Headline: “Obama insists he’s devoted to reviving the economy”
Deck: “Slipping in the polls, the president uses his eighth news conference to defend his economic agenda and accuse Republican of blocking measures in Congress.”

The right-wing press sure is going rough with the spin on Obama today, right? (Complete with copy error, of course. Republicans, you adorable bloggers.) Because they-oh, wait, sorry, that’s the front page of the Los Angeles Times website! (The New York Times, by the way, went with “Obama Presses Tax Cuts for Middle Class at News Briefing.”)

by Abe Sauer

A movement that’s rewriting the rules for politics is also rewriting new rules for fashion.

Clothing is an extension of your values, a sartorial statement of who you are as an American. And while you’re shouldering the rebirth of a nation’s glory, why not shoulder a smart-looking blazer in the process?

While Tea Partiers respect, more than anything, the freedom to wear what they like, there are some new essentials for the man looking to “restore honor” to America… and his wardrobe. Below, a selection of the Fall essentials for the Tea Partier dressing for the profession, the polls or the protest.

Wolverine Boots
These Made In America classics are equally good for stomping through snow drifts from an November Maine Nor’easter in order to cast a vote for Tea Party gubernatorial candidate Paul LePage as they are for stomping liberal guts. Forget Wolverine’s casual offerings and go straight to the work series. What is harder work than restoring honor to America?
Starting at $109

Don’t Tread on Me Tee
Barring the unmistakable Gadsden flag symbol, this comfortable Don’t Tread on Me t-shirt is perfect for mornings spent lounging around with a copy of the Wall Street Journal. There is no better version than that offered by the official don’t tread on me outfitters. Gadsden and Culpeper’s America Heritage Shoppe, Ltd. was founded after 9/11 in Albany, NY with the goal “to be America’s Official Don’t Tread on Me Outfitter by providing inspiring historical information, a wide variety of unique quality products and excellent customer service.” Made in the USA, the shirt is 100% cotton because being angry doesn’t have to mean being uncomfortable. [Warning: Don’t accidentally buy the “Don’t Teabag On Me” t-shirt created by liberal homosexual pornography website Wankette.]
$18.99

Vintage Carhartt
Nothing identifies you as ready to do the work that America needs like Carhartt. American, rugged, durable, reliable, just like your values, Carhartt was clothing the American work ethic before Roosevelt tried to dismantle the free market and it will be clothing it after Obama fails to do the same. But don’t buy your Carhartt new and rigid. Vintage is key. Shop eBay for some worn-in classic silhouettes. Vintage Carhartt jackets will turn any blue shirt and khaki combo into the uniform of a Tea Party Patriot.
Prices vary. Check eBay for latest.

Shredded Money
What better way to stand behind the belief that the Obama administration’s socialized overtaking of America is making the nation’s dollar worthless? Stuffed with shredded dollars from the US Federal Reserve, this handsome cigar pen is just as appropriate signing billion-dollar bailout contracts as it is singing foreclosure and Chapter 7 documents. Pair the unique pen with a set of shredded money cufflinks and you’ll be fashionable declaring your feelings on the economy as you move all your holdings into gold.
Pen $15. Cufflinks $50.

Patriot Ale
Powell, Ohio’s Liberty Tavern does not joke about freedom. A copy of the Boston watering hole that fueled the greatest independence movement the world would ever know, Liberty Tavern serves a special brew crafted by Sam Adams: Patriot Ale. And though they’ve got hummus on the menu, you have the freedom to not order it. Instead, try the “Betsy Ross Basket” (golden brown chicken tenders with fries and honey mustard) or the “Liberty Sticks” (funnel cake rods disused with cinnamon and powdered sugar… and freedom). Sorry though, you have to go to Powell for Liberty Tavern’s take on the American Dream.
Entrees start around $14 Monday Special: $4.50 for 23 sweet oz. Flight prices to nearby Columbus, OH vary.

Pocket Constitution
Including the Declaration of Independence, the Bill of Rights and all amendments, even pesky ones like the 14th, this handsome pocket edition of the world’s greatest document measures just 3.5″ by 5″.
Not only will you be armed against the tyranny of a government run amok, your smartly-bound edition will support the work of the Cato Institute, one of the world’s greatest advocates of “individual liberty, free markets and peace.” For globe trotters, it’s also available in Arabic.
$4.95; Arabic: $6.95

USS Ronald Reagan Hat
You may not be able to command your own Nimitz-class nuclear-powered supercarrier, but you can remind everyone that one represents your will as an American citizen. In honor of his greatness, Ronald Reagan was the first ever living former President to receive the tribute of having a Naval vessel named after him. And while you may not actually physically serve alongside the sailors of the Reagan, your spirit does. Leave it outside in the rain a few times to give it the look of a hat that’s actually seen military action.
$14.95

Anglo-Confederate Society Necktie
From the fine Ben Silver Collection in Charleston, this stately, cardinal red, navy blue and white-starred necktie was worn during the Civil War by British Parliament members to quietly express sympathy for the Southern cause’s war against central government tyranny. What better way to protest the current socialization of American liberties than to pair your work uniform with a little fetching bit of noble history?
$95

American Flag Socks
We’re all patriots underneath. Some of us are just more patriotic underneath than others. These fine socks float the American standard even if you’re waiting in the customs line at Paris’ Charles de Gaulle. Do you have something to declare? Oui!
$8

“Ballroom” Jeans
Nothing says I’m ready for work and relaxing like a pair of Duluth “Ballroom” Jeans. The extra crotch gusset space is perfect for carrying around the huge set of balls required to believe that Obama is a Muslim.
$34.50 / $39.50 tall

Ralph Lauren Purple Label Suit
Before Sarah Palin let her husband Todd take the stage to join her on the long journey of restoring honor to America, she got him the proper attire for such an undertaking, buying him three Ralph Lauren Purple Label suits. The Purple Label identifies this Lauren line as the ultimate expression of luxury for the modern gentlemen, no matter how throwback his politics are. While you may have no GOP coffer, you can dress like you do.
Starting around $4,000

You wouldn’t believe what Abe Sauer is wearing.

There is seriously something wrong with our society when we are trending #AbortionClinicPlaylistSongs ..I thought ScoobyDoo was bad but FUCKless than a minute ago via web

$eth Money
sethmoney

Everything about this.

Damien Hirst is in some hot formaldehyde these days. The secondary market for his works has collapsed by at least 93% in the last two years, and he’s been accused of plagiarism by Charles Thomson, artist and co-founder of the Stuckists, a British arts group that promotes figurative painting. The jocular pontifications of these Stuckists fall somewhere in tone between Viz magazine and Prince Charles yammering on about “traditional” architecture. Thomson weakens his case enormously by claiming, for instance, that Hirst’s “Pharmacy” was lifted from Joseph Cornell’s work in the forties. Which, of course, it was. The “quotations” of fine artists-concepts, techniques, poses, etc., lifted and remade over and over again-are the meat and drink of art historians, so deeply woven into the history of art that it is ridiculous to call them “plagiarism.”

Allegations that Hirst lifted the ideas and methods of other artists, notably those of Lori Precious, are far more credible, and have been public since 2007. Most interesting and strange, though, is the story of Hirst’s borrowings from the artist John LeKay.

The range and specificity of Hirst’s appropriations of LeKay’s work really are startling. Especially so, since the two were friends; Hirst hung around LeKay in New York between 1992 and 1994; they went out drinking and to openings, played beach-ball badminton in the living room together, etc. There is a pretty much comment-free comparison of several of the works in question on LeKay’s website. He has kept pretty mum about the whole business until now, though he told Juxtapoz explicitly that he won’t be seeking compensation from Hirst (because he is “more interested in Buddhism than material wealth,” apparently).

An aside: Hirst may have lifted such a wide variety of LeKay’s ideas in a spirit of homage, but he didn’t hesitate to sue a 16-year-old British collagist for making use of Hirst-derived images.

In 2008, over $270 million of Hirst’s works were sold at auction. The largest sale-famously conducted by Hirst directly without his dealers-was held on September 15th of that year; according to The Economist, the Russian kazillionaires were out in force.

Alexander Machkevitch, a Kazakh mining magnate with a taste for metallurgical themes, bought six lots in the evening sale: a large stainless steel cabinet filled with manufactured diamonds, a pair of gold-plated cabinets containing more lab gems, three butterfly canvasses and a spot painting with a gleaming gold background for a total of £11.7m. Other buyers from the region included Maria Baibakova, Vladislav Doronin, Victor Pinchuk and Gary Tatintsian.

There’s just the slightest whiff of a sneer at the arrivistes cloaked in these statistics: “39% of the buyers had never bought contemporary art before and 24% of them were new to Sotheby’s. Europeans (including Russians) bought 74% of the lots, while 17.7% went to the Americas and 8.3% flew to Asia and the Middle East.”

This event-perhaps intentionally-undermined Hirst’s resale market: “The average auction price for a Hirst work in 2008 was $831,000. So far in 2010 it is down to $136,000, a sum that does not even take into account the many lots that failed to find buyers.”

And this for an artist whose work became all about the market. Earlier this year, when Hirst showed at Gagosian on Madison Avenue in New York, Roberta Smith of the Times wrote: “In the beginning he conducted himself with intelligence or at least inclusive cheer. Not so much these days. It is as if Mr. Hirst had seen the light, and it was gold, and he wants to shove it in our faces lest we think we are above greed.”

What’s more, it’s difficult to believe that the Precious revelations wouldn’t have dampened the zillionaire appetite for Hirst’s butterfly paintings as early as September of 2008, but it seems they didn’t. There has been surprisingly little comment on this matter. Because let’s face it, very few people, none of them rich or powerful, would benefit from the truth coming out. And yet! The truth does seem to have a way of floating into view, eventually.

With so much collapsing these days it is impossible to know whether or not Hirst’s resale market bubble has permanently burst. I will wager, though, that it has.

Maria Bustillos is the author of Dorkismo: The Macho of the Dork and

Act Like a Gentleman, Think Like a Woman.

This seems like a BAD IDEA: “[S]cientists have developed robots that are able to deceive humans and even hide from their enemies. An experiment by researchers at the Georgia Institute of Technology is believed to be the first detailed examination of robot deception. The team developed computer algorithms that would let a robot ‘decide’ whether it should deceive a human or another robot and gave it strategies to give it the best chance of not being found out.”

Oh, wait, there’s a positive side to it?

“[R]esearchers say that robots that are capable of deception will be valuable in the future, particularly when used in the military.”

Ah, I feel MUCH BETTER now. It’s only a matter of time before the elite strike force of bullshitting automatons comes to suck all the mercury from our bloodstreams and use our bones for spare parts. I think I’m just gonna wait this one out on the couch playing Wii.

62 Books That Are About The Fight For/The Battle For/The Struggle For Various Things.

by Brady Hammock

Every night millions of us interact with the rich and famous-in our dreams. But why should those celebrity encounters remain off the record? Star columnist Brady Hammock is here to bring you all the dirt about your favorite personalities and how they really act when they think they’re safe behind the scrim of your subconscious.

OPRAH TO DREAMER: WATCH THE CASUAL RAPE JOKES

Perhaps you assume there are some limits to Oprah Winfrey’s knowledge, power, and reach. Well, if our dream-tipster is right-then you’re wrong!

Here’s what happened in our source’s recent dream. “There was a knock on my door,” she confides. “It was Oprah, and behind her were many women who as a group were immediately recognizable as ‘her audience.’”

Can you imagine!? Oprah and “her audience” come a-knocking? Do vampire invite-rules apply? Perhaps so, because according to this tipster, Oprah asked if “they” could enter. “So I let them into the gigantic space that was my apartment in the dream,” Dreamcatcher’s exclusive source continues. “It turned out that Oprah (and Gayle, who was also suddenly there holding Oprah’s hand) was very concerned that I was making casual jokes about rape in everyday cocktail party conversation.”

Well! Dreamcrasher does not intend to get involved in the politics of casual rape jokes! So we pass no judgment on what happened next.

“I promised that I would try to stop,” our source relates. “But I was lying. I had no intention of stopping. I just wanted Oprah to leave, because I was sleepy.”

‘TRUE BLOOD’ HUNK “BORED” WITH SHOW!

Alexander SkarsgÃ¥rd, best known as fang-bangable Eric Northman on HBO’s bizarrely successful vampire vehicle “True Blood,” confessed in a recent dream that he is “kinda bored” with the show.

According to a probably reliable tipster, the cartoonishly hunky Swede blithely confessed his coolness toward one of our impoverished pop culture’s apparent bright spots in a dream that involved cruising in a convertible on an improbably deserted Los Angeles freeway.

“He didn’t really elaborate,” says this source of the man who starred in his dream. “I just brought up the show and how I like it, and he said he was kinda bored with it. He looked really sensational; it was a perfect day. I remember that.” Annoyingly, this dreamer offers no further details of SkarsgÃ¥rd’s take on Alan Ball, Anna Paquin, or anything else that we can sink our teeth into, pleading imperfect memories.

“Don’t make me sound gay,” he adds.

EMERIL, STILL BAM-ING THROUGH DREAMLAND-WITH HIS INCREDIBLY DISTURBING LIMBLESS AND TORSO-LESS TWIN!!

Emeril Lagasse, though largely forgotten by the entertainment establishment and Americans in general, evidently continues to thrive in the dream-states of our readers.

“This time,” says a trustworthy source describing activities that unfolded before her eyes in a recent dream, “he was performing a standing-room-only concert.” Performing? You mean cooking live onstage? No, faithful readers: In this dream, Emeril was singing country music!

But that’s not the weird thing. “The weird thing,” our tipster claims, “was that he was performing a close-harmony duet with his twin.” Well that is weird. Emeril has a twin? Well whatever, because that’s actually, really, seriously, very much, NOT the weird part.

The weird part is that the twin “had lost all his limbs and his torso in the war.”

That’s right, faithful readers: Emeril’s heretofore unknown twin, without limbs or torso, joined his famous brother and belt out a country duet. How did he overcome what our source politely calls “his disabilities”?

Like this: “ His head was attached to a bipedal robotic platform.”

Ah.

Have you slumbered around with a star? What popular singer surprised you in your dream by becoming your high school algebra teacher? Brady Hammock wants to share your story with the world. Tattle your tale-or as much of it as you can remember-here. Confidentiality GUARANTEED! Pleasant dreams!

Oh, why not, it’s Friday. Anyone know how to say “diva” in Klingon? Actually, don’t tell me, I don’t care. Enjoy.

According to their press release, Jon Hamm is on the cover of the October Details: “After years of struggling, Jon Hamm finally arrived with Mad Men, creating a style icon who’s come to help us rediscover our lost masculine cool. He is…THE LAST ALPHA MALE.” Haha, okay! The last, you say! Bonus fun profile sentence: “Hamm’s high-school girlfriend’s older brother’s college roommate was an eager actor named Paul Rudd.” And a spoiler alert: worst so-obviously editor-inserted last sentence of a magazine profile ever. Should have been headlined Jon Hamm Has A Sad.

“I really have no idea how different this book would have been with an all-female writing crew. I would imagine the drawing of a vagina might have been more accurate, though, and might not have included so many rows of fangs.”
Man explains what went wrong with humor book about sex (“Our Bodies, Our Junk”) that was written by five men. (Don’t worry boys-the successful ladies are too busy getting divorced to be funny.)