Wednesday, March 3rd, 2010
29

Super Size Everyone

hamburglarA blogger has put together a map that shows which fast-food chains dominate which smoke-choked highways of this vast nation. It looks like your normal heat map of the U.S.A. (complete with big lavenderish splat over Texlahoma that represents Sonic) until you realize: All that black space isn't neutral, but controlled by McDonald's. (It took me a few seconds, too.) [Via]

29 Comments / Post A Comment

KarenUhOh (#19)

Bullshit. That's the photograph I took of my placemat after the last time I ate at Sonic.

johnpseudonym (#1,452)

Culver's?

Abe Sauer (#148)

Seriously, There should be a giant colored corridor from Milwaukee to Madison

libmas (#231)

Whither Roy Rogers? Whither In 'n Out? And I'll second Culver's.

Multiphasic (#411)

I'm with the In 'n' Out love, except that this measures penetration by sheer topographical volume, not by quality or revenue or general smugness of aficionados. There really aren't that many In 'n' Outs, if you think about it; it's just that everyone on the West Coast knows where all of them are.

(also, with regards to Culver's, from looking at the menu, I'm reasonably sure everyone who ever ate there is now dead)

Bittersweet (#765)

Having just returned from a trip to San Francisco and tried In 'n' Out for the first time, I'm a definite convert. D'you think they could be persuaded to start an outpost in New England?

QueenWasp (#926)

I'm not dead yet! Culver's always seems like a good idea at the time. The cheese curds! The milk shakes! The root beer!

It quickly becomes clear after stuffing your face with delicious dairy products, deep fried and otherwise, that Culver's mere existence might be an act of terrorism against Midwesterners.

KarenUhOh (#19)

I've got an infrared overlay depicting Der Wienerschnitzel's penetration into the Los Angeles metroplex.

johnpseudonym (#1,452)

Yeah, I want two large Cokes, two large fries, chili-cheese dog, large Dr. Pepper, super deluxe, with cheese and tomato.

Onjay (#2,679)

Why do I find the thought of an infrared overlay showing penetrating wienerschnitzels just a trifle daunting?

Multiphasic (#411)

Or to put it another way, if Der Wienerschnitzel really wanted to get anywhere in L.A., it should let someone else do the penetrating.

LolCait (#460)

Sonic Burger really should have used a towel or a tissue or something. What a mess.

Abe Sauer (#148)

Obviously stunning. But a tad misleading on the mcdonald's end. I'm lookign at western north dakota "dominated" by mcdonald's and I can promise you nothing dominates western north dakota except bitter fucking cold and shale oil wells. I suppose mcdonald's dominates that area simply because you can actually probably get mcdonald's with a less than 100 mile drive but…

Onjay (#2,679)

Similarly West Texas. Not much dominant there except mad emus and snake shit.

Magister (#1,444)

I agree. It's a couple of cute maps and all, but he never defines "controlled" and as you mention about North Dakota, a lot of the Mountain West is in the middle of nowhere.

Heck, I used to occasionally comment somewhere that the town in which I lived in New Mexico had the only movie screen for 20,000 square miles and while that town also had one of each major fast food joints, nobody "dominated" and to find a competitor, you'd have those same 20,000 square miles.

TroutSavant (#1,990)

McDonald's has a monopoly in the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans, too.

Bittersweet (#765)

I'm really really hoping the maps are misleading, because even all the competitors combined have got nothing on the big black glob of McDonald's in the Northeast.

BoHan (#29)

DQ! Only decent place to eat in Marfa, or any other small Texas town.

Hey, were you in Las Cruces, too? We used to drive for 45 minutes to get to a fucking TGIFridays.

HiredGoons (#603)

There's a little purple dot up in Idaho where I once almost got arrested with a quarter ounce of weed.

KarenUhOh (#19)

Texas ordered a large Orange with its Sonic:

http://www.whataburger.com/one_store_locator.php?state=TX

Screen Name (#2,416)

Date: March 3, 2010
Project: Burger Map

Background: Imagine, if you will, the burger force – a field of energy that radiates from every freshly-cooked patty, earth-penetrating and inverse-squared with distance, compelling the hungry carnivore to seek out and devour the well-done ground beef at the source, all converted into a handy territorial guide reminiscent of a heat map.

Proposal: Now, take me, a typical American male in slightly above average shape who spends approximately 8-10 hours a day looking at the Internet. With the assistance of a documentary film crew, I propose for the next 30 days to do nothing but stare at this map to see how my body reacts to the stress of viewing the burger force. But, there's a catch! If the map shows a little magnifying glass with a plus sign on it, I will be required to click on it and supersize the map.

This experiment will be packaged as a documentary designed to highlight the poor quality of the average American's Internet consumption.

HiredGoons (#603)

I wait for these.

Like Wendy waits for Peter.

Technical error: "a typical American male in slightly above average shape" THIS IS NOT TYPICAL.

deepomega (#1,720)

FIVE. GUYS.

That is all.

Turns out Subway has more outlets than even McDonald's. Why do we not see the menace of these vile coldcutteries? Because they are a trademark of "Doctors Associates"?

petejayhawk (#1,249)

"Vile coldcuttery" is the best description of Subway I have ever heard. I am going to steal it now. Thank you.

You are more than welcome. I think it has something to do with Coldstone Creamery and the Simpsons Goodtyme Fundrinkeries.

HiredGoons (#603)

'Whither Roy Rogers' FTW.

Holly Hilton (#3,370)

Wow. I'm so hungry, I could eat at Arby's.

Any joint that sells single-people food like a french fry burrito (I'm looking at YOU, Der Weinerschnitzel!) doesn't deserve coverage on this map.

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