Summer fade: Sunset today is at 8:01. It’s the last time we’ll see sunset after 8pm, until May 10thless than a minute ago via web

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I told ya, summer’s over. Good riddance!

“Processed red meats such as hotdogs and cold cuts, the same things that make you fat and give you heart disease, may also increase your risk of diabetes. And while that might not sound too surprising — something you might file in the ‘oh well, everything I like is bad for me’ category — the degree to which processed meats are associated with diabetes is shockingly high, according to researchers at Harvard School of Public Health. Just a daily serving of 50 grams — that’s about two slices of cold cuts or one hot dog — is associated with more than a 50-percent increase in the risk of developing diabetes.”

“People who are bad at maths were probably born that way, according to groundbreaking new research. The study found the ability to work with numbers may be something that is entirely pre-destined — you either have it or you don’t.”

Trickery and deceit! “A Gloucester blogger admitted yesterday that he knew a group of lobstermen were only joking around about trying to catch lobsters that were tossed back in the ocean late last week by some Buddhists seeking good karma.” Related: Gloucester Blogger would be a terrible name for a band.

“An effective architecture critic is not a messenger from the occult, sometimes cultish, world of parametric modeling, interstitial planning, void filling, and impenetrable whatevers. But the critic does need to understand that stuff in order to better explain how architecture not only shapes the city but manifests our values, identity and legacy as a culture.”
 — Architecture folks are still worried about an art guy taking over the Times architecture slot

. Yeah, what’s next: a metro reporter doing op-ed? A culture editor taking over the restaurant reviews? Chaos!

The video for the new song from the National features Jonathan Franzen walking around the remote Chilean Island of Alejandro Selkirk, mourning the loss of David Foster Wallace with the hand puppet from the classic video for LCD Soundsystem’s “New York, I love You But You’re Bringing Me Down.” Oh, wait. I should watch it again. That might not actually be Jonathan Franzen.

The selection of Philip Levine as poet laureate affords the Times the opportunity to run his amazing “What Work Is,” which you should absolutely read right now.

And now we enter phase three of massive social unrest, in which the media wonders: who are “the looters” and why might they be “upset”? Literally: “The crowds involved in violence and looting are drawn from a complex mix of social and racial backgrounds.” Oh I see. And: “Two girls who took part in Monday night’s riots in Croydon have boasted that they were showing police and ‘the rich’ that ‘we can do what we want.’” Why didn’t anyone tell the media before that England was populated with a huge resentful underclass? WHY WAS THERE NOT A PRESS RELEASE ABOUT THIS?

“The point of Bert and Ernie was never to discuss the types of compromise and conflict resolution required to make long-term relationships functional. It was about friendship, always. There is, as the final quote in this article points out, absolutely no reason to brush a patina of ACTUAL SEX onto this relationship. It’s not undefined because the Children’s Television Workshop was too scared to have a gay couple due to societal pressure but now it can be defined because the cultural values are shifting. It’s undefined because THEY ARE PUPPETS ON SESAME STREET AND NONE OF THE GODDAMNED PUPPETS ARE MARRIED BECAUSE THAT’S NOT AN ISSUE THAT NEEDS TO BE EXPLORED FOR PRE-SCHOOLERS. Just let these dudes collect paper clips and learn how to spell A-P-P-L-E-S-A-U-C-E for heaven’s sake.”
 — The homophobes over at Videogum can’t bear the thought of Bert and Ernie getting married, probably because their hearts are full of hate.

Among the many other monstrous crimes for which they are responsible, carbs cause acne. Yes, “pizzaface” is literally a thing! Also attributed to acne-accumulation: stress. Here is my prescription for face management: Drink a bunch to reduce stress and then opt for wings rather than mozzarella sticks to keep the carb count low. Consider yourself cured. (P.S. I am not doctor.)