I met Bill Nye, the global warming guy.

Herman Cain went from "That guy who debated Clinton?" to candidate for the Republican nomination for president of the United States of America to frontrunner in that race to the "Cain Train!" to walking embarrassing quote machine to "Sexual Harassment Train" to "Whatever happened to that guy who debated Clinton and then ran for president?" That took place in about nine months.

But all was not lost. Along the way, Herman met a great gang of people. And as they say, what's important is the journey, not the destination. Let's look back on a scrapbook of Herman Cain's two [...]

It's astounding that this is lingering as a news cycle as long as it has already, but can we all just agree to now ignore Herman Cain? Every election cycle some alleged front-runner dominates the news—welcomed by the candidates who'll be the real front-runners once there's actually primaries and stuff. Then this person gets pilloried and there's a "miraculous fall" or explosion or petering-out or whatever, and then we can get down to the real business. The point being that no one can stay front and in the center in the news that long without burning America's attention span right out. And the news cycle sure doesn't care who's getting [...]

The attacks were "a despicable act directed at everyone in Norway," said Siv Jensen, the leader of the Norwegian Progress Party. While her assessment of the 76 dead and nearly 100 injured may be philosophically true, it's technically false. The bombing and mass shooting late last week was in fact directed at a very specific group of Norwegians. These "summer camp" teens weren't shot for taking canoe lessons; they were shot for being political activists, or children of such. (This was something made very clear by Tea Party leader Glenn Beck, when he functionally ended his corporate career days later by comparing the dead to Hitler Youth).

After years [...]

There are many reasons why I shouldn't have the information I have about Papa John Schnatter, and only one reason that I do. The reasons why not are plentiful. I am not, for instance, a fan of his pizza, and have been critical of it in the past—I have said, on the record and in many instances to people who didn't even ask what I thought of Papa John's, that I think Papa John's pizza "tastes like being in an airport feels" and "is basically an industrial accident covered with seven pounds of shredded cheese."

These critiques, I am aware, are not necessarily unique. What put me on Schnatter's [...]

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Verizon and AT&T should be paying us for helping them with their lab experiment.Sun Apr 17 03:32:27 via webChanRobtChanRobt

Everyone remembers their first. The slow burning excitement. Wondering with anticipation if your advances will be followed. The anxiety about whether you’ve chosen the right person. We refer to the first person you decide to follow on Twitter.

The first follow is a tiny window into a personality. Comedian Tracy Morgan’s first follow, for instance, was his personal assistant Kenny Pierce—a fitting choice for a man who needs supervision.

Gwyneth [...]

“I’m telling you the law. It’s illegal to sell a living armadillo. By statute. Dead armadillos you can sell parts of them. Make a curio of a little armadillo on his back drinking a bottle of beer.” —Scott Vaca, in Gail Collins' op-ed in today's Times, which is actually about Herman Cain and how Collins will not be writing about him anymore. Did you know that a male armadillo's penis is two-thirds the length of its entire body? I did not.

If you missed the extraordinary campaign ad for Republican presidential frontrunner Herman Cain because you've been too busy with other things, please enjoy this modified version of the spot, which contains only the best parts of the original work. It is truly a remarkable age, and astounding country, in which we live.