Great. People have figured out how to convert basic human organ function into electric energy. “The act of breathing-of moving the ribs to draw air into the lungs and expel it-can generate about a watt of power,” according to an article by Henry Fountain in today’s NYT Science Times. “And if the potato actually gets up off the couch and walks briskly across the room, each heel strike can produce even more power, about 70 watts’ worth. That energy could be put to work, charging a cellphone, say, or a medical sensor in the body. The problem is how to harvest it.”

But now some scientists at Princeton-who must have never seen The Matrix-have developed a system through housing highly efficient piezoelectric crystals, which generate electricity when bent, in a flexible, skin-safe rubberlike material. Strap ’em on and let our moving parts-even our involuntary moving parts-make the sparks fly. “A first application might be in shoes,” Fountain reports, “to produce enough power to keep a music player or phone charged. But the eventual goal would be to make a flexible power generator that could be implanted in the chest or elsewhere.” Better, because, we won’t certainly won’t be walking anywhere briskly inside our individual-sized umbilical biopods.

The great Mississippi writer Barry Hannah passed away yesterday at the age of 67. “Barry could somehow make the English sentence generous and unpredictable, yet still make wonderful sense, which for readers is thrilling. You never knew the source of the next word. But he seemed to command the short story form and the novel form and make those forms up newly for himself,” said friend Richard Ford. Hannah’s Airships is one of the last century’s greatest collections of short stories, and was a prominent influence on many of today’s writers, particularly George Saunders.

Huh. A month ago, we offered a list of suggestions as to which Peter Gabriel song each artist he covered on his song-swap project Scratch My Back should cover in return. Today we learn that the dutiful Canadians in Arcade Fire have indeed gone with our pick, and are currently working on a version of Gabriel’s 1980 hit “Games Without Frontiers.” The Magnetic Fields’ Stephen Merritt had apparently already recorded “Not One of Us” before hearing he was assigned “Don’t Give Up.” And it seems Paul Simon simply DISOBEYED US (?!) choosing to try his hand at “Biko” instead of “Solsbury Hill” as we’d recommended. (Jeez, “Biko.” For a little guy, Simon’s got balls the size of Garfunkel’s hair. I guess you gotta give him credit. But this one has Capeman written all over it.)

“The earthquake that killed more than 700 people in Chile on Feb. 27 probably shifted the Earth’s axis and shortened the day, a National Aeronautics and Space Administration scientist said. Earthquakes can involve shifting hundreds of kilometers of rock by several meters, changing the distribution of mass on the planet. This affects the Earth’s rotation, said Richard Gross, a geophysicist at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Pasadena, California, who uses a computer model to calculate the effects.” Scientists expect the planet’s chronological balance to be restored during this Sunday’s Academy Awards ceremony, which, with ten best picture nominees, is gonna take forever.

Yeah, this Paterson stuff is not going to get any prettier.

Even though he could TOTALLY beat incumbent Senator Kirsten Gillibrand in a primary contest-really, don’t you believe him?-Tennessee transplant Harold Ford, Jr., has decided not to run against her, reports the New York Times. Ford has a piece explaining his decision in tomorrow’s Op-Ed section of the paper, which is apparently where people go now when they want to pretend that they dropped out of a race for reasons other than the fact that they had no chance of winning.

What? Why? Huh? I have no idea about the answer to ANY of these questions. Still, this video is EXACTLY how I imagine a Politico editorial meeting to be-especially the voicework. Anyway, too good not to share. Enjoy!

by copyranter

It was supposed to be a Canada-Russia Olympic final-with a subplot of Sidney Crosby vs. Alexander Ovechkin-continuing an international hockey rivalry that really began in 1972 with the epic Summit Series (a series that made Paul Henderson, and his shot heard round the world, a national hero forever).

But then, the US shocked Canada 5–3 in the preliminary round. “Fluke,” every Canadian fan nervously thought, as their team outplayed and outshot the Americans 45–23. However, in Sunday’s wonderful gold medal game, coach Ron Wilson’s young underdog squad played the mighty, talented Canadians dead even.

Yes, Crosby, thanks to a sweet pass from Jarome Iginla (and bad coverage by US defenseman Brian Rafalski), saved his country’s ass in overtime with a no-look wrist shot between the pads of tournament MVP Ryan Miller. Here’s a replay, if you missed it:

But before that, Minnesotan and New Jersey Devil Zach Parise made Canada soil its collective midnight blue breeches by jamming in a frantic tying goal with Miller pulled with 25 seconds left in regulation play. The subsequent seven minutes of 4-on-4 overtime play was the most riveting hockey action I’ve ever seen.

The US’s rise as a hockey power is, relatively speaking, a recent development. Before the Miracle On Ice of 1980, American players rarely made it to the NHL level. While a few members of the Lake Placid team went on to have decent pro careers, none of them became a superstar.

In 1981, the much-hyped Bobby Carpenter became the first American-born player drafted in the first round. He scored 53 goals in the fourth season of an otherwise mediocre career.

The best ever US player? Mike Modano is a good pick, as is Jeremy Roenick-though he was just horrible as a color commentator in Vancouver. I say it’s Connecticut-born and former New York Ranger defenseman Brian Leetch. (Just to limit the scoffing about my pick, know that I despise the Rangers.)

As the other horrible Olympics color commentator (seriously, NBC, why these morons?) Mike Milbury pointed out, probably only three or four of the US players could have made the Canadian squad. But the Americans were younger and faster than their northern rivals. And goalie Miller may be the best in the world betwixt the pipes. He’s certainly the best American goalie since former Ranger Mike Richter, and maybe of all time.

A big reason why Canada was sweating Sunday’s game was because the US stunned Canada in OT for the gold medal at the World Junior Hockey Championships (under 20-year-olds) earlier this year in Saskatoon. Canada had won the tournament the previous five years in a row. Here was winning goal:

If the Canadians had lost to America again in OT, again on home turf, it may not have been safe for Yanks to cross the border for a few years. Well, okay, it probably would have. But the Canadians would have been awfully displeased with their neighbors to the south.

Copyranter is an ad copywriter who blogs about advertising here. Before selling out, he was a sports reporter for several small newspapers, including a daily where he covered the Philadelphia Flyers. He knows his way around a rink, having majored in hockey in college-which led to his graduating with a 2.8 GPA in Communications and a wicked wrist shot.

Good news! Leonard Cohen made $9.5 million last year. Poor guy needed the cash.

Oh of course, the old bananas exploding on face trick! Next time I’d like to see it without the mask, buddy. And with apples. [Via]