Posts Tagged: Bill Clinton

How Jeb Bush Loses On Super Tuesday, 2016

Here's one easy way the Republican primaries could go.

Let's say you've got your saggy Scott Brown, your Rand Paul, maybe your Ted Cruz on the outside… and then up front, your Marco Rubio and your Jeb Bush. I just can't take Mike Huckabee seriously, even though he's polling first right now. (In this hypothetical universe, it's, predictably, all men: Everyone decides Nikki Haley is too young, Mary Fallin never gets any steam, and Sarah Palin sticks her head out and everyone's checkbooks retreat in terror and she goes away again.)

How LOL is this?

Jeb is the money leader early out, just because a Bush raises [...]


Man Expounds

Bill Clinton: your feelings? And don't pretend you don't have any.


Bill Clinton Will Always Seem Younger Than 65

William Jefferson Clinton, a man who left office under a cloud of scandal and with the derision of those on the left of his party who thought that he was too politically expedient and quick to compromise on sacred Democratic ideals but who now invoke his name as the kind of tough negotiator who would totally stand up to the opposition and protect our cherished social safety net, turns 65 today. I would say that 15 years from now those people will have the same false nostalgia for Barack Obama, but 15 years from now we will all be living in holes and running from fires and begging the [...]


Weird Omissions: Yes, Goldman Sachs is Now Bill Clinton's Landlord

Here, let us fix this strange omission from this news brief for you, New York Times! "The William J. Clinton Foundation is moving most of its offices from Harlem to 77 Water Street in the financial district, in Lower Manhattan" … where, the paper might mention, Clinton will be subleasing from Goldman Sachs until 2013, at which point the lease is with the owners. (Space which has been vacant for, what, eight years? And had been gut-renovated by Goldman and then never used.) Just so we're clear!


Bill Clinton Says You (And His Staff) Are All Liars

"I didn't ask Kendrick to leave the race, nor did Kendrick say that he would," is the statement just sent out by Bill Clinton's press office. For those not playing along, he means Kendrick Meek, the Democratic Senate candidate in Florida, who's not winning against an Independent (Charlie Crist) and a Tea Party candidate running as a Republican (Marco Rubio). He does know that this was in the Times today, I assume: "Matt McKenna, Mr. Clinton’s spokesman, said the former president had concluded that Mr. Meek’s candidacy was struggling and was urging him to drop out and endorse Charlie Crist."


Bill Clinton: Let's Blow Up That Oil Spill!

You know who sucks? James Cameron. He didn't stop the Gulf Oil Spill. Kevin Costner and his "Ocean Therapy Solutions"? Screw that dude. And Brad Pitt hasn't even started to try, but you know he's thinking about it, so to hell with him too. So now Bill Clinton says we're gonna have to blow that shit up. Celebrities! We're just at their mercy to fix our environmental disasters. Also watch how inane Wolf Blitzer is as he talks to old Bill about FEELING PEOPLE'S PAIN. You know what? Maybe each generation gets the environmental disaster that it deserves. They certainly get the media coverage of it that [...]


Jesus, do we hafta?

What the world needs now: The Death of American Virtue, "the first definitive history of the Clinton scandal" hits bookstores in February. Clicking in at 769 pages, it features new interviews with Monica Lewinsky and Ken Starr! Aren't you totally excited to relive those times?


Simpler Times Misremembered

"The TV Watch column on Thursday, about a 'Today' show appearance by Paula Deen, who lost her cooking shows after she admitted using racist language, misstated part of a comment by Bill Clinton in a reference to other public figures accused of wrongdoing. In 1998, responding to accusations that he had had an affair with Monica Lewinsky, Mr. Clinton said, 'I did not have sexual relations with that woman,' not 'I did not have sex with that woman.'" —God, remember 1998?


The Clinton/Obama Psychodrama

What is the relationship between Bill Clinton and Barack Obama? Well, they are both members of the Democratic party who have served as President of the United States. Also, they help fill the endless need for copy.


Man Eats Healthy

Remember that story about how Bill Clinton once ate an entire baked potato in one bite? Well, he could still do that now, so long as there was no butter or sour cream on it.


Bill Clinton off to Haiti Today to Bring the Aid Palin Demanded

Since Bill Clinton finished up running the White House last Friday, this morning he's on the way to Haiti, to clean up after Sarah Palin. Over the weekend, Palin made a shocking call for aid to Haiti, suggesting that "U.S. aid perhaps being lifted." She went on: "Again — not to get political — but if some of the politicians would come here and see the conditions, perhaps they would see a need for, say, a military airlift to come bring supplies that are so needed here." That is such a good idea she has! A military airlift you say. Maybe Bill Clinton will bring some [...]


People All Over The World Want To Have What Bill Clinton Had

"Since that first meal, in 2000, so many customers have uttered some variation of 'Give us what the president had,' that the restaurant has started serving a mixed-meat sampler—a one-off prepared for Mr. Clinton and his guests—as a nightly special. The Bill Clinton platter, as it is known, is an aromatic spread of mixed meats, lentils and oven-baked bread." —The Times' David Segal leaves the matter of how many of those customers at the New Delhi's fancy Bukhara actually meant 'an orgasm' up to the reader's imagination. Regardless, the story about our lovable ex-president's reputation as the world's greatest gourmand is nice to read. Clinton has [...]


How Bill Clinton Made America A Better Place

A new study with the deliberately unsexy title "Sex Redefined: The Reclassification Of Oral-Genital Contact" shows that a mere 20% of college students consider oral sex to be actual sex (98% think good old fashioned doing it falls under that rubric, and 78% say the same about anal, which, you know, I was totally born too late). That's half the number of college kids who felt mouth stuff belonged in the sex category when asked the same question in 1991. What explains the difference?


You Kept Bill Clinton From Helping The Gays

Last night Bill Clinton was in Pittsburgh delivering an address to the attendees of the Blognerd Convention, when a rude gentleman interrupted him and demanded he justify "Don't Ask Don't Tell" and the Defense of Marriage Act. After a humorous remark about health care town halls, the former President launched into a passionate defense of the actions he took on both those issues. It's amazing: I had never really understood until now what a firm supporter of the gay community Bill Clinton really was. If only all those terrible people hadn't prevented him from acting upon his convictions, we'd be living in a very different world right now.


Richard Nixon And Bill Clinton: The Love Letters

Two hearts, separated by time and history, yet united by later time and later history: This is the story of America's most beloved public figures, Richard Nixon and Bill Clinton, and the deep relationship they shared.

It was a different time, in the 1990s, and our society was not ready for these two men to publicly show such affection for one another. Like so many before them, Clinton and Nixon confined their relationship to letters and the occasional televised media event at the White House. Correspondence between the two star-crossed presidents is part of a new exhibit at the Nixon Presidential Library and Museum in Yorba Linda, California.


Man Shows Off

Are you a Bill Clinton or a Mindy Kaling? Don't lie.


Bill Clinton Plays The Generation Game

"I mean, all of this 'the greatest generation is World War II?' — it just happens that they're the most horrible parents in human history, right? If all of us baby boomers were so bad, then our parents were terrible; they failed. And if we were so bad, how come our kids are so great? We were hellaciously good parents. I think it's phony as a $3 bill. I think they had a chance to win World War II and it was clear. These are much more complex things [now]." —Bill Clinton doesn't believe in a "greatest generation."


Remember When Bill Clinton Was Destroying The Dignity Of The Presidency?

Noted American presidential scholar Pat Sajak compares Barack Obama to Bill Clinton and finds that—surprise!—the latter looks "presidential" while the current president does not. Here's a fun thing to guess: Once President Obama is out of office and there's another Democrat in the White House, what positive attributes will the conservatives who currently fulminate about Kenyan socialism discover in their attempts to diminish that future occupant? "Say what you will about Barack Obama, but at least he…" (Note: This assumes the world has not completely fallen apart and that there ever will be another Democrat in the White House.)


Don't Ask Don't Tell But Also Don't Lie

"Even fending off advances from male cadets can create problems. 'You can't say, Sorry guys, I'm gay,' the senior said. 'And if I say, I have a boyfriend, I'm breaking the honor code.' Breaching the Cadet Honor Code-'a cadet will not lie, cheat, steal or tolerate those who do'-can result in serious discipline." -A fascinating look today at how cadets at West Point in the era of Don't Ask Don't Tell live like they're in a Jason Bourne movie. This thing is going to look so crazy in the history books: it could almost be seen as a president's peccadilloes seeping into official state policy. It's like Clinton made [...]


Shirtwipegate: What Really Happened?

Controversy! Former Presidents George W. Bush and Bill Clinton clasped hands with residents of one of Haiti's massive tent cities Monday on a tour of its quake-devastated capital – a visit intended to remind donors of the immense needs facing the recovery effort.

After shaking hands with residents, Bush appeared to wipe his hand on Clinton's shirt, according to a video shot at the scene.

But is that indeed what we're seeing? I've watched the clip several times now, and here are the possibilities I've come up with.