In early 2003, when evidence emerged that plans for war against Iraq were not merely afoot, but were looking more and more like a fait accompli, the French advised the luridly stupid and prevaricating administration of Bush II against an invasion. This sound suggestion was roundly condemned by nearly every Republican who could get in front of a microphone, culminating in possibly the dumbest episode of the run-up to the war: the announcement of Representatives Robert W. Ney and Walter B. Jones, Jr. that thenceforth the various House restaurants would be serving "freedom fries," rather than French fries. "This action today is a small but symbolic effort to show [...]

"We'll get to your needs in a minute. Here's what would be great from my point of view, and which would make up entirely for the time I was in the Marais with my pregnant wife and this jumped-up little terrier in a Basque restaurant sneered at us for arriving without a reservation at his entirely empty restaurant at 6 p.m. He was plenty sophisticated-European. He responded to our request for a table for two with a curt, 'Non,' adding that all the tables-he even swept his arm back to indicate them-were reserved. So do me a favor and take your husband to Peter Luger in Brooklyn and see [...]

"Computer giant Apple could face legal action in France over an iPhone app which tells users whether thousands of celebrities are Jewish or not. The application’s designer, who is Jewish himself, says he invented it for entertainment not racial profiling."

The line at Grimaldi's yesterday afternoon stretched halfway down the waterfront Dumbo block, as it does most days-the pizza place has developed a reputation, through TV spots and gushing travel book write-ups, for being "the best." But the pie-seeking clientele may not linger on that Brooklyn sidewalk for long: tomorrow, the landlord will walk into the state supreme court and ask for the eviction of the institution, possibly forcing Grimaldi's to move from its flagship locale.

"'Between Michel [Houellebecq] getting the Goncourt and Virginie Despentes winning le Renaudot,' [Frédéric] Beigbeder exclaims, 'a whole generation—our generation—has finally won!' There's a brief silence, and we must all think the same thing without saying it: If we’ve won and there's nothing to fight for, it’s probably downhill from here." —Yes, après succès, now comes the… dénouement. Let's all buckle down for the entertaining dissolution of France's formerly striving and now-entrenched weirdo intellectual class!