“Brooklyn is our home and we’re already hard at work developing a freaky, space-age utopia that will give today’s creative visionaries a place to produce astonishing stories and leave their indelible thumbprint on the annals of history,” says a spokesperson for Vice.

It’s a good sign, I think, that even as it becomes clear that every Titus Andronicus song is assembled from the same small bag of parts, they still work well. The fundamentals: they are strong! [Via]

It has been more than a full moon cycle since one was able to purchase books published by Hachette in a reasonable manner from Amazon, which — despite selling books largely as an accident of history, and now essentially vestigially — has a forty percent share of new book sales in the U.S. But this hostage situation will apparently see only one resolution: the complete and utter capitulation of Hachette to whatever Amazon is demanding. Russ Grandinetti, a Kindle executive, told the Wall Street Journal that Amazon “was willing to suffer some damage to its reputation and was simply doing what is ‘in the long-term interest of our customers.’” Books were nice while they lasted, right?

Humans naturally gravitate toward easy chronologies, since it’s how our brains work or whatever. So it’s logical that after we all secretly teleported back to the vague (and vaguely historical!) era of “pre-Prohibition” to find a fancy booze culture worth restoring and replicating in metropolises across the globe, we would then creep forward in time from those hazy origins of the late eighteen hundreds or early nineteen hundreds, and revivify and adapt what we found next.

But, recently, as we progressed from Jerry Thomas’s Improved Whiskey Cocktail through Harry Craddock’s Corpse Reviver #2 and Trader Vic’s Planter’s Punch, we slipped into the hazy era between the fifties and the seventies when our parents, and their parents, finished the long work of Prohibition and ruined cocktail culture completely. In 2013, two places in New York, The Butterfly and Golden Cadillac, revived that particular strain of baroque and often disgusting mid-century food and drink culture, but like you know, with good ingredients and care, man.

The Butterfly, taking its inspiration from mid-century Wisconsin supper clubs, offered drinks like a reformed Grasshopper:

At the base of our Grasshopper is crème de cacao and crème de menthe. We add a bit of backbone with aged rum and a bit of depth with the minty Italian Fernet Branca Menta. Orange juice is added for acidity, and a bit of water thins the mix out. Un-homogenized milk is heated to boiling and lemon juice is added while still hot. The lemon juice turns the milk solid and all the color from the Fernet, rum and cacao are removed. It is a very labor intensive process to strain the punch until it runs clear.

And a refined Whiskey Sour:

As mentioned in the Tom Collins description, sour mix was very popular when entertaining at home during the middle of the 20th century. The whiskey sour is a very early cocktail found in many old cocktail books but it really rose to prominence in the 1960’s. My father’s favorite drink is made fresh here at The Butterfly rather than with bottled sour mix. Maple syrup adds a bit of Americana to this version and Angostura bitters adds a bit of depth to what is a very simple but satisfying drink.

There’s also an Old Fashioned whose description is as long as two Knausgaard novels. The Golden Cadillac, which went full seventies — in the decor, the vibe and the bathroom wallpaper — turns out Hot Buttery Nipples with “butter-and-cacao-infused Jameson,” Long Island Iced Teas, but taken seriously, and the “70s old fashioned,” which means “rye, brandy, honey, orange, cherry, bitters.”

Anyways, this whole trend of sorts has been mildly upsetting to Jim Meehan of PDT, perhaps the ne plus ultra of the speakeasy bars, which one enters through a phone booth in a hot dog joint. (It is, in fairness to over-the-top theatricality, the best of the New York speakeasyish bars.) The other week, Meehan groused:

People who are probably not the best students of history have started pushing the historic pendulum a little too far forward. I don’t think we should be drinking Long Island iced teas again. I don’t think we should be drinking these disco-era drinks because, from a historical perspective, we know once we start serving those, people stop drinking cocktails. We know what happens next. Instead of pushing us into the ’60s and ’70s, which is like jumping off a cliff, we need to make cocktail bars fun and we need to make them accessible, but we don’t need to make ourselves obsolete.

It turns out that Meehan was correct, insofar as Golden Cadillac is closing tomorrow, to reopen with a different concept, even though of the two, Golden Cadillac managed to pull the gambit off more successfully than The Butterfly, whose drinks would not shake a certain quality of uncanniness that made them mildly unpleasant to quaff.

The lesson, if there is one, is to leave the seventies where they are — and probably everything that came after them too.

Photo

Game on! #BELvsUSA pic.twitter.com/8BIy7AuVmg

— Cinnabon (@Cinnabon) July 1, 2014

Let’s win this one @USsoccer — and then celebrate with a snack. #tothevictorgotheOreos #USAvsBEL

— Oreo Cookie (@Oreo) July 1, 2014

We believe in Better pizza, and #USA! Do you? #BetterIngredients #BetterFutbol

— Papa John’s Pizza (@PapaJohns) July 1, 2014

Want a #soccer player on the Wheaties box? You can make it happen! http://t.co/6xnKVqZc1e pic.twitter.com/8fmqV3Wy76

— General Mills (@GeneralMills) July 1, 2014

When we stand together as a nation, it’s easier to find the strength to #powerthrough. #USA #BEL #worldcup pic.twitter.com/YmklK0cm2r

— POWERADE (@POWERADE) July 1, 2014

Breathing a minty sigh of relief after that awesome save. Let’s GO, #USMNT! #USAvsBEL #PassTheLove pic.twitter.com/QZ8NffG1Bt

— Trident Gum (@tridentgum) July 1, 2014

All we want for #USA’s birthday is a win today! Go #USA! Rules: http://t.co/Dj1Mrj8euN #JCPCup #JCPScoreOnHeaders #GiveMeAYellowCardJCP

— JCPenney (@jcpenney) July 1, 2014

If your boss doesn’t believe that you have a “doctor’s appointment” right now, grab a @SNICKERS #WorldCup #BELvUSA

— SNICKERS® (@SNICKERS) July 1, 2014

Our colors are red, white and blue. Who do you think we’re rooting for? #IBelieveThatWeWillWin

— Crest (@Crest) July 1, 2014

We believe in Better pizza, and #USA! Do you? #BetterIngredients #BetterFutbol

— Papa John’s Pizza (@PapaJohns) July 1, 2014

Everyone take a few minutes to relax. Then let’s all get back to believing. Go #USA.

— Buffalo Wild Wings (@BWWings) July 1, 2014

#Whatif USA won today? #IBelieveThatWeWillWin #Jif

— Jif® Peanut Butter (@Jif) July 1, 2014

R/T if you’re cheering on the USA with us today! #IBelieveThatWeWillWin

— Smucker’s (@smuckers) July 1, 2014

RT if you’re #TeamUSA! Watching from our HQ on the big screen. #ShareYourSpirit #BELvsUSA pic.twitter.com/0y59o9c87N

— Panasonic USA (@PanasonicUSA) July 1, 2014

Lots of bold calls for the coach. A #DOMORE general does whatever it takes to win.

— Degree Men (@DegreeMen) July 1, 2014

Think he’d come work for me? #FreakyFastYedlin MT @kmcorder: Deandre Yedlin is faster than Jimmy John’s delivering a sub #WorldCup #USAvsBEL

— Jimmy John’s (@jimmyjohns) July 1, 2014

OHH CHIP! That just happened. #USMNT #PassTheLove #USAvsBEL pic.twitter.com/b2CvF63FhH

— Chips Ahoy (@ChipsAhoy) July 1, 2014

Tide believes we will be victorious today. #IBelieve #KeepItClean http://t.co/6MNpeDSHkn

— Tide (@tide) July 1, 2014

@tide Go, USA! #KeepItClean

— Sally Lau (@Sally_Lau5) July 1, 2014

Ah well. Good game anyway, America. Maybe next time!

★★★★ What might have been a rural dream broke to twittering birds in the predawn dimness, the sound carrying up to the 27th floor. Out in the real morning, the clouds were interfering with the sun, and a damp breeze from downtown contended against the heat in a low-intensity pushing match. New tar shone wetly at the edge of a repaired patch in the street. In the afternoon, a line of cloud like a wing stretched along the sky in the west. It was hot up on the roof, but a heat cut by breezes, a fine natural heat, superior by far to the grim air conditioning below. A heat for louvered shades and cross-ventilation, for architectural counterrevolution. Dried red Japanese maple leaves lay curled up in the corner like dead insects. Down in the street, the balance of hot sun and breeze was less favorable. On the way toward the river in the late light, the sidewalk texture was overdefined, while everything higher up was impossible to look at. After sunset, the east and west alike were unobtrusively washed with pink, as was the south, at an avenue crossing. Fireflies seemed possible in the twilight, and then there they were, in the deeper shade by Lincoln Towers, brightening as they floated upward.

The Case For Just Getting In That Van

“When dollar vans first appeared in Queens, they faced significant opposition from city authorities, transit unions, and local police. But Queens is notable for how enmeshed vans have become in the borough’s transportation landscape. There are almost twice as many legal dollar vans in Queens as in Brooklyn and far fewer unlicensed, illegal vans. Vans in Queens have been afforded several loading and unloading spaces. In Queens, vans are starting to function like an official transportation system.” –The city’s burgeoning gray market van system sounds… kind of great?

Zella Day, “East of Eden”

“Beginning in July, AP will initially check automated stories before they are published. But the goal is to be fully automated by the end of the year.” — Will you care when your news is written by machines? Will you accuse the machines of bias, malice, or ignorance, and do so in the comments? Or will this hallowed national pastime lose its appeal and fade away? It’s not the same, throwing rotten tomatoes at a projection screen; who will bother to impugn the robot writers?

Hobby Lobby doesn’t want its health plans to provide contraception to its employees, and the Supreme Court says that’s fine. So where is a conscientious shopper supposed to go now? Some recommendations.

Doll face with closeable eyes
Try DollsPart Supply!

Plush monkey magnet with very long arms
Try BigZoo!

German Hanomag SDKFZ 251/1 model kit
Try Amazon!

Sock shaper
Maybe try letting your socks be themselves.

Zero birthday candle
Are you zero? You don’t need a candle because you do not exist. Are you ten? Just get ten normal candles. Are you twenty or older? You’re too old for candles.

“This shirt is illegal” shirt
Draw a cross on a normal shirt. OR: Take off your pants and go outside, which is illegal in even more countries. Happy shopping!