Thursday, February 18th, 2010

Narcissist Knows Research Is All About Him

A study in awesomenessAdmit it, you like me. You like me a lot. What is it about me that you like? Oh, pretty much everything: my oversize self-confidence, my relentless charm, the way I get so worked up and passionate about things-even my deep despair, and my belief that no one hurts, no one really feels sorrow, the way I do. You can't help it, you're drawn to me. And that's fine, because I am pretty fascinating. Unfortunately, new research shows that eventually you'll tire of me. Just like all the others, your initial adoration will give way to exhaustion and disdain for the way everything I do is somehow centered around me. (Why shouldn't it be? I'm amazing!) It's a sorry state of affairs, and I'll be sad to see you go, but you know what? I'm fucking awesome. I'll make new friends. Because people cannot get enough of me. Anyway, that's my takeaway from this report, which was pretty clearly written with me in mind.

20 Comments / Post A Comment

mathnet (#27)

I'm done thinking about your GERD, Alex.

jolie (#16)

"Alex, I disdain you"

Last night, I had a dream that the hamburger on my plate was eating ME!

It's not you, it's me.

Looks like someone missed the part about narcissists wearing fashionable clothing.

Alex Balk (#4)

I'm cool enough that it's unnecessary.

HiredGoons (#603)

That whole thing about facial expressions, well fuck if I know.

"Imelda Marcos bought 2,700 pairs of shoes. She could've at least had the courtesy to buy a pair of ours. Lots of people do, for some reason. Like Alex Balk!"– Kenneth Cole

sailor (#396)

Or at least you think you are, which is all that matters, eh?

You're so vain
You probably think this comment's about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this comment's about you
Don't you? Don't you?

HiredGoons (#603)

Why should I care, Alex Balk? What does this have to do with me?

dado (#102)

Unless it's Madonna we're talking about.

lululemming (#409)

I like you because of your "more trendy haircuts". SCIENCE!

KarenUhOh (#19)

I'm sorry. You are?

So, this is actually more or less what my dissertation is about. So I guess my dissertation is technically about you or something?
Anyway I hadn't seen this article yet, so thanks for doing my homework for me, I guess. Seriously, this is the servicey-ist The Awl has even been for me. GET OUT OF MY BRAIN, BALK!

tralafel (#1,221)

Exhaustion and disdain? They're just JEALOUS.

barnhouse (#1,326)

But what if I never ever tire of you, Alex Balk? What then?

You're buying me tires? Sweet.

Stop Okay Go (#365)

Sorry if this is a repeat comment; am not a regular commenter here.

Somewhat in reply to tralafel…I've done a little (mind you, internet) research on this subject and one of the characteristics of a narcissist is that they think that everyone is jealous of them. While exhausting, they're generally harmless (too busy primping themselves) unless they have some anti-social tendencies spiked into their personality drink mix. 2c.

Also, Balk couldn't be a true narcissist. They never hide their faces in pictures. They LIVE for pictures.

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