Everyone’s going to say the same thing, you’re going to hear it all day, sorry to be so boring. Oh, do please go vote.

Now, if you are Canadian, or a felon, or both, which is pretty likely with YOU PEOPLE, I am very sorry. How annoying, I am sure. Or perhaps you messed up your voter registration and you are cowering in shame in your hovel. That is legitimate.

As for the rest of you… do you know how to vote? It’s not hard. Here’s a handy step-by-step guide.

But I would very much like you to vote. I have heard the arguments about being “implicated” in a “system of compromise” and therefore “not wanting to vote.” To you, I say: EAT DICKS IN SPACE.

I mean honestly, don’t go to the supermarket then if you can’t deal with being implicated. An abusive system that keeps poor people poor brought that food to your table, oh no, better stop eating. YOU ARE implicated.

Not voting is fine, in a system in which every candidate is absolutely identical. But really, they never are. It’s just that the big two candidates are very, very similar.

But do you not remember the last New York City mayoral election? When Bloomberg kept putting it out that his third term was in the bag? Guess what! IT WASN’T. But no one really went to vote, and he squeaked by on your apathy.

And sure. Voting is a funny combination of hard and easy. Like most of you probably, I have an argument with myself every election about “voting my conscience” versus “voting practically.” This year, NOT THAT YOU ASKED, I was pretty seriously bent on voting my conscience. That would mean voting for neither the Republican or the Democratic candidate. This is the “but they’re both pigs” theory, which is legit. And you are totally welcome to vote for Roseanne or whomever you like. I mean I was pretty close.

But over the last month… Paul Ryan made me vote for Barack Obama, as a clear way to say “I am among the people who am horrified by Paul Ryan, and I will use my vote in a way that is perhaps distasteful to me against Paul Ryan.”

Dick Cheney was a monster who should never have been allowed to live in the Naval Observatory. And while Paul Ryan’s not the terrifying, crushing, battering ram of a capitalist brute that Cheney was, I actually think that Paul Ryan is more deadly. He embodies the Republican plank, and if you have not read that plank, you should do so. It is pretty harrowing.

Mitt Romney — eh, poor Mitt is just a guy who doesn’t understand why he’s not more popular, because everyone’s always liked him, and he doesn’t understand why he can’t explain that he believes whatever it is that we all want him to believe at any given moment. But Paul Ryan is a true believer. Paul Ryan wants to amend the holy crap out of the Constitution. And even though he’s also a pig at the trough like Cheney, unlike Cheney he fervently wants to create a Christian nation out of the United States. No thanks.

Paul Ryan is literally out campaigning on his belief that “traditional marriage” is an “American value.” He is out campaigning on the idea that “unelected judges” shouldn’t decide what the Constitution says. He believes “our faith informs us in everything we do.” The word “our” in that is not acceptable. He believes a fetus is a person. He is also only 42, and we have to start dealing with him now.

In any event: you were warned. Do what you want with that.

“A new study discovers young women’s body perceptions are influenced by how they believe their friends — or peers — judge their body.”

A very happy 80th to honky tonk hero Stonewall Jackson, born Mordecai Isidore Hymowitz. (J/K, his birth name really is Stonewall Jackson.) My favorite will always be this song here, but let’s have a couple more just to celebrate.

“New research shows ginger moggies are cat owners’ favourites, because they are perceived as friendly and lovable. In contrast, white cats are seen as aloof and distant, tabby cats as intolerant and black cats — as befits their depiction in folklore — as unlucky and mysterious.”

We were worried about Chan Marshall but apparently for the wrong medical reasons.

“Note well, Democrats: If Mr. Obama wins, Hillary Clinton will never become president.”
 — Note it well, Democrats. NOTE IT WELL.

Obama And Romney’s Flickr-War For Your Love (And Vote)

by Ana Marie Cox And Jason Linkins

With the election tomorrow, the Annotated White House Flickr Feed takes one last fond look at the campaign photos streaming out from Election 2012. Here to make sense of the images are The Guardian’s Ana Marie Cox and Huffington Post political reporter Jason Linkins. This week’s important discoveries: The Romney team’s love affair with Instagram is flourishing; Paul Ryan may have a good reason for always wearing that windbreaker; if Barack’s going out, he’s going out his way; and meet Joe Biden, HUG MACHINE.

ANA MARIE: This looks really apocalyptic to me, for some reason.

JASON: Ahh, yes, Red Rocks, where the white people would more typically be found seeing Dave Matthews.

ANA MARIE: They did some serious Hipstamaticking or Instawhatevering to these. YET THEY ARE STILL OUT OF FOCUS.

JASON: Definitely point the camera right into the light source. I tell you what, the Romney campaign is a fundamental rejection of the Pete Souza administration.

ANA MARIE Grainy, fake-old and out of focus. There are so many metaphors for the Romney campaign available here.

ANA MARIE: And then, after some attempts to make pictures that don’t hurt the eyes, we’re back to the patented Romney Crowd Shots, otherwise known as Visual Ambien.

JASON: The Red Rocks shot was at least impressive. Huge crowd, verging on, you know… DECEMBERISTS level. Now we just have the backs of people’s heads in a gym. And who is that talking? That might just be one of the people in the crowd, commandeering the stage to make sure the pizza order is correct.

ANA MARIE: I bet the favorite pizza of a Romney crowd is cheese.

ANA MARIE: Look, more back-of-peoples-heads. It’s harder to tell exactly how white they are from the back, I guess?

JASON: “Pennsylvanians stand in front of random wall.”

JASON: There’s a lot of code-switching going on in that picture.

ANA MARIE: I dunno, I thought Village of the Damned, kinda.

JASON: I actually wonder if that is a shot of some dad, showing off his son’s “Romney supporter” costume. “Isn’t this hilarious! He’s like a post-modern Alex P. Keaton! (Drink your lattes, kids, before they get cold.)”

ANA MARIE: I think they’re probably homeschooled and they don’t realize that somewhere there’s a whole high-school dance filled with girls going as “sexy unicorns” or something.

ANA MARIE: I can’t believe how many shots of the backs of people’s heads there are in the world.

JASON: It’s too bad that the Romney photographer isn’t taking advantage of the “backs of people’s heads” tag, because who knows how many voters they’d reach.

JASON: This is another one of those shots that looks like a weird photocollage. Why is EVERYTHING IN THE SHOT POPPING?

ANA MARIE: Over-saturated and undecipherable. I’m voting for the blur!

JASON: I really like what the guy standing dead center on the stage whose head looks like it is about to go supernova is saying about a “real recovery.”

ANA MARIE: I would like to point out that it wouldn’t be in the Romney Flickr stream if it didn’t also contain a healthy representation of the backs of people’s heads.

JASON: No, that is… unavoidable at this point.

ANA MARIE: And, oh God, I’m sorry, but honestly I saw this and the first thing I thought was “trucknutz.”

JASON: NEVER BE SORRY ABOUT THE TRUCKNUTZ.

ANA MARIE: OH, AND BACKS OF HEADS! HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN WHEN YOU’RE TAKING A PICTURE *FROM THE STAGE*??? I mean, it’s not just the Secret Service people. I guess maybe Romney’s Making an Entrance.

JASON: These past two pictures, I do not even know what time of day the shots were taken. The daylight shot looks drenched in flash, somehow. This shot, I can’t tell if it’s day or night. This is like a guy who wants to do ALL THE STUFF in Instagram. They have a light flare, a filter, a tilt shift aimed at nothing in particular…

ANA MARIE: ALL THE FILTERS, all of them. But there is no filter for Souza.

JASON: “This photo was taken on October 12, 2012 in Whites, Lancaster, OH, US.” Now THAT I believe.

ANA MARIE: Seriously, now. How long can we go on, cataloging the fact that the Romney Flickr stream is just PACKED with pictures of the backs of people’s heads?

JASON: Well, at least in this one, they have a big building to randomly shoot. But again, what it the POINT OF THIS PHOTO? Some people talked, and there were other people — here they are from the neck up. And wow, look at this building! It’s neat to see buildings! Meanwhile the only way I can tell that is Romney talking is because I know that’s Paul Ryan standing next to him, and I know that’s Paul Ryan because he is wearing the ONE GODDAMNED WINDBREAKER HE OWNS, and now, I guess I know why he wears that — so people recognize him in these photographs!

JASON: So, here’s one possibility, folks. America’s comeback team. Romney looking one way, Ryan looking the other. Still don’t know, actually, if they see eye to eye on everything.

ANA MARIE: The world’s unhappiest conjoined twins.

JASON: Hey, Paul, if you lose, you get to go back to being yourself again… so upside!

ANA MARIE: Paul, in his head: “Can finally take off this fucking windbreaker and get back to work on my abs.” Okay, on to the Organizing For America Feed!

ANA MARIE: And with the first one we are confronted with the sad reality that OFA chose to use some of its precious campaign funds to hire a professional photographer. I mean, i don’t know who else looks at these things with the level of scrutiny that we do, but I am flattered that OFA thought of my needs. Maybe Ohio has more amateur photographers than you’d think?

JASON: Yeah, okay. Devil’s advocate. Maybe all the terrible Romney campaign photos that look like they were taken by UFO cranks represents a very thrifty, cost-effective approach.

ANA MARIE: I mean, yes, the LIGHTS IN THE SKY! aesthetic sort of fits in with the Romney campaign as a whole as well.

JASON: I think if Joe Biden hadn’t gotten into politics, he would have been an awesome UFO chaser.

ANA MARIE: And could have taken photos for the Romney campaign. JOB CREATED.

JASON: That is what is happening right now in the “Fringe” universe.

ANA MARIE: And okay, let’s accept that the OFA stream has photos that include the backs of people’s heads too. But I would also point out that the guy on the stage is in focus, and is also one of the men running for national office.

JASON: Yes, this is shooting backs of heads correctly. My eyes are not drawn to the bald spots of white dudes. (Which is all the better for Joe Biden, when you think about it.)

ANA MARIE: Have we spent enough time with Biden, doing these? I don’t think so. He is the most emotional politician this side of Chris Christie. He’s the guy with the “free hugs” sign, always, in his eyes.

JASON: Yeah. I think that there are only a few politicians that genuinely like campaigning this long, and still go out looking forward to doing more. Biden is one, and Clinton is another.

ANA MARIE: And Biden is just ferociously un-self-aware. YOU, HEY OUT THE WINDOW, YOU! AND YOU!

ANA MARIE: AND YOU THERE! YOU! HUGS! EVERYONE GETS A HUG!

JASON: Biden realizes that the campaign trail is the parallel universe where people are dying to meet him.

ANA MARIE: See, I think he thinks that all the time. I think he sits in the old executive office building all day, hitting refresh on Facebook, “poking” people. And GIDDY about it! (No one tells him he’s not actually connected to the internet.)

ANA MARIE: Back at Wonkette, we relied on baby-eating jokes for pictures like this but I’m worried what Fox might do with that.

JASON: “Obama indoctrinates another young patriot! (P.S. BUY GOLD, and also CATHETERS.)” would be my guess.

ANA MARIE: WTF all the catheter commercials on Fox, right? What they need is GOLD CATHETERS.

JASON: You notice how this picture is not the over-saturated, tilt-shifted, can’t tell what time of day or what planet it is type of nonsense we saw from the Romney feed?

ANA MARIE: NO LIGHTS IN THE SKY

JASON: We made so much fun of Souza. My God, we were foolish fools.

JASON: Okay… what is this though?

ANA MARIE: JOE BIDEN IS YOUR GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH.

JASON: Another indie rock album cover… but whose?

ANA MARIE: Oh, I’m thinking Ted Leo, but black and white.

JASON: Oh, that’s great! I can’t wait to tell him!

ANA MARIE: He is on Twitter. And I think reads The Awl. HI, TED!

JASON: We love you, Ted!

ANA MARIE: Here is Obama being someone who does not talk about trees being the right height.

JASON: Here is Obama being someone who thinks he’ll be sticking around. If he’s going out, he’s going out as optimistically as he can.

ANA MARIE: Trying to avoid something about swagge… but hey, swagger. I have almost forgotten about the mom pants. This is the guy Jay-Z wants to get a call from.

JASON: Yep. Of course, this is also the guy David Brooks wants to get a call from. (But don’t do it, Barry!)

ANA MARIE: Adorable glasses. I hope she runs for president someday.

JASON: You know, I don’t know if Obama is going to win or lose. But if that kid becomes President, she’ll never have to go through all the shit Obama went through. Between birther nonsense and nose-bones and John Sununu and the fact that he’s GOT TO BE the one guy in the world who can cap Osama bin Laden’s ass and have the more martial faction of the nation totally dismiss it as a hot load of nothing, and still say shit like he “sympathizes with the attackers in Benghazi.” Obama took a lot of shots, so that the Presidents of the future — if we get to have a future — won’t have to.

ANA MARIE: Well, you totally just undermined my Urkel joke. Thanks.

Previously: Obama And Romney Turn To Instagram In Battle of White House Photo Worthiness

★★★★ Fine-looking, what there was of it. The early arrival of a bright morning did not make up for how quickly the brightness would pass. When did the clock change stop being a gift of rest and become a case of sedentary jet lag? (A: Fall of 1989.) Already, at what was nominally the back end of midday, the sun was lowering in earnest. Downtown-facing pedestrians stomped right into it, hurrying through the cold in blind straight lines, unable to account for the backlit figures coming the other way — who in turn could not quite grasp that these fully illuminated figures could be so unseeing. Vectors of resentment glanced off each other. A newly bought mitten was lost for half an hour, then recovered from the threshold of the elevator lobby. A tiny dog with thin, pale fur stood hunched and trembling at the end of its leash, despite its polyester-fleece dog vest.

by Evan Hughes

You have until midnight tonight to get in your bets for The Awl 2012 Electoral College Pool. WHO WILL WIN? Maybe Mitt Romney. Maybe you! Maybe both you and Mitt Romney.

In the name of accountability, here’s your one-stop shop for taunting the punditocracy after the election. Here are assertions from notable pundits about who will win the actual electoral college betting pool.

Romney Wins

Walter Kirn, political correspondent for the New Republic, believes from his time on the road that the polls and the analysts are going down.

Being out there and chatting and seeingtells me this election will be the pollsters and quants HMS Titanic moment.

— walter kirn (@walterkirn) November 3, 2012

Dick Morris: On The Hill, Oct. 30: “Opinion: Here comes the landslide.” And on dickmorris.com, Nov. 2: “There are many reasons that Obama will lose — by a lot — on Tuesday.” Specifically, he’s going 325 for Romney — which includes Minnesota.

Karl Rove, Wall Street Journal, Oct. 31: “Mitt Romney will be declared America’s 45th president. Let’s call it 51%-48%, with Mr. Romney carrying at least 279 Electoral College votes, probably more.”

Larry O’Connor, Editor-in-Chief at Breitbart.TV, is going Romney 295, Obama 243.

Here is my Electoral College prediction as heard just now on @wmalmornings w/@brianwilsondc ->bit.ly/TFhsar

— Larry O’Connor (@LarryOConnor) November 5, 2012

Michael Barone of the Washington Examiner: “Going out on a limb: Romney beats Obama, handily,” Nov. 2: “Bottom line: Romney 315, Obama 223.” Barone specifically predicts that Romney will win Pennsylvania and Wisconsin.

Alex Castellanos predicts Romney. “My experience is that the Beatles were right: Money can’t buy you love, or turnout.”

George Will: On “This Week with George Stephanopoulos,” Nov. 4. Romney in a landslide, 321–217. “I guess the wild card in what I’ve projected is that I’m projecting Minnesota to go for Romney.” Will also predicts that evangelicals who turn out in order to vote to ban same-sex marriage in Minnesota will tip the scales there toward Romney, despite that it is the only state to have voted for the Democrat in nine straight presidential elections.

Kathryn Lopez of the National Review also agrees with Will on this one, and that Romney will win because of the “marriage vote.”

i think George Will is right. Romney will take Minnesota, and on account of the marriage vote.

— Kathryn Jean Lopez (@kathrynlopez) November 4, 2012

Kevin Eder, of the Media Research Center, is going Romney 281, Obama 257.

I’ve been asked several times 2day what my Electoral College prediction is. As I see it right now, it looks like this bit.ly/VMFYUD

— Kevin Eder (@keder) November 5, 2012

Ellen Carmichael, former Herman Cain spokesperson, says Romney and Scott Brown will win, “rooted in facts.”

My prediction for tomorrow: Romney wins, Scott Brown holds onto seat. Not just optimism. Rooted in facts (too many for a single tweet).

— Ellen Carmichael (@ellencarmichael) November 5, 2012

A notable Congresswoman from Minnesota is excited.

George Will says #MNRed is a reality on #thisweek! Keep watching @kstp in Minnesota for my debate at 10:00 am CST today. #MN06Debate

— Michele Bachmann (@TeamBachmann) November 4, 2012

Charles Krauthammer, on Fox News, Nov. 3:

SEAN HANNITY: Charles Krauthammer, your best prediction.
CHARLES KRAUTHAMMER: Romney. Very close, but he’ll win the popular by I think about half a point, electoral college probably, uh, a very narrow margin.

Jay Cost, Weekly Standard, “Morning Jay: Why Romney Is Likely to Win,” Nov. 2: “I am not willing to take polls at face value anymore. I am more interested in connecting the polls to history and the long-run structure of American politics, and when I do that I see a Romney victory.”

Newt Gingrich, on Fox News, Oct. 25: “I believe the minimum result will be 53–47 Romney, over 300 electoral votes, and the Republicans will pick up the Senate.”

William Kristol, “Marvelous Mitt,” Weekly Standard, Oct. 26: “As president, Mitt Romney will have the extraordinary opportunity to rescue America from the spirits of the shady night of a decadent liberalism, and lead the nation onto the broad sunlit uplands of solvency, prosperity, and, yes, greatness.”

Ari Fleischer, former White House press secretary under George W. Bush and CNN analyst, comes in with minimum 271 for Romney.

My prediction: Romn 50.1%-49.5%. Romn w minimum 271 EVs (FL, VA, CO, WI, NH). 309 EVs if he takes OH&PA. Pres-elect Romney

— Ari Fleischer (@AriFleischer) November 5, 2012

Finally, for comparison, Mitt Romney’s political director Rich Beeson predicted they’d get “more than 300 electoral college votes.”

Obama Wins

Jim Cramer of CNBC’s “Mad Money,” in the Washington Post, Nov. 3, predicts that Obama will win 440 electoral votes to Romney’s 98. “The presidential race is nowhere as close as the polls suggest.”

@fivethirtyeight So … you’re saying there’s a chance!

— Matt O’Brien (@ObsoleteDogma) November 5, 2012

Charles Gibson, former ABC World News anchor, speech at Quinnipiac University, Sep. 20: “But folks, Barack Obama’s gonna win.”

David Gergen, speech in Walnut Creek, CA, Oct. 24: “[Gergen] predicted Obama will win, boldly asserting the split would be 53 (Obama) to 47 (Romney).”

Here’s Jamelle Bouie, in the American Prospect: “An Obama win in New Hampshire, Virginia, Iowa, Wisconsin, Ohio, Colorado, and Nevada, with Romney wins in North Carolina and Florida. That means the president claims 303 electoral votes to Romney’s 235, and he ekes out a popular-vote victory of 50.4 percent to Romney’s 48.2.”

Former governor and current War Room-er Jennifer Granholm:

My prediction: POTUS wins 303 electoral votes! Incl. VA, CO, NH, OH, WI, IA, NV.The swing states he cld lose: FL and NC. Even then …

— Jennifer Granholm (@JenGranholm) November 5, 2012

Chris Cillizza of the Washington Post, Nov. 3. Obama will win narrowly, Cillizza says, collecting 277 electoral votes.

Melissa Harris-Perry of MSNBC, Christina Bellantoni of PBS NewsHour, and Juan Williams of Fox News (yes, the one who got fired from NPR) all independently predicted, on Nov. 3 in the Washington Post, that Obama will win by a score of 290–248. My hunch is that they are matching Nate Silver’s call on 49 states, but awarding Virginia to Romney rather than Obama. That’s precisely the map that Larry Sabato of the University of Virginia Center for Politics projected today. Another possibility is that they are matching Silver’s map in 48 states, but flipping Colorado and New Hampshire to Romney.

Matthew Dowd, on “This Week with George Stephanopoulos,” Nov. 4.

Just predicted on this week that Obama wins electoral college with 303 votes. Very very tight in national popular vote. Tiny edge to Obama.

— Matthew Dowd (@matthewjdowd) November 4, 2012

Talking head Paul Begala:

Okay,@cnnopinion, here’s my final prediction: POTUS wins 297 electoral votes; Romney 241. #electionwin

— Paul Begala (@PaulBegala) November 5, 2012

Allan Lichtman, author of Keys to the White House, predicts an Obama victory. He has correctly picked the winner of the popular vote in every presidential election since he began using his “13 keys” system in the 1984 race. But note that he gets an asterisk for 2000, when Al Gore, his selection, won the popular vote but lost the election.

Brit Hume, on Fox News, Nov. 4. Hume did not unambiguously make a prediction, but he said: “And we’re about to find out whether these state-level sentiments [favoring Obama] that are measured with relatively small samples of voters turn out to be correct. I think it’s unlikely — it’s hard to imagine as a political journalist that these many polls are off.”

Finally, for comparison, Joe Biden didn’t put numbers to it, but declared they’d handily win and take “Ohio, Wisconsin, Iowa and New Hampshire,” with an “even chance in Virginia and Florida.”

My own prediction, since we’re here, is that Obama will win with 323 electoral votes. Where I differ from the 538 model is that I think Romney will take Colorado, but that Obama, as I said last week, will pull off an upset worth 29 electoral votes.

As long as we’re defying Nate Silver’s math and going with our gut, I think Obama takes Florida.

— Evan Hughes (@evanhughes) October 31, 2012

If you want to get in the game, because clearly anyone can play, join The Awl Electoral College Pool.

Evan Hughes is the author of Literary Brooklyn. He’s on Twitter, making with the predictions.

PATH remains suspended due to damage to signal, control and substation equipment in multiple stations.

— PATH Rail System (@PATHTweet) November 5, 2012

Hello, welcome to another edition of The Awl’s Business Travel Answer Bag, where we bring you business travel weather on the fives. Today’s question is from a gentleman arriving in New York tomorrow via Newark Airport. He asks, “Uhh, where exactly am I supposed to stand, at 6 p.m. tomorrow, and what am I supposed to have, as far as exact change or school vouchers or tickets, in order to board some kind of public transportation or emergency shuttle or maybe one of those crew rowing boats, so I can go to Manhattan and then Brooklyn? Also will it be super cold or what, what’s even happening over there? Is it like that Art Bell movie?”

Good question! One thing we can safely predict is that an “alien invasion” probably won’t be that bad, compared to all this other stuff, and also because everyone is well prepared for a space-monster attack on New York because of all the Hollywood blockbusters that routinely conclude with the destruction of Manhattan by mile-wide UFOs. As far as your Newark problem, it is true that the PATH trains remain out of service. PATH is a wonderful system used by more than a quarter-million commuters each weekday … when the system isn’t destroyed by Frankenstorms or terrorism or god knows what next! We have been following the PATH Twitter to see what’s going on and, well, it doesn’t look too good for the short term. Do you have a friend with a car in Elizabeth or Union who might give you a ride to Manhattan? Traffic would be going “the other way” at that point, so you could maybe take him to one of those giant sports bars around Times Square, kill an hour or three eating fried things in a basket while sporting events appear on many flat screens, and then he could drive home.

You can try tweeting to PATH to see if you get a different result, but it seems like the only thing PATH will tweet is this same message, again and again: “PATH remains suspended due to damage to signal, control and substation equipment in multiple stations.”

At least there’s a clue buried in all that Debbie Downer talk: The ferry might be running, one of them anyway, so go look at the ferry Twitter or New Jersey Transit if it’s so important!

New Jersey Transit has a very accommodating and helpful Twitter Robot. Ask a certain thing, and you get an answer!

@nj_transit Hello! What’s best for Newark Airport to … anywhere in Manhattan, NYPenn or otherwise, tomorrow afternoon? Thanks!

— Ken Layne (@KenLayne) November 5, 2012

So let’s just wait here for a few minutes, see what happens. An answer should be coming soon. Here we go, thanks!

@kenlayne we have rail service operating btwn #EWR & NY Penn you can find the modified schedule here njtransit.com/pdf/NEC_WITH_N…

— New Jersey Transit (@NJ_TRANSIT) November 5, 2012

That’s it for today’s “Ask The Awl Answer Bag For Business Travelers,” join us again on the quarter hour for the latest updates.