Hey, what did I miss on my huge, three-day vacation? Oh yay, New York "has descended into a bizarre, riveting spectacle of corruption and political debasement"! (Politico also notes that "At this point, only two of the six statewide elected officials, Sen. Chuck Schumer and Attorney General Andrew Cuomo, were actually elected to the positions they hold.")
But also, oh noes, my three favorite running political stories have largely up and died.
Harold Ford realized that he was an idiot and couldn't be elected to dogcatcher. (OKAY SO LONG, ENJOY BEING A MILLIONAIRE.)
More upsetting to me, Charlie Rangel, no longer the chair of Ways and Means, is therefore also no longer one of the top five most influential politicians in D.C. and is apparently "sad, lost and alone in his own thoughts." (!?)
And then David Paterson is pretty much all done except for the resigning and/or just fading away. The Post is calling FreeYankeeTicketsGate "strike three," which is their code for "We expect a resignation."
What can we say? I guess 2010 will go down as having the angriest Black History Month ever, seeing as it apparently tried to take everyone down with it on the way out? Or you know, if I was just a tiny bit more conspiracy-minded, I'd see a conspiracy in this!
Four black governors in the US since reconstruction.
Unrelated question: What does a governor do, again?
Wait, you were gone?
Politicians are universally corrupt? The axe falls more swiftly on the African-American? Men take breakups harder than women?
We all need vacations.
Though I'm delighted to see you back, I'm going to miss your co-editor's Balk/Choire tumblr fanfiction to a ridiculous degree.
Yes!
Your first post back should be pictures of your brand-spankin' new calf implants. Or were you just in for a little lift?
YOU CAN'T TELL BEHIND MY HUGE SUNGLASSES.
According to Balk is was breast reduction. But I think that's just wishful projecting on his part. (THANK GOD YOU'RE HOME PAPA!!!!!!)
Work is therapeutic after surgery--helps to keep the mind occupied. Also, that office gets nice and cold, just perfect for diagnosing nipple sensitivity!
I heard that Choire was suffering from "exhaustion." Coupled with "dehydration."
And another condition known as "quotation marks."
Well, Choire's new calves are hot and all, but I'm still distracted by Rahm's prominent quadriceps.
They wouldn't let us report you missing for another 72 hours. The cops told us that bloggers run away all the time.
I seem to recall a crackerjack reporter somewhere wondering in print why Rangel's four rent-controlled apartments suddenly became an issue when they did, even though every political reporter in town had dined on Sylvia's catering in that apartment, year after year.
Also, welcome back, you look marvelous
It was totally payback from the Clintons.
Harold Ford is black? Next you'll tell me Obama wasn't born in Nairobi.
Yawn.*
* I grew up in Illinois.