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60. Edward Head
59. Eric Plunk
58. Elmer Klumpp
57. Jayson Faatz
56. Gene Klutts
55. Raymond Ripplemeyer
54. John Boozer
53. Mickey Mantle
52. Pedro Borbón
51. Branch Rickey
50. William Pennyfeather
49. Chester Poindexter
48. Percival Rising
47. Gaylord Perry
46. Gradius Sizemore
45. Cletus Poffenberger
44. Heathcliff Slocumb
43. Ledell Titcomb
42. Timothy Spooneybarger
41. Trevore Plouffe
40. Quinton McCracken
39. Van Lingle Mungo
38. Thurman Munson
37. Harvey Shank
36. Everitt Booe
35. Nicholas Swisher
34. Darryl Strawberry
33. Marvin Throneberry
32. Milton Bradley
31. Lance Broadway
30. Melvin Queen
29. Clarence Pickup
28. Daniel Pfister
27. George Pfister
26. Robert Walk
25. Charles Suck
24. Benjamin Bowcock
23. John Glasscock
22. George Bone
21. Henry Boney
20. Bill Bonness
19. Richard Pole
18. Joseph Putz
17. Harry Pyle
16. Lee Pitlock
15. Merkin Valdez
14. Elroy Face
13. Guy Bush
12. John Coutlangus
11. Orel Hershiser
10. Paul Assenmacher
9. Josh Booty
8. Ebenezer Beatin
7. John Dickshot
6. Fernandas Eunick
5. Roland Fingers
4. John Gooch
3. Urban Shocker
2. Eldon Repulski
1. Orville Veal

Joe MacLeod, aka Mr. Wrong, can converse with you via many medias.

Are you having a good Summer? I hope you are, and not just because I am enjoying having an awesome Summer, seriously, and the best part is it ain’t over yet! Arrooo! Yeah, man, it is, like, only August 11 right now, and I am in my castle wearing a bathing suit and as soon as I finish writering-up this Column I’m going upstairs to my Refrigerator to tap out another serving of my New Best Friend, Franzia Chillable Red, yow! It’s like Wine, except it is sweet enough to drink a lot of, you know? Plus it comes in a Carbon Box! Ecology! Bottles are not cool if you are fixing to be poolside, which is why I’m wearing my bathing suit, man, because it is Summer! Yeah! Really man, no glass around the pool, this is not the first time I have mentioned this, OK? READ MORE

It ain’t the heat, it’s the hotness of the humid. READ MORE

I think the Mainstream Media, whatever that is, has been doing a very good job reporting on the New York 9th District Congressman Anthony Weiner and his naughties. I’m kinda sick of hearing about it, but that’s my fault, because I consume lots of super-obvious Lowest Common Denominator News and Infotainments, where I have heard a kabillion-jillion things about Anthony Weiner from my teevee in the morning when I put the stupid TODAY show on and then in the bathroom, where I perform my morning ablutions in the manner of Pontius Pilate (one of History’s notable Public Servants), and I hear more about Anthony Weiner on the news programs on my radio. One of the programs I listen to while I am cleaning my teeth is a middle-of-the-road Traffic-and-Weather-Together kinda show and the other one is an hilarious Right-Wing syndicated thing that runs on a local Sports Radio channel, and they throw down on that show, man, when they talk about stuff like Mr. Weiner’s been doing, they call it “Perverted,” which I find it to be Highly Entertaining, when people get Judgmental about stuff, so I am hooked on that radio program, for reals, and I believe I am similar to zillions of people then, out here in the streets of Lowest Common Denominator, where I get my Info Feed, and where the info almost immediately gets processed by the American Jokes Industry and Entertainment Tonight and stuff. READ MORE

So now they (and you know who They are) went and changed the food triangle-pyramid to a circle, with this Choose My Plate to remind you that you are fat. Yeah, it’s totally subliminal except I figured it out almost immediately with my subconscious mind because I remember all that stuff about Egypt and The Pyramids, and how they are a source of Great Power and cool-ass READ MORE

It is around this time of year that I am pleased to remind The Public that I am available for speaking engagements at all manner of Commencement Ceremonies, be they for fancy-pants four-year Universities of Higher Learning or Two-Year Junior Colleges, like the one I went to. Also, Trade schools, GED programs, you name it, Hamburger f'ing University, man, if you’re looking for someone to address The Graduate and give them some sorta clue as to What’s Next, I am ready to travel to Your Town, USA, for a modest honorarium and confirmed accommodations at the nearest Best Western or full-on Holiday Inn, and not one of those Holiday Inn “express” joints, OK? READ MORE

I eat a lot of Questionable Things, with gravy on ’em and stuff, so I thought I maybe should find some ways to improve my diet, and to that end, I have been eating a lot of those “Energy Bar” CLIF® bar things lately, in order to be Healthy, you know? I mean, it’s like this, I thought instead of a greasy baconeggandcheese every morning from the place on the corner, I would instead enjoy CLIF® bar at my desk (along with two giant glasses of water, which is also Healthy, but mostly because otherwise a goddamn CLIF® bar will choke you out because they are so compacted with Energy or Nutrients or whatever), so I went to the “Price Club,” which is always on a road called “Price Club Drive” or else it is a numbered road, like “Route 582” and you are right, going to a “Price Club” sounds like a Bad Idea in terms of cultivating Sensible Eating habits, because, stereotypically, a lot of the customers at these “Price Club” places are Obese, and also you walk around and there are all these “free samples” stands all over the place with hair-net ladies in aprons working electric skillets and frying stuff and announcing what they are handing out, and hey, it’s Free Samples, so you start walking faster toward one with your oversized shopping cart and then you just get your nose open and you are a sightless animal wheeling around the aisles, reacting only to scent and sound of stuff frying, headed toward “Hello, try some Chicken Quesadilla” and “Hey Turkey Pot Roast,” which you think might be good for you almost, or at least way-less bad than regular cancer-meat pot roast since it’s made out of Turkey? But don’t fall for it. READ MORE

It is The Holidays! Right now, right this very NOW it is the Holiday Season! Even if you are grumpy about This Time of Year, I am going to wish you a Good Grumples, because if it is satisfying for you to be that way, then Be All You Can Be, OK? READ MORE

My mom was a single mom, raising my brother and me with no help. She worked as an Art Director at department stores back when there were lots of ‘em, with in-house Art Departments, and then later she worked at Advertising Agencies. It was a lot like "Mad Men" still, in the Nineteen Hundred and Seventies, except there was no justice like on "Mad Men," where the ladies win one every once in a while. My mom worked early, late and weekends. READ MORE