Thursday, March 4th, 2010

Religious Group Doesn't Know The Difference Between "Good" Attention And The Other Kind

Let us bow our heads and give a blessing of thanks to the Lord for providing us with such easy and mockable content. God truly is great!


13 Comments / Post A Comment

KarenUhOh (#19)

I got stoned at Sea World once.

Bittersweet (#765)

I don't see why the whale should be stoned, I mean, it didn't commit adultery…

sixlocal (#296)

When he raiseth up himself, the mighty are afraid: by reason of breakings they purify themselves. The sword of him that layeth at him cannot hold: the spear, the dart, nor the habergeon. He esteemeth iron as straw, and brass as rotten wood. The arrow cannot make him flee: slingstones are turned with him into stubble. Darts are counted as stubble: he laugheth at the shaking of a spear. Sharp stones are under him: he spreadeth sharp pointed things upon the mire. He maketh the deep to boil like a pot: he maketh the sea like a pot of ointment. He maketh a path to shine after him; one would think the deep to be hoary. Upon earth there is not his like, who is made without fear. He beholdeth all high things: he is a king over all the children of pride.

sixlocal (#296)

-Job 41:25-34

shaunr (#726)

The stoning's off. Someone's shown them Cockburn's article and stoning, apparently, is too good for what that creature did to a white woman.

What? It's not like the whale said "Jehovah" or anything.

oudemia (#177)

If we need to enact bible stories, maybe we can feed Jonah Goldberg to Tillikum.

HiredGoons (#603)

" So is this great and wide sea, wherein are things creeping innumerable, both small and great beasts. There go the ships: there is that leviathan, whom thou hast made to play therein. These wait all upon thee; that thou mayest give them their meat in due season."

-Bible (Old Testament)

myfanwy (#1,124)

Give us this day our daily meat.

shaunr (#726)

Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coffin warehouses, and bringing up the rear of every funeral I meet – then I account it high time to get to a marine mammal park as soon as I can.

mathnet (#27)

IT'S A WHALE, you idiots, not an ox.

EvilMonkey (#1,063)

This explains why my ancestors who settled in Puget Sound never could get a crop to come in. Every Orca they put to work in the fields inexplicably died, usually after eating one or two of the farm hands. They always thought that Orca's were allergic to farm hands. Yes, this explains a lot of things now.

EvilMonkey (#1,063)

(warning: the previous post contains a punctuation error involving inapproprate use of apostrophe… wait, the previous post IS and apostrophe, there, fixed)

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