Football Pick Haikus For Week 14

Thursday, December 8

At Pittsburgh -14 Cleveland
Is Colt McCoy the
Quarterback of the Future?
Then Browns’ Future Sucks. PICK: BROWNS

Sunday, December 11

At Baltimore -16.5 Indianapolis
Baltimore only
shows up against the good teams.
This could be closer. PICK: COLTS

At Cincinnati -3 Houston
Bengals must win
and the Texans are starting
a third string QB. PICK: BENGALS

At Green Bay -11 Oakland
Everyone will play
the Packers tough from now on.
Pack will stay perfect. PICK: RAIDERS

At NY Jets -10 Kansas City
The Chiefs could play
major spoilers this weekend.
But they suck so bad. PICK: JETS

At Detroit -8 Minnesota
Lions’ death spiral
will include a loss to the
purple grim reapers. PICK: VIKINGS

New Orleans -2.5 At Tennessee
Titans’ Chris Johnson
has singlehandedly cost
me my fantasy league. PICK: SAINTS

At Miami -3 Philadelphia
The Dream Team turned out
to be all wet and not in
a fun kind of way. PICK: DOLPHINS

New England -8 At Washington
Two Redskins got
suspended for drug abuse.
Season up in smoke. PICK: PATRIOTS

Atlanta -2.5 At Carolina
The Falcons could be
so much better, but they are
like a moldy peach. PICK: PANTHERS

At Jacksonville PK At Tampa Bay
It’s West versus East!
The Battle for Florida!
Tens of fans are psyched! PICK: Jaguars

San Francisco -4 At Arizona
The only Cardinal
anyone cares about is
J. Albert Pujols. PICK: 49ers

At Denver -3.5 Chicago
Chicago has no
Quarterback or running back.
Tebow will run wild. PICK: BRONCOS

At San Diego -7 Buffalo
The Gaslight District
of San Diego is kind of
like New Orleans Light. PICK: BILLS

At Dallas -3.5 NY Giants
The Giants almost
beat the Packers but almost
only counts in other things PICK: GIANTS

Monday, December 12

At Seattle -5.5 St. Louis
Move this game out of
Seattle and move it straight
to Football Hades. PICK: SEAHAWKS

Last week’s Haiku Picks went 7–9. Season to date is 88–103–6.

Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.