by Abe Sauer

President’s policies have done nothing but accrue massive amounts of debt & cause employment to remain high http://t.co/TQZ9Vg5less than a minute ago via web

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Senator Ron Johnson
SenRonJohnson

Not only is Wisconsin Senator Ron Johnson getting so robotic about his debt ceiling protest talking points that he’s now apparently praising Obama for creating high employment — his echo chamber is going along for the ride too. That was retweeted by popular right wing radio host Charlie Sykes — author of Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But Can’t Read, Write, or Add.

Ron Johnson, you’ll remember, holds Russ Feingold’s old seat.

Two days ago it became known that, a month ago, a youngster at the Huffington Post did a terrible job “summarizing” an Ad Age thing, and the Ad Age writer (Awl pal Simon Dumenco) reasonably beefed about the amount of taking versus linking, and the Huffington Post… suspended their writer indefinitely. This is along the lines of arresting hookers instead of johns, or drug users instead of drug importers, or something. The writer, who seems to be Yale class of (something fairly recent), Amy Lee, was doing pretty much what she’d been trained to do, either overtly or covertly, and she took the fall for the HuffPo, which is so obviously baloney. Isn’t it bad enough that she has a terrible job, writing up news blurbs that no one reads (part of Ad Age’s complaint is that the Huffington Post didn’t actually send any traffic, but it’s obvious from the HuffPo page that barely anyone saw that particular page, unlike some of her other aggregations on other boring topics), when her real-world interests are actually opera, contemporary classical music, poetry and art films.

So the Huffington Post thinks it gets off clean from these entrenched practices by temporarily canning a smart young person who’s doing one of their terrible jobs as a way to get into writing and as a way to pay bills. It shouldn’t.

The data suggests the people who have average or low incomes are way less likely to own iPhones! That is so inexplicable. (via)

by Joe Berkowitz

You know the tone people employ when announcing that they don’t own a TV. Casually tossed off, yet firmly resolute; it’s the same tone that might be used to dispel any other unflattering misrepresentation (e.g., “Oh, I don’t have syphilis.”). The funny thing is that nobody ever actually asks the question, “Do you own a TV?”

Unfortunately, there are scads of people who seem convinced they’re blowing everyone’s minds with the announcement. Others, meanwhile, manage to keep TV-free homes without ever drawing attention to it. The mere fact of not owning a television does not make a person insufferable (although it certainly does help.) As with so much else in life, it’s the way that the information is conveyed that makes the difference. Sometimes it’s a pre-emptive conversational tourniquet, stanching the flow of any entertainment-related questions to come. Other times it’s a lifestyle signpost, the implications of which are murky at best. And then, of course, once in a while it’s a sort of long-form birth certificate that proves one’s subscription to The Economist.

In any case, once TV ownership is disavowed, what follows is a weird limbo moment where any number of responses seems appropriate. Do you:
• Empathize? (“I can plainly see why you choose not to own The Devil’s Box.”)
• Confront? (“DO YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE BETTER THAN ME!”)
• Condescend? (“Aw, you’re adorable.”)
• One-up? (“I don’t even know what televisions ARE.”)

It all depends on what kind of ‘I Don’t Have a TV’ person you’ve got.

The Pauper
First up, there’s the person who could probably afford a TV, but definitely can’t afford cable and so isn’t even bothering. To say that his apartment is spartanly furnished would be an exercise in understatement. It sort of looks like the white room in The Matrix (an allusion that many people on this list would claim not to understand). Managing to get along without television is the least of The Pauper’s problems, though, and doing so is by no means a political or philosophical statement. The Pauper enjoys watching shows, but frankly, there are more pressing matters on his mind, like getting food and keeping enough clean clothes around to avoid looking like a hobo-clown.

Best response: Extend an open invite to watch TV at your place sometime.

The Shrugger
Not everybody is interested in the same things as everybody else. That’s a given. Some people legitimately have no interest in movies or TV shows and therefore have no need for a television. That’s the Shrugger. It’s not a matter of self-identification, just a personal preference. Perhaps her parents didn’t let her watch TV as a kid and then she never cottoned to it later on. She occasionally enjoys watching shows in a group situation, but just doesn’t really care for the experience overall, and it’s not that big a deal. She recognizes and allows that TV can be an entertaining diversion for some, and she doesn’t begrudge others their viewing habits. Neither does she have any delusions that by forgoing a TV she is making a bid for intellectual sainthood.

Best response: Smile and let her know she’s not missing that much (whether or not you believe this to be true).

The Efficiency Expert
Much like the Shrugger, The Efficiency Expert simply doesn’t have much of an interest in movies and shows, except in her case the indifference stems from an attitude that time spent on such frivolity is an irresponsible waste of a finite resource. By abstaining from that most highly engrossing of all pieces of furniture, she is making a statement that time is money and she’s not leaving any money on the table. The Efficiency Expert may have the live-and-let-live attitude of the Shrugger, but may also take a passive-aggressive poke at those who squander their time by tuning in.

Best response: Change subjects, perhaps to the tax code.

The Professor
“You just don’t know, man. You don’t even know. Allow me to detonate some truth-bombs in your mind-shaft. Are you ready for this? Commercials aren’t the crap in between shows — shows are the crap in between commercials. Boom. Take a moment to collect the shattered fragments of your psyche. By turning on your TV, you are bending over in a manner known throughout the animal kingdom as ‘presenting.’ Every moment spent sunk into your couch cushions, glassy eyes fixed on ‘Total Request Live’ or ‘Beavis and Butthead,’ you’re allowing the indoctrination to continue. You receive messages all day long and make the purchases that perpetuate this consumerist dystopia. The propaganda merchants have locked you into a zombie lifestyle that you aren’t even aware of. Baa, sheep, baa. I want to hear you say it.”

Best response: Pretend that you work for the CIA, and then “recruit” this person on a “mission” to destroy “Time Warner Cable headquarters.”

The Poseur
Of all known varietals of “I Don’t Own a TV” people, The Poseur is definitely the most likely to annoy. Even the most tangential subject matter will prompt this person to mention that thing he doesn’t own, and he seems to equate this lack of ownership with an enlightened, progressive ethos. He may or may not have a job or a band or whatever, but he definitely has a laptop and a thirst for entertainment. For the Poseur, the unspoken second half of the sentence “Oh, I don’t own a TV” is “but I frequently watch stuff online.” Not owning a TV is fine, volunteering that information unprompted is questionable, but doing so when you’re intimately familiar with the third season of “Mad Men” is unacceptable.

Best response: Agree that there’s definitely no way to be aware of the negative aspects of television and also own one. Bring up other messages best enjoyed without considering their mediums, like the football-playing of Michael Vick or the filmography of Roman Polanski. Make sure and let the person know that you only got your TV to better understand what was going on in your Twitter feed.

Joe Berkowitz edits books and writes stuff. He also has a tumblr.

Photo by zzkt.

“Morrissey sustained hand and arm injuries recently after being attacked by a dog in England.” I wonder if black is how he tastes on the inside. [Via]

In case you were unaware, it’s hot out there, and is going to be especially so until late tomorrow:

A HEAT ADVISORY REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM 10 AM THIS MORNING TO 9 PM EDT TUESDAY…. A HEAT ADVISORY IS ISSUED FOR NEW YORK CITY WHEN THE COMBINATION OF HEAT AND HUMIDITY IS EXPECTED TO MAKE IT FEEL LIKE IT IS AT LEAST 95 DEGREES FOR TWO CONSECUTIVE DAYS…OR 100 DEGREES FOR ANY LENGTH OF TIME. TAKE EXTRA PRECAUTIONS IF YOU WORK OR SPEND TIME OUTSIDE. WHEN POSSIBLE…RESCHEDULE STRENUOUS ACTIVITIES TO EARLY MORNING OR EVENING. KNOW THE SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS OF HEAT EXHAUSTION AND HEAT STROKE. WEAR LIGHT WEIGHT AND LOOSE FITTING CLOTHING WHEN POSSIBLE AND DRINK PLENTY OF WATER.

Hydration is important! Those of you who need to maintain a certain level of alcohol in your system to prevent convulsions are advised to alternate your drinks with a glass of water or beer. Ice, while usually frowned upon, is permitted in situations like this one. Painful though it may be, try to restrict yourself to “mixed” drinks, like bourbon and branch, vodka and soda or gin with a cider chaser. No one will judge you. At least not until the heat index drops back down into the 80’s.

Photo by skampy

I’m not sure I really even know what cosplay is, other than that lots of people do it, and not necessarily for sex, just for fun and coolness, but the other night I was watching The Switch, one of the best movies of 2010, despite its problematic insemination issues, and (no spoilers!) at one point there’s a kid’s birthday party and all the adults are dressed in pirate hats and you can’t help but think: wouldn’t it be sexy and fun to dress up as a pirate or a lion or something like that sometimes? It’d be like you were in an Adam Ant video all the time! There just aren’t enough excuses these days to dress up in elaborate costumes. (Also, think of the truly excellent costume party in Beginners! Who wouldn’t want to meet Ewan McGregor when he’s dressed as Freud and also carrying a puppy? I mean, what more do you need, shoes made out of chocolate cake?) Anyway, Comic-Con is coming and the goose is getting fat, please fashion for yourself a complicated hat. But who to dress up as even? I totally get stumped there. Just don’t leave your sexy funtime costume thingies laying around or half of Chicago gets evacuated.

“My wife has purchased a half-dozen pairs of lucky socks that she wears to the clinic. They have monkeys, ninjas, and moustaches on them. The doctor likes them. My wife gets into the stirrups. The doctor puts things into my wife’s vagina — they are always putting things into my wife’s vagina — and the doctor says, ‘I like your monkeys.’ I watch, leaning on the cabinet that contains gauze and syringes.”
 — The Age of Mechanical Reproduction.

“Researchers at University of California, Berkeley found that people are drawn to potential romantic partners if they are of their own or similar league and desirability, which they called the ‘matching hypothesis’.”

“It’s a frozen lump of frozen gases and I suppose not a terribly friendly place. Let’s wish it a happy birthday but perhaps let’s keep as far away from it as we can as it won’t give you a welcome.”
 — British astronomer Alan Chapman, on the fact that tomorrow will mark the first anniversary of the discovery of of Neptune — in Neptunian years, which are 164.79 times longer than Earth years. It was on September 24, 1896 that Johann Gottfried Galle, using theoretical predictions made earlier by French mathematician Urbain Jean Joseph Le Verrier (and, of course, a telescope) officially discovered the eighth planet in our solar system, 4.4 billion kilometres away.