much more honesty in GaGa's game.

Choire: Well she's her own construct. And sure, from Day One: Fame Monster, hello. Wait, can I tell you my fave thing about the video? Speaking of transgression? It's from the director's Wikipedia page: "Jonas Ã…kerlund was a Masonic member of the Swedish black metal band Bathory from 1983 through 1984 and openly worships Satan."

Natasha: You see, people take the Viking Metal Genre for granted. It's at their own peril.

Choire: FOR REAL.

Picture 22

Natasha: I think the reason why people, espesh, ladies of their mid twenties, are excited about Gaga as much as they are…


Natasha: …is that we matured during the Britney Days.

Choire: Oh, because you were all raised on crap and Nickelback!

Natasha: Madge was already brittle and creepy and a fading icon.

Choire: Whereas we had Kate Bush.

Natasha: Snd so here comes Gaga who has the kind of shamelessness of a reality tv star. In the sense that she's like "BOOM. MAKE ME FAMOUS." Which seemed a taboo thing in the before Britney? Who was like, "I just love to sing yall (covered in oil, grinding on a giant snake." And not only that but instead of the virgin slut bullshit.

Choire: I guess at least you guys had Tori Amos. But right. None of the "girls" in your time were allowed to be like, MAKE WAY BITCHES. Or be like, "I'm a horny lady!"

Natasha: We get the pain/pleasure. scary / twisted. And Tori was for Wiccans at my high school.There was Garbage and Manson. But every one was trying to hard to build their brand on shock or being an outsider. The triumph of GaGa is how mainstream she is.

Choire: The time now was right. And that stuff plays very well on Long Island, "IN DA CLUB."

Natasha: And ultimately, she clearly doesn't think girls will run screaming if she frenches a leathery dyke!


Natasha: AND as a fan? That makes me feel good! Gaga trusts me! Gaga ain't talking down to me! Gaga knows I like it rough! BECAUSE MOST GIRLS DO!

Choire: *runs, hides*

Natasha: **eats blood**

Picture 23

Choire: Well what seems great to me is that the lingering effects of Riot Grrrl are still with us. Like this video wouldn't have been set to dance music 15 years ago! But then it also wouldn't have co-starred who I guess is the MOST POPULAR SINGER of our day? But when you look at it, everything in it is punk, from the Klaus Nomi outfit in the "strutting down the jail" scene, to the chains, to the vinylwear, reminiscent of the late great Poly Styrene and company.

Natasha: And yet it maintained the girly fantasy aspect of it– like some half clad broads running around in bras being BAD.

Choire: Totes. And more ephemerally, the "attitude." Also you know KILLING EVERYONE. Ha. But can we talk about Beyonce? Because that part is baffling to me!

Natasha: Yes B is, how we say, PROBLEMATIC.

Choire: She has always been so image conscious? And always willing to rip her kit off down to panties basically, but you know, "classy"-like.

Natasha: What I find interesting is the GROWL. Like she can do that empowered black woman angry growl? Snd she does it on the track. But she has no VISUAL GROWL. Fierce but not scary.

Choire: Because she's sort of winking and backing away. She's the good girl who hangs out with the bad girls sometimes.

Natasha: She's not ugly and doesn't know how to be. And let's be honest. Gaga is average looking.

Choire: OH sure. That's why I like her. I mean she's emaciated. And she cleans up real pretty. But she's One of Us. (Not you, honey, you're gorgeous.)

Natasha: Oh I'm mistaken for Beyonce all the time. But Gaga, she does her make up like broken cabaret dancer! A woman on the edge! In a society that is falling! I also love the cyclical nature of her videos.

Choire: Well right, she loves drama. All she wants to make are dramatic moments. My problem with the Gags is that she's all tableaux? And hence there's some cyclicalism, yes.

Natasha: Like she's angry! She's kissing! She's dancing! She's making food! She's killing!

Natasha: Which for ladies, is how WE FEEELLL. We don't feel like Britney crucified by our own fame.

Choire: I have always wondered What It Is Like For A Girl. (In your Rhythm Box, etc.)

Natasha: It's like that! We have cycles!A vibrant pastiche of emotions!!! That can kill!! So I think that's why she resonates so much. I feel like she gets lady-ness from the inside and then paints it with fashion and music and images. Also, QUIT CALLING ME IM DACINNNNN'. And poor Yonce, who is a dynamic performer and force of her own, seems stilted and two dimensional. Because, well, she kinda is!

Choire: But she's the Actressess!

Natasha: Oof please. Let's talk about the 'acting.' It was so John Waters to me! Beyonce is no good. But the dialogue, the super unnatural way it was delivered, the cheesey lines…. It was all so Crybaby.

Choire: You mean: Broad Strokes? But most of that was Tarantino too? A little John Waters? Where they meet, in camp heaven? My favorite stilted camp part is Gaga waiting tables, just standing there. Like, GREAT BRECHTIAN ACTING.

Natasha: YES!!!!

Choire: Hence the countdown in German? IDK!

Natasha: ALL BRECHT ALL THE TIME!! There is that 90's vitality that they've exploited, without feeling retro. It feels new.


Choire: Could you do me the favor of rating your top three Tarantino movies in order?

Natasha: This is like my Sophie's CHOICE!!

Choire: "LOL"

Natasha: 1. Pulp, 2. Inglorious, 3. Kill Bill 2.

Choire: I don't think we should ever talk again!

Choire: Mine goes: 3. Inglorious Basterds 2. Death Proof 1. Jackie Brown

Natashia I think what the Tarantino and gaga have in common is that an angry woman, a jilted woman, bent on doling out justice to those who done her wrong is something the two get and show well and seem to believe that women have a higher moral authority. So when they got done wrong, they do bad! Snd not bad in the 'oops my bras showing spank me' way.

Choire: Yeah, that coy little girl BS.

Natasha: But bad like put me in jail and pump iron with cholas and then go on a glorious blood soaked rampage. THE SANGUINE SEX.

Choire: Finally, I do find something angry making: that they promise "to be continued." Cuz you know that is a lie.

Natasha: They repurpose the pussy wagon! I believe that they will! I think this just means future collaborations, if Yonce can keep up (doubtful). I'm seeing Rihanna as a drifter, with John Mayer's sacrificial head on a spike. Also, one last thing, and I'm not sure where it fits in, but girls want to be famous. It's the same reason as teenagers we stare at ourselves for hours in the mirror, and make photo collages on out notebooks, and tend so diligently to our MySpace pages.


Choire: Isn't that about "attention"?

Natasha: Beyond that. We want an audience. An adoring audience. This is something a lot of girls grow out of. But I think it's a very teenage desire.

Choire: You were all jeals of the lonelygirl.

Natasha: MMMHMMMM But the kind of fame Britney had? That was terrifying and not real. Something about the way GaGa does it makes me feel 15 again lip synching in the mirror and pretending there's an audience on the other side.

Natasha: I just realized that's what my Tumblr is.

Choire: Well of COURSE that's what EVERYONE'S Tumblr is!

Choire: But also this kind of fame? It involves your skin being scrubbed digitally in every single frame, because, MAN.

Choire: And anyway yeah, what do you people think you're doing on the Internet? You're starring in your own music video!

Natasha: Jerking off on Chatroullette?

Natasha: Oh one more thing. What did you think about the dick joke? And how the dick rumor is still like the favorite gag of a certain website

Choire: Oh, I enjoyed it, though I thought it wasn't narratively consistent with the clearly delineated lesbianism of the matrons? I have a lot of thoughts on the rest of that whole issue which I plan to put forward at a later time! It is, as they said in the 90s, "problematic."

Natasha: I think that reaction to her is the strangest.

Choire: Well and it's pretty obviously phobic right?

Natasha: Yes! And a testament of how she's grinding up against sexual norms that make people uneasy while selling millions of records. Pretty spectacular.

Choire: In the end? The fashion in this video is IMPECCABLE.


Natasha: OH. BEYOND.

Choire: And that's sort of all I care about!

Natasha: I see all movie fashions" Chinatown, Dr. Strangelove, Rocky Horror Fishnets–then the high concept hats!

Choire: It's ALL good. There is nothing in there that is not good. And that's the true victory of this joint.

Natasha: Yes. It belongs to the ages.

121 Comments / Post A Comment

Sablesma (#1,244)

First, for context, I am straight and 24 years old and a male. Lady Gaga, previously, was mostly not on my radar and, honestly, made me feel a bit like an old. But last night! I watched this video, and there you go, I was FEELING IT.

I suspect that maybe I do not need to go back and look at what she has done before, but rather I feel like I should just keep an eye out for more like this in the future, because, as has been said: it's not the music. Is this right?

hazmathilda (#839)

Straight 24 years old female says watch the video for Paparazzi too:

Not only is it her initial foray into serial-style short movies for music videos (right?), it's her best song.

barnhouse (#1,326)

SO agree about best song. Lab-rat-on-cocaine replay song.

Feeling is the first step!
She's an orphaned theater kid first. I think her music is a by product of her performing rather than the other way around?

sigerson (#179)

Hey, no credit to Oliver Stone??? Think of the smashcuts and oversaturated color from Natural Born Killers and the kind of angry transexuality you can find in the Kennedy movie, like when Kevin Bacon as the convict Willie O'Keefe says, "YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT 'CAUSE YOU'VE NEVER BEEN FUCKED IN THE ASS!"

QT is awesome and Inglourious Basterds is a work of genius (clearly better than anything else he's done) but he has never understood transgressive sexuality.

sigerson (#179)

I mean, QT wrote NBK, but Stone was the director and has to be recognized as a primary source.

mrschem (#1,757)


HiredGoons (#603)

Quentin disowns that film and hated it, which makes me dislike him a bit more than I normally would, which is still somewhat.

I haaaaated that flick. TEAM QT!

HiredGoons (#603)

@DorothyMantooth: All right girl, it's on.

No one probably cares what I think about this, but ahem, I might provide some value since I am coming from so vastly different a perspective. I do not really listen to her music, though I like Pokerface and that Dance one well enough. I had never seen a video by her and all the red carpet photos (and the one performance at the Grammys) just left me baffled. All that I'd seen definitely came off as thought through, though, and is probably why I never put her into my own internal "joke" file.

The internet buzz last night was crazy so I eventually had to watch the video and… I was fascinated. Even though I still had no idea what was going on through parts, I watched the whole thing enthralled. Visually stunning, yes. The song…um, did not like, especially compared to the previously mentioned tracks I have heard. To summarize, she has somehow managed to resonate with an absolutely disinterested outsider, despite a song I don't even like. I think the QT aspects of the video have a lot to do with that, but her inherent "interesting-ness" cannot be downplayed. The "I'm doing whatever the fuck I want" aspect I love. [also, breadphone!]

sigerson (#179)

Which leads me to suggest that you very closely examine the upcoming Wall Street sequel. Or at least read Dealbreaker's commentary on it. THAT is going to be very NOW.

deepomega (#1,720)

I just can't get my head around her! Gaga feels like a robot programmed and built by other robots who have scanned blogs about gender-bending and theater and fashion and clubby lectro? Heartless! Soulless! Sponsored by cell phones!

katiebakes (#32)

Ooh, this is a total day-maker, although I refuse to admit that Beyonce was anything less than perfection and lalala I can't hear you. (Choire makes a good point: her delivery, while wooden, doesn't sound all too dissimilar to any of, say, Darryl Hannah's lines.)

Which brings me to:

3. Inglourious
2. Kill Bill 1
1. Kill Bill 2

(Ooh, I like the little charticle of "Recurring Collaborators" on QT's Wikipedia page!)

deepomega (#1,720)

I haven't seen IB yet but I just want to throw in

3. Death Proof
2. Also Death Proof
1. Reservoir Dogs

thatsrealbutter (#2,095)

Beyonce: Her BANGS. I want her to keep that hairstyle forever.

Bittersweet (#765)

I'm with you, katie – B can do no wrong, and this video opens up a slightly more transgressive version of B that I kind of like and want to see more of.

katiebakes (#32)

Also, the actual song has parts that are soooo The Way I Are, no?

misterpearce (#3,159)

Lady Ga Ga is like a fresh breath of raunchy air in the current music scene.

rodtownsend (#3,285)

If one limits oneself to the radio, perhaps.

rodtownsend (#3,285)


Give me some Florence and the Machine or some Roisin Murphy but this is pretty mediocre.

Abe Sauer (#148)

Right? I finally watched this and from the get go I was all "So Dave LaChapelle directed this and he's aping Tarantino like he was, ahem, aping the Lebron/Gisele Leibovitz VF cover when he show GaGa with that black guy near a volcano." But it seems now somebody is doing Lachapelle doing Tarantino… meta.

Also, re: Madonna and "Sex:" It should be noted that one of the reasons that book was "shocking" to joe sixpacks was because it came at a time when Madonna crossed the line into other areas of American culture, such as fucking both American Actor Hero Warren Beatty and American Sports Hero Jose Canseco. GaGa has made no such crossover.

FURTHERMORE: Madonna fucked a black Jesus Christ in a video that included no other "transgressive" suggestions because it did not need to. OVER 20 years later that video is STILL more transgressive than everything GaGa has done combined. (OH! To make the example even more relevant, the elderly here will remember that the Like a Prayer video Afro-Jesus fucking exploded Madonna's Pepsi tie-in endorsement deal… GaGa's corporate sponsors clearly fear no such problem.)

wb (#2,214)

Abe Sauers understands the Real America. Gaga ain't got shit on Madonna.

wb (#2,214)


Also, Like a Prayer was actually a pretty good song.

BoHan (#29)

Wow Abe. You are a hidden old school gay. Praise be to you. OK, this GAGA thing. Beyonce is her perfect companion. Because unlike Britney or Madonna, neither can dance worth a fuck. Every shot in this video of Gaga and Beyonce does no more than 2 beats of an 8 count before they MTV it to the next flash. Mediocre music, shit dancing, flashy production not of their own making. It's just fucked. Madonna was out there. And it was insane. Wake me when Gaga puts out a book in which she's photographed hitchiking naked down the 101 or boning Vanilla Ice. All that was shocking. And then Jesus, 20 years later.

oudemia (#177)

@rod: All love to Roisin Murphy, whom Gaga has clearly tried to skin and wear.
Like so.
@BoHan: Hooray! for recognizing that Britney really can dance better than 99% of popchicks.

egad (#1,355)

Thank you!

Roisin was doing it better looong ago. And is still doing so. One of my favourite comparisons:

Also, the hats? Isabella Blow is the one who really rocked those.

I don't get the Gaga thing at all. None of it is 'avant garde' at all.

*rant ends*

egad (#1,355)

@oudemia Pfffft I should click other people's links before posting my own. Sorry.

metoometoo (#230)

So, like, I love Lady Gaga. I listen to her music on my iPod and watch her music videos while I'm on the elliptical and sing her shit into my hairbrush in front of the mirror and "heart" all the pictures of her on Tumblr. And "Telephone" is one of my favorite Lady Gaga songs, and I was so so so excited for the video.

And I'm a little bummed. Not because the video isn't awesome, it is. But the reason I like the song so much is that it has a little bit of a built-in narrative, and when I listen to it I picture Gaga and Beyonce at the club dancing with drinks and phones in their hands. And so, not to be super pedestrian, but I kind of just really wanted to see a video that actually had to do with the song. It's cool that she wanted to make a crazy insane ridiculous short film basically, but I wish she would have used a different song or written a new song specifically for this, instead of just using "Telephone" because it happened to be her next single that didn't have a video already. :(

sox (#652)

i agree so much with the visual of the song and The Way I Are applicability of it – that's what makes for me too!

but on the note of emaciation, i hope this poor girl doesn't end up too effed to do what she's doin just because she's more malnourished than the versace girl.

buzzorhowl (#992)

All the comments about Lady Gaga being emaciated strike me as ironic in light of the fact that maybe three months ago there was all this online-gossip talk about how she looked fat during the "Paparazzi" shoot and the directors had to "hide her problem areas" and all that sort of crap. []
And now everyone's saying she's emaciated. Goes to prove that nothing she does will be pleasing to everyone.

rodtownsend (#3,285)

Also, over on my website, I have to admit that this video's prominence EVERYWHERE today sort of led me into a writing paralysis as we have only one rule: Only write about things you love. It's hard when all the children are telling you to love the new puppy, but all you can see is the shitstain that it just left on the rug.

barnhouse (#1,326)

Echo of Choire's QT lineup for me.

The only thing I disagree with is the power of Lady Gaga's songwriting skill. It is supreme, viscerally irrefutable. Even if your legs are broken you will throw that wheelchair across the room miraculously healed and DANCE RIGHT NOW. And she can sing, which please. Madonna?! Yoicks.

the teeth (#380)

One hundred times YES to the songwriting thing. I find it a little baffling, how routinely her songs are dismissed with something like "utterly pedestrian, if insanely catchy." No, they aren't very interesting, but the best ones are damned near Perfect. ("For What They Are.") Which is awfully impressive. How many people are out there trying, and failing, to make perfect catchy pop tunes?

metoometoo (#230)

Agree agree agree!

Bittersweet (#765)

Yes, barnhouse, YES! We're not talking about High Art here, or even indie songwriting. And she really can sing, which is more than I can say for either Madonna or Britney.

Liked the "smoldering cigarette eyeglasses" and the reference to the X-Ray Spex. But I'm not seeing "pastiche" as much as thoughtless ripoff. How good, how "fresh" can something be that owes so much to so many? "Now", yes. But not fresh.

sox (#652)

I read this as smoldering cigarette "eyelashes" on the first run and since I haven't seen the video, the image in my head was pretty amazing!

gosh im at work, but ill say v quickly. kill bill 2. is n01. pulp fiction feels so old. like remember vhs!? old. thats why im sticking with kb1 as n02 and then reservoir dogs, still so tight.

thatsrealbutter (#2,095)

Karl! Why have you not sent this comment via fax? (Could not resist)

I really hope that Phone Hair becomes the newest thing. Can't you just see Miley Cyrus rocking it on the red carpet when she accepts her Oscar for Last Son– [*soul explodes*]

Spencer Lund (#2,331)

This isn't important at all, because she is already an icon in my eyes (and everyone called me an idiot for falling in love with her during the "Just Dance" video), BUT an acquaintance of mine slept with Lady Gaga when she was in high school. He wasn't lying because I checked up on where she went to high school, and they definitely ran in the same crowd.

I am going to regret mentioning this on the Awl comment board after such a great post, but he told me there were olfactory issues in her nether regions. Maybe that's why she's celibate.

Pretty sure I'm not gonna be allowed to comment here anymore, but I had to tell this anecdote to someone.

GTFOH. Pics or it didn't happen.

myfanwy (#1,124)

Let me just say, as a woman, and former high-school girl, that rare is the woman who has not encountered "olfactory issues" in her "nether regions" at some point in her life. Unless you mean that she can smell with her vagina, which is awesome.

Internet rumors are always true. Did you know the president of France and his wife fuck around with other people?

MikeBarthel (#1,884)

God help her if she can. Imagine having to walk around all day getting direct whiffs of, like, subway seats and sewer grate emanations.

bb (#295)

I basically feel like any dude who would say that hates women. so put that brilliant tidbit back in your pocket, count.

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

Exactly. That comment in particular is part of the three way step from straight to gay, with a stopover at boyishly built Asians.

djfreshie (#875)

My 3 cents:

Firstly – Kill Bill 1 is better than Kill Bill 2, solely due to the fact that Kill Bill 1 so flawlessly made me and pretty much everyone else I've ever known completely sold on needing to see the follow up immediately. "I HAVE TO SEE THE REST OF THIS STORY NOW" was never not uttered by someone seeing KB1 for the first time. The second part was amazing. But the first was the just such a catalyst. With that in mind it is 3. KB2, 2. KB1, 1. Inglorious.

Second – I hear a lot about the fashion and design and direction of a music video, which I agree with. But the music IS the thing. And it is so trite it rips me apart. And I didn't dislike Bad Romance. This song is not good. Not awful. But then…just make a video then. There's no point to this. It is a pointless AND it sells a whole bunch of stuff, which I'm so against when you consider whoever made this thing probably could afford NOT to have it sponsored by Virgin. Virgin records probably made the thing in the first place. So leave your product shilling out please.

I think the whole thing is just bleh. All the stuff would have such a greater effect if the music WERE actually good (subjective opinion, obviously, but a lot of peoples seem to be on the same page.) It's not. It's an Avatar-esque aversion I think I have…fine, it looks really good. And maybe it says something about the future of the medium. But the content is so trite…so simple and meaningless…the subject matter is so copmletely borrowed from QT. We're free to use the word Pastiche, or Homage, or but I think this is just lazy. Mariah Carey has been doing 'Pastiches' of Michael Bay movies for years, and nobody seems to care.

Fredrick (#268)

I agree about KB1. It's all flash but the use of music alone is thrilling as hell and isn't really attempted/matched outside of the world of that movie.

djfreshie (#875)

There is no Kill Bill 2 without it! I respect the silliness of that argument, but what gets you so ramped up for the second half is the first. If the first half had been all Spaghetti Western too, it might be a different story. But the build up of it…it's just so flawless. The plane landing to Hirt's Hornet trumpet riff…and the realization that 'Oh, I'm not even going to see the revenge fully requited, am I?' you haven't even SEEN Carradine yet. So intense.

Fredrick (#268)

The song that plays when she gets her sword, then that plays again at the close…gets me every time. Like even without the conclusion, that's a good movie. Also when Sophie's arm gets chopped off and the music swells…campy as the movie is, that stuff is hard to pull off without being Obvious Music Cue about it.

djfreshie (#875)

Exactly…and yet, without the first half, would Kill Bill 2 have had the same effect? It was good for a lot of the same reasons, but then…the story just doesn't make sense. It's nice, but One is superior. THat is science fact.

HiredGoons (#603)

Norweigan Black Metal is fucking amazing.

HiredGoons (#603)

Norwegian, even.

Fredrick (#268)

I agree with so much of this (ever Sicha's favorite QT movies made me want to clap with gay-citement!) and, yeah, I felt like not acknowledging the dick-talk would've been a better route, because some people need her to have a dick, and no amount of flashing her cootch is going to change that.

Things people aren't mentioning:

1. "Natasha: The night of broken Internet glass." You mean Internacht?

2. "CHAINED HEAT", "CHAINED HEAT", "CHAINED FUCKING HEAT" Have none of you seen this cinematic gem? Grown-up Linda Blair, ftw.

3. This video is selling all that overpriced beats (headphones, laptops, etc.) equipment pretty hard.

4. Gaga has a pretty amazing ass. As an assman, I gotta give it up.

ElegantSlim (#3,812)


deepomega (#1,720)

Also, I hate to harp, but there's a difference between allusion and blind aping. There were so many shots here that were just aping awesome shit by tarantino, in a sort of Family Guy pop culture "oh shit I recognize that!!!" way. Let alone the stuff that they ripped from lachapelle….

hazmathilda (#839)

I can't be the only one who got a whiff of Russ Meyer off this, right? The powerfully sexual women whose revenge goes just a little too far, the desert, the car, and so on.

The fact that Beyonce let someone play with her persona like this is a testament to the power of Gaga in entertainment right now. I remember some people saying that her guesting on this track was incomprehensible, unnecessary, and a step down, and I think they were pretty wrong on all counts.

Also – I'm a Young, but is there a point of Youngness where you don't see the constant product placement as jarring and out of place? Like do some people see it as seamlessly integrated?

I don't think there is a campy drive-in B movie reference she missed.

No, all the products were still very jarring (though I might not be "young" enough?). I left a lot out of my comment above, when the server was freaking out, and that was a big part of it. With some time and reading these other comments, I realize taking the video all in (first exposure to her, for the most part) was a bit overwhelming. In my viewing, all the product stuff just became part of the…whatever…of the video, and the whole video was a little jarring.

Definitely with Choire on Jackie Brown. I kind of feel like QT tried to make his first real "mature" movie, people hated it because they just wanted more Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction, and so he went back to his increasingly obnoxious stylistic pastiche. It's like when a pop star tries to do a "serious" record, people hate it, so he either has to quit or go back to making the same crap that made him famous. Anyway!

As per Gaga. Don't like her music, but I totally "get" her thing, and I think it's great. It's like she ate and digested all that turn of the 90's lit-crit semiotics crap, and "interpretations of Madonna" bullshit, put it in a blender with Erasure, Britney Spears and Grace Jones, and out came this amazing fully-formed phenomena. I love it.

HiredGoons (#603)

I'm not huge on her music, but also 'get' her thing, and love it.

Baroness (#273)

I am so pleased too to see Choire chose "Jackie Brown" as his best QT movie.
Like you say, coming off Pulp Fiction QT could have done more of the same.
Instead he cast a not-young African-American woman- Pam Grier was so wonderful- and layered the story with grown up complexity and characterization, along with some intrigue and a great early 70's vibe.
Those dusty downbeat LA dives, it was noir in California sunshine, with affection for the sorts young QT saw..the atmosphere was very specific.
Great film. And it took bravery for QT to make it, I think. To tell the story he wanted even though it would be a hard sell and the suits wanted another hit like Pulp. Gotta give him that.

YES ON GRACE. Came here to make that same comparison. I certainly wasn't old enough to know and/or understand Grace Jones during her heyday, but I would imagine that if she had become a wildly successful mainstream pop singer, this is exactly what she would've done with herself.

As for this particular video, she had me at "Let's Make a Sandwich." Though I felt there could've been more craziness, but I guess there is only so much mediocre pop song to stretch out (this song is easily the weakest of her singles, to me).

Grace never had to work that hard for attention.

Abe Sauer (#148)

Also: It's funny that Beyonce has "Death Proof" hair b/c when I look at that I see "Sean Young Bladerunner" hair….

Abe Sauer (#148)

well, yes, CLEARLY. I was thinking in po-mo film terms.

missdelite (#625)

Lady Gaga doesn't fit the princess mold (a la Taylor Swift), so she's got no choice but to go balls-out-psycho-bitch-crazy with her image. I think it's getting to her head though, cause now she's all image and no music. Seriously, if the song didn't suck so hard, I would've watched the damn thing. Fortunately, I don't have 9 minutes to spare on pure tripe.

I like her but she is definitely the uggo chick putting out to be popular.

Bittersweet (#765)

But you gotta respect her for staying the uggo chick, and not, say, having 10 plastic surgeries in one day to fix the 'ethnic' nose, the small rack, etc.

evilfred (#2,351)

she's had a nosejob recently

evilfred (#2,351)

she's always been all image though… the first album was called "The Fame" and all the lyrics were about how much she wanted to be famous. i give her props for being completely straight up about it.

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

Define "props" in this context? Because her path to fame, whether she says it explicitly or not, has been the path of ALL PREVIOUS female performers to fame, which is to flash her cooch until we are sick of it. Sometimes her cooch is in leather, sometimes in tulle, sometimes in NOTHING, but it is still the same cooch-flashing technique first invented in the fucking Bronze Age.

cellular_bus (#3,024)

KB2 is infinitely better than KB1 for this reason: Spaghetti western > Kung Fu Anime.

wb (#2,214)

Ok, so if Jonas Akerlund was a Black Metal dude and worships Satan and had fellow Scandanavian Alexander Skarsgaard–of True Blood, of course–in his first Gaga video, then MAYBE ALEXANDER/ERIC REALLY IS VAMPIRE IRL.

HiredGoons (#603)


Joe Gallagher (#3,502)

Poly Syrene = very much alive. And I don't think her or Siouxsie Soux or any of the Slits or Sleater-Kinney would ever do something like this… so I gotta disagree with the Riot Grrrl/female punx points…

barnhouse (#1,326)

Nina Hagen might have done. Gotta say, I still love her best of all. Transgressive yes, but in the service of something well beyond that. Kickass politics, strange beauty, gender-neutral empowerment, AMAZING music and a baby named Cosma Shiva who is now evidently some kind of gorgeous German TV star.

KarenUhOh (#19)

I would've paid big $$ to see Carrie Brownstein in this thing.

I don't get the do you get it thing. What's not to get? She's easy math.
And I'm picking up 9 or 10 generations of pastiche/homage/ripoff/derivative. Did someone say Thelma and Louise?
Is it a gas? Yes, very much so! The music is not to my liking, the acting is bad but the outfits are Thrilling. Wild stuff.

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

I read the entire conversation between Choire and Natasha VC and I wondered if I was in the in-between world OF THE FRISKIES COMMERCIAL, because TARANTINO WHAT WHA WHA? All the visual references are PRE-TARANTINO, which Tarantino ripped off because he RIPS OFF EVERYTHING and has not had a single original idea in his ENTIRE WEASELLY FACED LIFE.

The visual references, with the naked ladies and the prisons and tough-girlness are clearly RUSS MEYER FASTER PUSSYCAT-type situations and there is NOTHING Tarantino-esque about it because nothing, in society, can be said to be Tarantino-esque because "things created originally by Tarantino" is a null set.

This is also the dumbest, shallowest possible ripoff of REAL Riot grrrl fair, like Thelma & Louise and the Betty Page 50s explosion of the late 1980s, and fonts of the 70s and production values of the 60s.

Also there are explicit references to Madonna – check out Gaga's makeup when she takes off her sunglasses – and that, first and foremost, is clearly where Gaga gets her inspiration and ideas.

You tell me this is original or fascinating or what and I CAN'T SEE IT because I'VE SEEN THIS BEFORE like a cluttered room full of antiques I've seen in other places, and people are YELLING like, "IT'S SO ORIGINAL AND FABULOUS BECAUSE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THEM TOGETHER IN THIS ONE ROOM."

I get GaGa but really there is nothing to get because she is not of much value. She is your basic Britney merchandising mannequin, except her merchandise (fashion) is much more upscale. And ALSO she is the OPPOSITE of feminine power because she is obviously a PUPPET of far more clever GAYS who just needed an appropriate way to get across this particular nihilist-but-fuzzy trend in fashion which HAS NOTHING to do with GAGA and EVERYTHING to do with people far, far, far cleverer and with vision about destroying this whole fucked-up societal view of gender. I mean, for chrissakes, even HER NAME IS A DRAG NAME. Can no one see?

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

I'm sorry but THEY COVER HER FACE and have her dance around in tiny leather outfits and DEFACE HER HAIR and PUT HER IN UNWALKABLE SHOES and the message is FEMALE EMPOWERMENT?


BoHan (#29)

Very, very Thierry Mugler. Dude hated women. But his men's clothing was so, so awesome. It's some type of twisted faggot revenge. And I love my Mugler checked blazer. Really, this was no more than "Freedom" without George Michael in sunglasses.

evilfred (#2,351)

She isn't just Britney. Britney was a creation of Jive Records and Max Martin. She could have been any girl off the street sexed up. Britney isn't creative, and a lot of her foundering has to do with the fact that she has no idea what she's doing and she has no control over her career.

Lady Gaga is the opposite in that she acutally has musical chops (youtube up her doing piano performances of her work), she writes her own songs, and she is in total control of her brand. She has her own coterie of fashion designers who make her her. She wears clothes that nobody else wears, or could even think of wearing (would Britney wear a Kermit the Frog head dress?).

And she isn't "sexy" in that cheap pop idol format. She's sexy in a raw, dirty way that isn't necessarily built for teenaged boys to fap to. She's sexy in a Russ Meyers, dominatrix, corporate powersuit way. She owns it and in complete control of her image. Note that she cowrote the video. She isn't being exploited here.

And she's fully aware of the trap of being viewed as a sexy girly idol. Check out the Bad Romance video and her distorted body. It's reminiscent of Aphex Twin in Come To Daddy, she's questioning the pop-tar aesthetic while playing the ultimate pop-tart, embracing it out of existence.

queensissy (#1,783)

The Gays run the Illuminati?

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

No no no it's not about an Evil Gay Conspiracy but rather the hallmarks of Gay Creativity and Vision (as in Mugler and indeed all couture and high-fashion) and Lady Gaga is merely a frontwoman for this PARTICULAR nihilistic view of gender and entertainment, which was created not by her but by far cleverer gays. Lady Gaga is like the biggest campiest hilarious-est joke of Britney and Madonna, like, what do those performers look like when we strip their self-esteem and personal hallmarks and all we have left is an all-too-willing clothes hanger, an average-bordering-on-unattractive girl who has no previous impressions of her own beauty and sexuality to conflict with her being a complete cartoon of feminine sexuality. Lady Gaga's image owes its due to the best drag queens in the business – the exaggeration, the showmanship, the makeup, the couture. It is a cartoon of femininity, and that's what this video is – a live-action cartoon.

But my main point is that Gaga should not be running around getting credit because, again, there is no Gaga – she is a 23-year-old who wants any way to get famous but had no idea how to do it. Instead, there are GaGa's Creators, and these are the people who innovated whatever it is we're looking at, and they have a separate agenda and message that little plain Stephanie Germanotta has ABSOLUTELY NO UNDERSTANDING of besides putting on the clothes she is told to put on and sell the records she is told to sell.

evilfred (#2,351)

Gaga started out as a nightclub act in New York. This is where she honed her skills. She developed her style, outfits, and image with her close friends in the Haus of Gaga. It is their creation. Stephanie Germanotta has a lot of understanding.

She was then hired by a record company to work as a SONGWRITER for other singers. She wrote stuff for Britney, Akon, etc. At a very young age.

Yes, she is inspired by drag queens, and she is a cartoon. So is Madonna, so is Tyra Banks. Is there something to be ashamed of in being inspired by men dressed as female caricatures? Do drag queens scare you?

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

I was following you until you got to wack moral judgments like "ashamed of" and "scare you" which are really more about your own anticipatory gay-discrimination panic and not about my point at all.

My point is that to claim, as our dear correspondents do, that Lady Gaga is in any way about female empowerment is LAUGHABLE. Gaga is not about feminine empowerment or gender empowerment; they are about Gaga Empowerment. To claim that Gaga's IMAGE is about female empowerment is also way off because she is the female simulacrum of a male drag queen masking female. Her image is no more about female empowerment than RuPaul is about female empowerment, or Paris is Burning is about female empowerment. Female has nothing to do with it, baby.

Also, to claim that Madonna and Tyra are cartoons of femininity is also to misunderstand what it is to be a woman (and by the way, to betray some misogyny); their entire careers have been about gaining power as an oppressed minority (the FEMALE one) and taking control of gender roles and self-esteem. They wear clothes, not costumes.

They happen to dress to elicit male sexual desire, but it would also be fine if they dressed to elicit female sexual desire. Gaga doesn't dress to elicit desire at all; she dresses as a concept. And the concept is "hobbling, chaining, being trapped." In her couture as in her music, GaGa's image is that of being trapped in a double life, unable to speak or be heard when she protests. Paparazzi is about hounding/being hounded to death, with free choice taken away from you, and the video ends in severe personal harm to her own body; Bad Romance is about being trapped in a unsatisfying relationship and WANTING that abasement and "disease," and the video ends with her burned on a bed, smoking a cigarette; Poker Face is about being trapped in an unsatisfying relationship and just closing your eyes and thinking of England to get through it.


It could be argued that Gaga's message of entrapment is a metaphor for drag queens, who also fight that fight of being unable to speak or express themselves without some consequences to their personal lives, about being trapped in gender constructs. In any case, the idea did not come from 22-year-old Stephanie Germanotta; it came from people far older, far wiser, far smarter about fashion and far more nihilistic and clever. It just also happened to come from people far more gay.

And then, don't even get me started on crediting weasel-faced artistic huckster (and former domestic abuser) Quentin Tarantino with anything approaching originality or female empowerment.

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

And also would like to add that Madonna and Tyra would not ever fantasize about personal harm to their own body as Gaga does because they really are about gaining feminine self-esteem while Gaga is basically the popular dance-music couture-clad version of a compulsive cutter.

DoctorDisaster (#1,970)

I was basically following your line of reasoning, until you tried to hold up Madonna and Tyra Banks as counterexamples. "They wear clothes, not costumes"? Conebras, anyone?

There is certainly an argument to be made that none of these women are empowering because they're all objectifying themselves on the altar of the Male Gaze, &c &c. To draw arbitrary distinctions between one famewhoring pop icon and another is beyond silly.

This all seems to boil down to the thesis that Lady Gaga is affecting a slightly different character using exactly the same methods and to the same end. She's more of a sub than a dom, I guess? Perhaps a little more abstract, a little less offensive? We're talking about distinctions between characters in the same play. The idea that "empowerment" limits the characters you're allowed to portray flatly contradicts itself.

Does that mean I think they're empowering? Not particularly. I'm just saying that they're all clearly playing the same game. You can't blast one of them for it while lauding the others.

Antonia Capet (#2,372)

Oh! But I can!

Because are you really saying that there is no VISUAL difference between Madonna and Tyra Banks and Lady Gaga? Surely you are not because that is a RIDICULOUS claim. A cone bra is not a costume! A cone bra is TRADITIONAL LINGERIE WITH A TWIST. Every woman wears a bra every day. No woman wears a mask every day.

Lady Gaga is not a LADY, is the big joke. She is an insecure, uggo post-adolescent girl who has the same problem as all insecure, uggo post-adolescent girls, which is the pathology of PLEASE LIKE ME. She is all about self-hatred, where Madonna is all about self-love (to the extreme.) And that becomes problematic when we talk about Gaga's Image because here we have a girl who hides her face (the being-yourself extremity), hides her hands (the doing-for-yourself extremity), hides her feet in "armadillo shoes" (the freedom extremity) and only FLASHES HER COOCH. Madonna flashed her cooch, true, but she was all about making the cooch empowered. Gaga flashes her cooch and it is the ONLY PART OF HER THAT YOU CAN SEE, LITERALLY, because the message of her image is that the PUSSY is the only thing about a woman that PEOPLE WANT TO SEE.

This is the opposite of self-esteem.

And let's go, for a moment, to the Gay Misogyny place, which is why I don't like Gaga. Gaga is problematic because she is a woman created by gays to be dressed as a drag queen, and yet she portrays herself as a victim (not just a sub, WHICH IS A ALSO GOOD INSIGHT, Doctor.)

Male draq queens would NEVER portray themselves as victims because the Drag Queen Bible has heavily quoted chapters on Self-Esteem and Self-Love and Empowerment and Fabulousness. As RuPaul said, being a drag queen is not about being a woman. Being a drag queen is about looking like a woman but RETAINING THE SOCIAL HIERARCHICAL POWER OF A MAN. Straight men love that too! That's why men as Milton Berle and Rudy Giuliani used to LOVE going in drag, because it was basically hilarious to them like being in blackface. Ha, ha, look at me, a man, take on the trappings of the weaker woman.

Because as much as I love the gays, and as much as gays love their hags, the uncomfortable underbelly of all the Liza-Barbra-Bette-Cher love is that these uggo ladies, while fabulous and Always Overcoming for Societal Acceptance and consistent with the gay storyline in those ways, also happen to be TOTAL lack of sexual competition to gays. These are women who are largely unattractive to straight men.

The underbelly of Gay Misogyny is women having to be Hot Messes, for the prime feeling of superiority. The only straight women portrayed as gay-friendly also have to be alcoholic, emotionally maladjusted, messy sluts who make the Gay Friend look Sensible. (Yes, I went to the Will & Grace place, but that's HARDLY the only example; look carefully at your own friendships). And that is Lady Gaga – crying, destructive, chained, and nothing more than a clothes horse for fashion. A woman willing to be the fabulous, blank, socially accepted carrier for the ideas of much smarter gays. PERFECTION. Because that is the entire couture/fashion business, right there. Let's not forget that gay men still think men are better. Their hierarchy is Straight Man, Gay Man, Woman. A gay man doesn't want a woman in charge any more than a straight man does. And with Lady Gaga, there's no threat of that.

Antonia, I disagree fundamentally with many of the points you've made here. But since you have made many, many points, and I have a woefully short attention span, the only one I'll address is re: Bad Romance. You got it wrong, sister! The point of the video is she's being sold into a harem, or prostitution ring, or something. And she eventually "acquiesces" to her, literal, "selling." But in the end? She burns up HER PIMP! NOT herself! If that's not a metaphor for NOT allowing yourself to be used as a mere pawn/object, I'm not sure what is.

DoctorDisaster (#1,970)

Visually there are differences because they come from different decades? And they wear different costumes because costumes are only shocking once?

Also, I am too lazy to Google, but I find it highly unlikely that in her entire career, none of Madonna's costumes has ever incorporated a mask. Also, if coneboobs are just a "twist" on bras, then masks are just a "twist" on daily makeup. Quite frankly, any element of costuming you care to name is a "twist" on some normal garment or accessory.

And the cooch-flashing argument really gets to the core of why I feel your argument is flimsy. Two women do exactly the same thing for exactly the same reason (attention), and you claim that one is disempowering and the other is empowering. This gives me the impression that you like one singer and don't like the other – a totally valid point of view! – but then try to project that into the realm of their cultural impact. I'm not willing to make that leap.

Your argument about gay misogyny I found interesting, just because that's a real cultural force that a lot of people are unwilling to talk about. But you seem to be aggrandizing Gaga's gay influences to the level of some Evil Mind Control Conspiracy while completely ignoring Madonna's equally significant debt to the gay culture of her time. Madonna benefitted from a huge, devoted gay following, and repurposed elements of gay subcultures to achieve mainstream success. Gaga does the same thing.

And I think you're taking the drag queen comparison way too far. Do both women incorporate elements of drag grotesque into their costuming and performance? Sure! But neither of them is actually a drag queen. To expect them to conform to some unwritten set of rules about what drag performances can incorporate is silly.

I guess I also come from a background outside top-40 pop music, where expressing negative impulses is a completely established part of the art. "Crying, destructive, chained" applies to an awful lot of great songs and albums (and, of course, probably ten times as many shitty ones). To say that an artist isn't allowed to touch on these themes isn't empowering; it's limiting.

LondonLee (#922)

Never mind Madonna, I can't believe you got through that chat without mentioning David Bowie. I just kept thinking about the end of this video

Baroness (#273)

Bowie's horrid old teeth are underrated as key to his glam success. Visible, physical decadence. Deep thought, and I am full of shit here.

ljoaquin (#3,990)

1. even if this is trying to be Quentin Tarrantino, how is it going to be if it's not shot on film. This was clearly shot on the RED camera.

2. What's with the Wonderbread product placement?

3. Brecht? The German shit is clearly some Fassbinder referencing. Gaga: the new Hannah Schygullah

katiebakes (#32)

I have zero idea what anything in #3 meant, but I greatly enjoyed it nonetheless.

I am a huge Fassbinder fan and beyond the 1,2,3 (and that is stretching it) got no RWF vibe. And if you are referencing RWF you might as well throw in Douglas Sirk's use of color. The conceit with this video is that it is referencing artists who are known for their references to earlier artists. Is there a German word for that?

poisonville (#776)


Ronit (#1,557)

I have a word for Lady Gaga

That word is mannerism

sajrocks (#2,067)

With chats like these, who needs dissertations? Lurv it! On the re-draft, be sure to work in Russ Meyer and Björk.

Jana Busbin (#3,993)

The post-massacre dance sequence screamed Hedwig and the Angry Inch to me.

RonMwangaguhung (#3,697)

Ultimate ear candy with a fairly long expiration date. Still loving the gaga

Owen Thomas (#3,994)

"You know, Madonna spent most of the early 90s dealing with her trademark…. And I cannot EVER see Gaga being involved in something like that?"


joeclark (#651)


Ern Malley (#3,733)

Has nobody seen the video when she was just a dumb brunette chick meat puppet, before she got transformed into a different meat puppet, on MTV's boiling points?

alexanderchee (#3,995)

Honestly, Beyonce as Black Betty Page rocked. She became like a hundred times more interesting. And should never have any other kind of hair.

Also, why has no one brought up Faster Pussycat Kill Kill in relationship to this?

latfbd (#3,997)

Gaga: DRAPES DO NOT MATCH THE CURTAINS musically speaking. She may be visually interesting, but lyrically this is horrid.

What's exciting is how this will play into the "Beyonce and HOVA are Satanists narrative." Aside from the obvious patina of bad behavior in the vid, the Bathory-guy-as-director opens a larger questions about the uses of satanism in the Jay-Z Beyonce cultural-household. Jay clearly knows what he's doing — you don't wind up with Crowley quotes on your T's by accident (or do you??? is the whole thing coming out of a bunch of satanic stylists on the loose???). But Beyonce… did she know about the director's satanism? Is she a willing participant or is she being tricked into it by savvier devil-worshipers? (GAGA) And more interestingly – what is this all about? Is it a big play so that in the inevitable dissolution off the the Yonce/ Jay brands she can come to Jesus? Or is that Jay's play? Who will come to God in this one?

katiebakes (#32)

I hope this all culminates in a hip-hopera.

joeclark (#651)

And: Singing in the mirror. Mr. JOHN SIMM portrayed Mr. BERNARD SUMNER in 24 Hour Party People. He admitted in an interview I now cannot find that it was a dream come true, since, as a "boy" (surely teen), he spent hours miming a performance of "Blue Monday" in the mirror.

rj77 (#210)

So I don't have any strong feelings for GaGa one way or another, but this:

I'm seeing Rihanna as a drifter, with John Mayer's sacrificial head on a spike.

I really want this to happen. Like really, really want this to happen.

sunnyciegos (#551)

I love the Madonna references, and think we may have (at last, after so many blonde strivers) found her true heir. But let's have a little perspective. Gaga is 23. At 23, Madonna had yet to produce her debut album, which was filled with fluff like "Borderline" and "Lucky Star." Gaga's worst single – let's say "LoveGame," because why not – is lightyears more advanced than Madonna at that same age. So when people get all "She's all performance and no chops!"* I just want to say, "Wait."

*plus I just totally disagree. She plays the piano extremely well and sings better than Madonna, Gwen Stefani and, oh let's say Cyndi Lauper combined.

balsa_wood (#465)

No one's talking about her technical chops. It's the songs. They're monotonous, forgettable, insipid, and intensely derivative. They all sound like readymade cell phone rings.

I get it. I don't like it. It'll pass. No big deal. Like Twitter itself.

Florence and the Machine FTW.

DoctorDisaster (#1,970)

I was on vacation, so I missed the internet blowing up. However, I did stop into a gay bar and this video played twice in about half an hour. The first time I barely paid attention, until a bright flash of yellow caught my eye and I was all "WTF is the Pussy Wagon doinOMG LET'S MAKE A SANDWICH"

balsa_wood (#465)

To Choire. Please ease up on the question marks. Please. It's hell to read. (Or, to write it your way, "It's hell to read?") You're not a sixteen-year-old in the Valley–you don't need to scoop up at the end of so many sentences. The question marks obscure the writing.

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