Posts Tagged: Texas

Citizen: Big Government is Taxing Our Texas Dogs!

The Malakoff News serves (part of) Henderson County—county seat, Athens, Texas—overall home to almost 90,000 28,000 households. And just like the fictional town of Dillon, Texas, Henderson, if those fatcats in the Texas House have their way, will be redistricted into two districts. Henderson, says the paper, is the only county in the state to be butchered up in such a fashion, and the locals are ticked off. Then the robocalls started, blaming their (Republican) state representative for it all, and asking citizens to call him up. Unfortunately, the freshman is actually not on the redistricting committee. Meanwhile, closer to Malakoff? They are trying to [...]


Juarez Isn't Even the Most Dangerous City in the Americas

In defense of Texas Governor Rick Perry, who called Juarez “the most dangerous city in America," it's not like El Paso and Juarez aren't deeply intertwined and immediately abutting—as you will recall from when the MEXICAN SPY DRONE landed on (BARELY) AMERICAN SOIL in El Paso. Though, in many ways, they have nothing in common! Contrary to what the right-wing border militia winguts say, America's border cities often have an admirable crime rate. (Also, I would not agree that Juarez is the most dangerous city in the Americas, either. Have you been to Bogota and St. Louis recently?)


Mexico Keeping The Lights On In Texas

"Mexico's state electricity company on Wednesday started supplying electricity to Texas, where cold weather and power shortages forced rolling blackouts across the state. Mexico's Federal Electricity Commission issued a statement saying it 'was determined to support Texas with electrical energy' as its neighbor to the north scrambled to deal with its power woes."


The Chupacabra Is Real, And It's Hanging Out Texas

Has the dreaded chupacabra-the mysterious goat-sucker of legend-finally been found in Hood County? Yeah, sure, why not. COWER IN FEAR OF THE CHUPACABRA, people!


Texas Guv Not Exactly Challenging Texan Gubernatorial Stereotypes

"Standing inside a warehouse that makes fluid sealing products for the petrochemical industry, Perry said the Texas program for permitting pollutants from petrochemical plants has helped improve air quality." -Texas governor Rick Perry, objecting to a threat by the Environmental Protection Agency to remove the state's regulatory authority over air quality due to the state's continuing noncompliance with the Clean Air Act, is defiant in his-wait a second, does that really say, "Standing inside a warehouse that makes fluid sealing products for the petrochemical industry"? Yes, yes it does. Sigh. Texas. It's like a whole other country.


Texas Believes In The Sanctity Of Heterosexual Divorce

"Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott is appealing [a decision allowing a lesbian couple who were married in Massachusetts to get a divorce in Texas.] He also is appealing a divorce granted to a gay couple in Dallas, saying protecting the 'traditional definition of marriage' means doing the same for divorce."


Health Care Reform: Job Killer?

Our nation's employees are already starting to feel the effects of Obamacare-right in the paycheck! Or so says a supposed dermatologist who claims to have fired an employee who voted for the President. Posting to the message board-apparently a forum for a group of people who weren't smart enough to get into UT-someone calling himself "dermdoc" bragged about relieving an employee of his or her livelihood because of the choice they made in the 2008 presidential election. "Laid off my first Obama voting employee today," boasted the poster.


Restaurant's Appeal Seems Predicated Upon Its Controversial Appellation Rather Than The Quality Of Its Comestibles

"But while the name will get you in the door, the food won’t necessarily keep you coming back. 'Supa Fly Ho with Cheese' was not especially juicy—or fatty, as the restaurant’s name would suggest—and the patty itself was almost charred." New Waco, TX eatery Fat Ho Burgers—where menu items include "the Bad Mamajama, the Fat Chicken Ho, the Sloppy Ho brisket sandwich and, curiously, A Fat Ho Named Bertha"—has been receiving widespread publicity since its recent opening (and inspiring the classic bit of local news you see above), but the actual cuisine leaves the experts unimpressed.


Pretty Girls Don't Eat Tacos

"A teenaged Texas beauty queen accused by contest sponsors of infractions including gaining too much weight by eating tacos was stripped of her crown on Wednesday." [Via]


Journalists In Texas Packing Heat, Just Like Everyone Else

Things they don't teach you in journalism school: Reporters in Austin are taking concealed handgun classes so they can use the express lane when they need to enter the Texas Capitol. "The theory, apparently, is that people licensed to pack heat have undergone a thorough background check and can be waved right through." (You will also learn why some Texans carry more than one gun at a time.)


Jimmy Dean, 1928-2010

He'd butchered hogs on his family's farm as a kid, so after becoming a country music star, he knew how to set himself up for life after showbiz: a sausage company, established in 1969 right in his hometown of Plainview, Texas. It was a hugely successful venture, growing to be valued at $75 million, and inspiring a passionate devotion among fans who sometimes, very famously, could literally not get enough of the delicious spiced meat. Jimmy Dean died Sunday at the age of 81.


The SEC Doesn't Care About Your Ponzi Schemes

How corrupt, cartelized, and conflict-ridden are industry oversight and enforcement practices in the financial sector? You could set about answering that question by poking through the lurid headlines surrounding Goldman Sachs-the latest being the release of Goldman emails openly contradicting the firm's alibi of first resort, that it lost money on the collapse of the housing market and therefore couldn't have been defrauding investors in its short-shelling Abacus fund, as the Securities and Exchange Commission alleges. Or you could look at the ridiculously conflicted status of credit-rating agencies-which collect their fees from the very investment concerns they're supposed to be clinically and impartially sizing up, and which, [...]


The Texas Stadium Massacre

Because who doesn't like seeing things blow up, here is how the demolition of Texas Stadium played out yesterday. "In the end, just three pillars stood leaning, leading Herbert Gears, mayor of the Dallas suburb of Irving where the stadium was located, to joke to AFP: 'Now we've got Stonehenge.'"


Devin the Dude, "What I Be On"

A lot of folks are wondering what people in Texas are smoking in light of the state board of education's decision to change its social studies curriculum to reflect a more conservative outlook. A new video from the great Houston rap-crooner Devin the Dude provides some insight.


Paper of Record: That 11-Year-Old in Texas Is Actually a Victim!

The 11-year-old in Texas who was raped by a group of men was not, it turns out, asking for it, reports the paper of record, which was previously not really clear regarding the sixth-grader's ability to be considered a "proper" rape victim. (That is, when the paper wasn't overly concerned about the futures of the young men involved.) Yes, it's do-over time on the most outrageous story in the world, one that was so wildly mishandled that it prompted world-wide outcry and now… another, more thorough story—a story that is now about a "nightmarish ordeal." (You think?) It turns out the 11-year-old in question was a very [...]


Ten Things The Size Of Texas

• Shifting, avalanching, freezing-and-unfreezing dark basalt sand dunes encircling the North Pole of the planet Mars

• Area flooded around the city of Rockhampton, in Queensland, Australia last month

God's rusty steel ring

The hole you left deep inside of my heart


Texas Republicans Hate Every Jew But Jesus

"They're some of my best friends. I'm not bigoted at all; I'm not racist." —Texas State Republican Executive Committee member John Cook explains that his desire to oust Republican House Speaker Joe Straus, who is Jewish, is not a matter of prejudice. "I got into politics to put Christian conservatives into office. They’re the people that do the best jobs over all," says Cook, who wants to oust the Republican House Speaker because he is Jewish. "My favorite person that's ever been on this earth is a Jew," added Cook, presumably referring to Woody Allen. On a related note, I have always thought that I could have [...]


Houston Local News Show Explains Where Heart Attacks Come From

You will either consider this a compelling study in regional culinary folkways or the most disgusting thing you've ever seen. Actually, you can make a case for both. Either way, my arteries hardened just watching it.


Justice And "The Ick Factor"

This article by Dahlia Lithwick on Charles Dean Hood-the Texas death row inmate whose trial judge and prosecutor were having a secret affair-is as good as anything she's ever written, which is saying a lot.


What Is It About Texas?

"Coker acknowledged that he thought Shaver became 'a little annoyed' with him after he took out his pocketknife and stirred his whiskey and water because the bar had no swizzle sticks. But other than that, Coker said, he has no idea why Shaver got angry enough to shoot him." -Legendary musician Billy Joe Shaver is currently for aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. The 70-year-old Shaver, who claims self-defense, shot Billy Coker in the face outside Papa Joe's Texas Saloon in Lorena.